Friday, February 23, 2007

The Reading Mother.

Post 148 - - - - - Friday, 23 rd February, 2007.

Howdy Folks ~~ Hope all is well with you as the week nears the end, and that the weekend will be enjoyable for you. I am fine, had my ct scan but they were running
very late so I was there for three hours. There are quite a lot of taxis in Shepparton
and I get different drivers most times, but today the driver who dropped me off at the
hospital also picked me up. He commented about the length of time I was there.

When I finally got home and had some food, my last was at 4 am, I then proceeded
to sleep half the afternoon. I think the hot weather is catching up with me.
Today, there was a Bush Market on in Shepp. They have it every year, and in fact my
brother, Peter was here last year and we went down to the main streets. They have
lots of goods for sale at bargain prices, all out in front of the shops. I used to love
going in years past. It is on tomorrow, but I have been out too many times already
this week. The taxi driver said it was extremely busy !!

Now to find something to post . . . A little poem called "The Reading Mother"

I had a Mother who read me things
That wholesome life to a child's heart brings --
Stories that stir with upward touch
Oh that every Mother were such !!

You may have tangible wealth untold
Caskets of jewels and coffers of gold.
Richer than I you can never be,
I had a Mother who read to me. - - - -Strickland Gillilan.
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Nice Poem, and I had a Mother who read to me !! She used to read books to
Peter and me, which was great. I have read to my kids, and grandkids too.

Things you don't want to hear during surgery :

Better save that. We'll need it for the autopsy.

Someone call the Janitor - we're going to need a mop.

Spot ! Spot! Come back with that ! Bad Dog !!

Wait a minute, if this is his spleen, then what's that ?

Hand me that ...uh...that...uh...thingie.

Oh no ! I just lost my Rolex.

Damn, there goes the lights again ...

You know there's big money in kidneys. Heck this guy's got two of them.

Everybody stand back ! I lost my contact lens !

Could you stop that thing from beating; it's throwing my concentration off.

What do you mean, he wasn't in for a sex change ?

Anyone see where I left that scalpel ?

Nurse, did this patient sign the organ donor card ?

Don't worry; I think it's sharp enough.

FIRE ! FIRE ! Everyone get out of here !!
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A Preacher was standing at the pulpit giving his Sunday sermon when a note was passed to him. The only thing written on the sheet was IDIOT.

Looking up at the congregation, the preacher smiled and said, "I have heard of men
who write letters and forget to sign their names, but this is the first time I have seen
a man sign his name and forget to write the letter."
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Once upon a time the government had a vast scrap yard in the middle of the desert.
Congress said, "Someone may steal from it at night." So they created a night watch-
man position and hired a person for the job.

Then Congress said, "How does the watchman do his job without instruction ?"
So they created a planning department and hired two people, one person to write the instructions, and one person to do time studies.

Then Congress said, " How will we know the night watchman is doing his tasks
correctly ?" So they created a Quality Control department and hired two people.
One to do the studies and one to write the reports.

Then Congress said, " How are these people going to get paid ?" So they created the following positions : a time keeper, and a pay roll officer. Then they hired two more people.

Then Gongress said, " Who will be accountable for all these people.?" So they
created an administritive section and hired 3 people, an Administrative Officer,an Assisstant Administrative Officer and a Legal Secretary.

Then Congress said, " We have had this command in operation for one year and we are $18,000 over budget, we must cutback overall cost."

So they laid off the night watchman.

And that is how the government works.
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Child's Perspective on Retirement.

A teacher asked her young pupils how they spent their vacation. One child wrote the
following :
We always used to spend the holidays wit Grandma and Grandpa. They used to live
here in a brick house, but Grandpa got retarded and they moved to Florida and now
they live in a place with a lot of other retarded people.

They live in a tin box and have rocks painted green to look like grass. They ride
around on big tricycles and wear name-tags, because they don't know who they are
anymore. They go to a building called a wrecked center, but they must have had it fixed, because it is all right now.

They play games and do exercises there, but they don't do them very well. There is a swimming pool, too, but thay all jump up and down in it with their hats on. I guess
they don't know how to swim.

At their gate, there is a dollhouse with a little old man sitting in it. He watches all
day so nobody can escape. Sometimes they sneak out Then they go cruising in
their golf carts.

My Grandma used to bake cookies and stuff, but I guess she forgot how. Nobody
there cooks, they just go out to eat. And they can eat the same thing every night :
Early Birds. Some of the people can't get past the man in the dollhouse to go out.
So the ones who do get out and bring food back to the wrecked center and call it
pot-luck.

MY Grandma says Grandpa worked hard all his life to earm his retardment and
says that I should work hard so I can be retarded some day too, When I earn my
retardment, I want to be the man in the doll house. Then I will let people out so
they can visit their grandchildren.
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Bye for now, I can't stay awake any longer. Take care of yourselves and each
other. I hope to do some reading and commenting tomorrow. Cheers, Merle.
Post 148 - - - - - - Friday, 23 rd February, 2007.
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13 comments:

audrey` said...

Dearest Merle

Thank you so much for your advice.
I had told my insurer.
I'm leaving the matter to our Lord.

Take care, my friend =)

Leann said...

hope the weather cools down for you.Id send you some of our snow storm that is coming to cool you down,but dont think UPS office would like me very much sending snow and cold on their trucks.HeeHee.God bless,and have a great weekend.

TJ said...

I've only ever been in one taxi and that was in 1977 during an ice storm...I feared for my like I'm tellin' ya!!
My Mom didn't read to us all that much but she took us to the library...does that count?
:-D

Unknown said...

Thanks for "The Reading Mother." I have copied it for further sharing.

Raggedy said...

You have had a very busy week. Staying in the cool air conditioning and reading sounds wonderful.
Fabulous post!
I loved "The Reading Mother". My dad read to me all the time. I still remember many of the books he read to me. When he was here for a visit he read to my daughter and she loved it. My dad changed his voice and got into characters and made them come alive for me. I think it is to his credit that I am an avid reader. What a blessing!
Your jokes today were hillarious and had me in stiches. I will have to pop back in when hubby gets home because he will love the government one..
Cheers, take care, rest, and stay cool.
Your posts bring so much joy to my world dear friend. Thank you.
Hugs and Love,
Raggedy

Mountain Mama said...

I pray your test is fine. I sent the poem about the mother reading, to my daughter. It sure fits her life.

Margaret said...

Dear Merle, My mother was a great one to read to us as well, I also read to my children, one is an avid reader, Justin read a fair amount, the other two do not read much at all. Two of my daughters in law are avid readers.
The Congress joke is close enough to the truth to be scary. I found lots of very enjoyable reading as usual.
Love Margaret

Pamela said...

Merle, hope all is well with your CT scan. Three hours is such a long time to have to wait.

Loved reading to my kids when they were growing up and look forward to reading to the two grand babies Ben and Arianna! :)

The one on Government couldn't be more true, sometimes they are so inept and wasteful and then the red tape. Enjoy your weekend! :)

Val said...

I love the child's perspective on retirement! And of course the poem on the reading mother. I too was fortunate to have a reading mother, even though she is not a reader herself. Neither of my parents are readers, nor my brother, even though he was read to by Mom, my sister and myself. But my sister and I are absolute fanatics for reading. How did that happen?

Carole Burant said...

Dearest Merle...you've been a busy woman this past week!! I do hope the results from your CT scan are fine. Glad to hear that your check up had good results:-) You've filled me with laughter again with all your jokes...the things you don't want to hear in surgery is so very funny!! It was very frigid here again today, made even more so with the biting wind...I didn't go out at all, rather stay warm and cozy inside:-) Take good care of yourself my friend xoxo

JunieRose2005 said...

Dear Merle,

I loved the last one- about the grandparents in a retardment place! ;)

Take care,

Junie

Lee said...

Hi there Merle...don't you go overdoing things...make sure you spend tomorrow, Sunday, just resting...that's what Sundays are for! :)

Jeanette said...

Hi Dear Merle
Oh My 3hrs wait and nothing to eat.Your tummy must have been having hunger pangs,And I do hope your scan comes back with good results.
Had a good laugh tonight granpa had to work hard at his retardment.
Mum always encouraged us to read, and I read to my kids and used to go to the local school and help the slow readers. and I still like to read. Take care get plenty of rest see you soon Love Janxxx