Tuesday, October 17, 2006

Children Learn What They Live.

Post 43 - - - - - - - Monday. 16th October 2006.

Hello my friends, I hope all is well in your part of this

world of ours. All OK here. My visitor, Michelle has

arrived safely and we have enjoyed the day, She has

gone off to bed, as she has been so busy and is very

tired. She has sold her house, stored her furniture

settled all the business attached to that. Hopefully she

will feel brighter tomorrow.

Another oldie tonight, which I hope you will enjoy.

Children Learn What they Live.

If a child lives with criticism

He learns to condemn !

If a child lives with hostility

He learns to fight !

If a child lives with ridicule

He learns to be shy !

If a child lives with shame

He learns to feel guilty !

If a child lives with tolerance

He learns to be patient !

If a child lives with encouragement

He learns confidence !

If a child lives with praise

He learns to appreciate !

If a child lives with fairness

He learns justice !

If a child lives with security

He learns to have faith !

If a child lives with approval

He learns to like himself !

If a child lives with acceptance and friendship

He learns to find love in the world.

<><><><><><>

One day Bill complained to his friend that his elbow really

hurt. His friend suggested that he go to a computer at the

drug store that can diagnose anything quicker and cheaper

than a doctor.

“Simply put in a sample of your urine and the computer will

diagnose your problem and tell you what you can do about it.

It only costs $10.”

Bill figured he had nothing to lose, so he filled a jar with a

urine sample and went to the drug store. Finding the computer,

he poured in the sample and deposited the $10. The machine

started making some noise, and various lights started flashing.

After a brief pause out popped a small slip of paper on which

was printed: “You have tennis elbow. Soak your arm in warm

water. Avoid heavy lifting. It will be better in two weeks.”

Later that evening while thinking how amazing this new

technology was and how it could change medical science

forever, he began to wonder if this machine could be fooled

He mixed together some tap water, a stool samle from his and

urine samples from his wife and daughter. To top it off, he

masturbated into the concoction. He went back to the drug

store, located the machine, poured in the sample and deposited

the $10. The machine made the usual noises and printed the

following message ; “Your tap water is too hard. Get a water

softener. Your dog has worms. Get him some vitamins. Your

daughter is using cocaine. Put her in a rehab clinic. Your

wife is pregnant with twin girls. They aren’t yours. Get a lawyer

Amd if you don’t stop jerking off, your tennis elbow will never

get better.”

<><><><>

When my husband and I arrived at an automobile dealership

to pick up our csr, we were told that the keys had been locked

in it. We went to the service department and found a mechanic

working feveishly to unlock the driver’s side door.

As I watched from the passenger side, I instinctively tried the

door handle and discovered that it was unlocked.

“Hey,” I announced to the technician, “It’s open !” To which he

replied, “I know – I already got that side.”

<><><><>

I live in a small rural area.. We recently had a new neighbor call

the local township administrative office to request the removal

of the Deer Crossing sign on our road. The reason : too many

deer were being hit by cars”, and he didn’t want them crossing there anymore.

<><><><>

Knowledge and understanding are life’s faithful companions who

will never be untrue to you. For knowledge is your crown, and

understanding your staff; and when they are with you, you can

possess no greater treasure. - - - Kahlil Gibran.

Let there be more joy and laughter in your living.

- - - Eileen Caddy.

The two best Physicians of them all ---- Dr. Laughter and

Dr Sleep. - - - Gregory Dean.

Enough for tonight. Take care my friends. Merle.

October 16th 2006. - - - - Post 43

9 comments:

Ky Boo Gal said...

Well you have Doctored me good with Laughter this evening Miz Merle!!
I got to come out to play for a little while as I'm not feeling terrible bad this evening after work...guess I'm getting somewhat used to it now!
:-D

PEA said...

I'm so glad you're having a wonderful time with Michelle...does sound like she's been awfully busy! I just know you'll make sure she has a nice relaxing visit:-)How long will she be staying? I so enjoyed your post again today...you always manage to make me smile and laugh:-) Take care dear Merle...hugs xox

Gwen said...

Hi Merle.
Just had a laugh at your jokes as I always do.
Hope you enjoy Michelle's visit, stay well till I visit again.

Jeanette said...

Dear Merle
How true about the child,you just gave me a good laugh at the jokes and the sayings.
Have a lovely time with Michelle its nice to have company.
Take Care Keep smiling Love. Jan xxx.
Ps, ive missed aday ill will go have a read

Lucy Stern said...

Merle, I have always enjoy that poem about "Children Learn what they live". I hope I taught my children well by example. Sometimes I wonder.

Puss in Boots said...

Hi Merle. Thank you for your comment and putting me right about the singer of the song that I got wrong, lol. I bet Michelle's tired, she sounds as if she has hardly had time to scratch herself! Hope you two enjoy your time together.

Thanks for the jokes, especially the one about the sore elbow, that was really funny!

Take care, dear friend.

Love & hugs

Robyn xoxo

Zanne said...

Your post always provides the prescribed laughter ;-) just got to work on the sleep bit!!!
Have a great time with Michelle.

HORIZON said...

What a lovely quote by Kahlil Gibran. You will be having a nice time today with your visitor, Michelle. I hope you have nice weather and a good time together.
Bests and hugs for you Merle (())

Granny said...

I've always wondered how the deer know exactly where to cross - ours say "deer crossing (with a picture) next 5 miles".