Friday, November 24, 2006

My Choice.

Post 75 - - - - - Friday, 24 November 2006.

Hello everyone ~~ I hope you are all enjoying life and the weekend ahead will be a good one for you. I guess all the

turkey has been eaten by now in the US, so I hope that

you all had fun and lots to be thankful for. I am feeling

a little tired after the day travelling, but quite OK.

I have chosen a piece tonight called “My Choice.”

When the Lord gave out brains,

I thought He said trains ---

And I missed mine !!

When He gave out looks,

I thought He said books ---

And I didn’t want any !!

And when he gave out noses,

I thought He said roses ---

And I ordered a big one !!

When he gave out legs,

I thought He said kegs ---

So I ordered two fat ones !!

When He gave out ears,

I thought He said beers ---

So I ordered two long ones !!

When He gave out chins,

I thought He said gins ---

So I said, “Give me a double.”

Oh Lord, am I a mess !! - - - Anonymous.

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Now to find some jokes - - - -

“Oh God,” sighed the wife one morning, “I’m convinced my mind

is almost completely gone,”

Her husband looked up from the newspaper and commented,

“I’m not surprised. You’ve been giving me a piece of it every day

for thirty years.”

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Adam and Eve were the happiest and the luckiest couple in the world, because neither of them had a mother-in-law.

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Patient : How do my X-rays look Doctor ?

Doctor : Well I just talked to my accountant and it looks like you’re going to need surgery.

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“Have you ever made a serious mistake in treating a patient ?” asked the friend of the surgeon.

“Never but once,” replied the surgeon.

“Was it fatal ?”

“Almost. I charged a man $7500 for an operation and found out later he had $20,000. “

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I never drink anything stronger than gin for breakfast. A woman drove me to drink and I didn’t even have the decency to thank her. What contemptible scoundrel has stolen the cork to my lunch ? - - - W. C. Fields.

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How do you get a guy with a PhD in history off your porch ?

Pay him for the pizza.

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A teacher of the earth science slass was lecturing on map reading. After explaining about longitude, latitude, degrees and minutes the teacher asked, “Suppose I asked you to meet me for lunch at 23 degrees, 15 minutes longitude ?

After a confused silence, a voice volunteered, “I guess you’d be

eating alone.”

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John was talking to his friend in school. My father doesn’t know whether to buy a bicycle or a cow. Susan tried to give some advice, “ Your father would look silly riding a cow.”

“And he would look sillier milking a bicycle,” replied John.

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A few quotes to finish with - - - -

A man who asks is a fool for five minutes. A man who never asks

is a fool for life. - - Chinese proverb.

A real friend is one who walks in when the rest of the world

walks out. - - - Unknown.

A smile is a window in your face to show your heart is home.

Anger is one letter short of danger.- - Eleanor Roosevelt.

Be careful what you ask for, you may get it. – - - Unknown.

Bye for now folks, Take care, Merle.

Post 75 - - - - Friday, 24 November 2006.

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12 comments:

Joy said...

Hi Merle,

It's "leftover" day...always something my kids and I love. My daughter and I actually put up ALL my Xmas decorations yesterday...except for the tree. That will be today when my son comes over to help. I wss just too pooped to tackle that job too...I barely made it upstairs last night. I have WAYYYYYY too many decorations. But, I LOVE when they're all up. Other than that, my Thanksgiving was very quiet..just me, my daugher and my girlfriend. My son had to work (local police dept.). Amazing how fast the day goes.

Love some of the quotes you have today dear friend. You have a wonderful weekend too Merle...bless your sweet heart.

Jeanette said...

Dear Merle
I missed blogging yesterday
Pleased your home safe and sound and well rested after your trip.
To Mt Beauty.
good jokes . The lord gave out brains hahaha.. Good quotes! A real friend got my vote.
Take care keep laughing. Jan

UKBob said...

Ha ha - I like the pizza delivery joke, it's so true. I was about to say I haven't got much planned for the weekend but I have the meeting with my boss also its a V8 Supercar weeekend so for sure I will be tuned to Aus TV for that, I can't miss that can I?!! Anyway whatever happens it's sure to be a good weekend knowing I have friends like you.

Rhea said...

Thanks for the Thanksgiving wishes. I live in Boston and had a great day. I made sure to make a donation to a charitable organization yesterday and urged others to do the same.

Sue said...

Hi Merle,
Thanks for the good jokes and fine quotes. I especially liked this one "A smile is a window in your face to show your heart is home."
I try to always make sure my heart is home!
((hugs))

Peter said...

Hi Merle, good to see you survived the trip to Mt Beauty, bet you didn't go the High road that we took.

jel said...

Hi Merle,
thanksgiving was good !

you get some rest, take care

Pamela said...

Merle, nice to be tired from getting out and about! I am recovering from all the cooking, cleaning and company that never seemed to want to leave! hehe! Loved the one about being a mess, and I would probably be eating alone too. Have a great weekend! :)

Janice said...

Hi Gwen,

We too are eating our thanksgiving left over, yummy.

Good jokes!

Janice~

Lucy Stern said...

I'm woren out this "day after" Thanksgiving. I am making soup from the turkey carcuss. I liked your first story best.

Lee-ann said...

Merle, HELLO! yes the computer is back and they have now taken away the mouse and keyboard as they too have been toing weird! things so I am trying to get around this new one it is different shape and I touch the wrong keys.........anyway it looks like you have been away for a trip I am sure glad you are home safe.

We have adds on our tv at the moment for some huge (with fireworks and all) openning of a new shopping center up your way. did you need another one?

look after yourself and I will be back again soon.........I always enjoy a visit to have a good laugh at the jokes you let us in on.
Lee-ann

rhapsody said...

Sorry about the ants- they're so annoying but I know you'll get 'em!

Thanks for all the good jokes & wise words- & have a great weekend:)