Wednesday, April 25, 2007

Do You Think She Speaks Love ?

Post 193 - - - - - - Wednesday, 25th April, 2007.

Hi Everyone ~~ As Anzac Day draws to a close for another year, it
is gratifying to hear that the crowds have increased in size and with
young ones showin more interest than they used to do.

I hope everything is going well for all of you. Fine here, with no
complaints. I cooked a large chicken today with some roast vegies
and others and made up 10 meals. Some to freeze, some to give away
and several for me in the fridge and freezer.

Tonight I have a nice little story called "Mommy, Do You Think She
Speaks Love ?" I hope you enjoy it.

Lots of parents are filled with pride when the talk about how bright,
beautiful, and/or talented their children are. I'm certainly no
different. I look for every chance to show pictures of my kids and
regale my captive listeners with anecdotes of their charm and
cleverness.

Years ago, a proud Mom named Gail Silvers wrote me of a quality in
her adopted six year old son Kyle ---- his loving heart. Apparently,
Kyle has a poetry of love and kindness in his blood. When he was
five, he told his mom, "When I kiss you, it means my heart is going to
into my lips to tell you how much I love you."

She told us of the time when she and Kyle were on their way home after
a five-hour stint with Meals on Wheels and they stopped to render aid
to a woman whose car had broken down. In her car were three children
including a two year old baby.

When Kyle's mom told him the family needed some help, he replied,
"There's a baby in the car who's scared because their car is broken.
I have to talk to her."

His mom told him the little girl didn't speak English, and he said,
"Mommy, do you think she speaks love ?"

Kyle went to the baby, talked quietly with her, hugged her, and kissed
her cheek. Then he entertained the two year old with a 10 minute
slapstick routine that even took Gail by surprise.

As the baby and everyone else laughed, it was clear that Kyle's instincts
were right. The baby knew how to speak love, a universal language we
all ought to speak more often.
<><><>

Brunette Jokes for Blondes.

Why do brunettes like their dark hair color ?
It doesn't show the dirt.

Why are brunettes so proud of their hair ?
It matches their moustache.

Why is the color brunette considered evil ?
When's the last time you saw a blonde witch ?

How can you tell if a brunette is lonely ?
Check her for a pulse.

Why do brunettes wear training bras ?
It's cheaper than changing their band-aids every day.

Why did they quit selling brunette Barbie dolls ?
Parents felt the dandruff might be contagious.

How do brunettes get tangles out of their hair ?
With a rake.

What kind of costumes do brunettes wear on Halloween ?
They just stand on their heads and go as dirty mops.

Why did God create brunettes ?
So ugly men wouldn't feel left out.

What do brunettes miss most, about a great party ?
The invitation.

What's the real reason a brunette keeps her figure ?
No one else wants it.

Why are so many blonde jokes one-liners ?
So brunettes can remember them.

What do you call a brunette in a room full of blondes ?
Invisible.

What's a brunette's mating call ?
"Has the blonde left yet ?"

What's black and blue and brown and laying in the ditch ?
A brunette who told too many blonde jokes.
<><><>

Next joke from my friend Sandy Thanks Sandy.

Never choke in a restaurant in Kentucky. - - - -

Two KY hillbillies walk into a restaurant. After ordering their
cornbread and beans, they talk about the latest addition to
their junkyard business.

Suddenly, a woman at a nearby table, who is eating a sandwich,
begins to cough. After a minute or so, it becomes apparent
that she is in real distress.

One of the hillbilles looks at her and says, Kin ya swallar ?"
The woman shakes her head NO.

The hillbilly walks over to the woman, lifts up the back of her
dress, yanks down her drawers, and quickly gives her right butt
cheek a lick with his tongue.

The woman is so shocked that she has a violent spasm and the
obstruction flies out of her mouth. As she begins to breathe
again, the hillbilly walks slowly back to the bar.

His partner says, "Ya know, I'd heared of dat dere 'Hind Lick
Manouver,' but I ain't never seed nobody do it."
<><><>

Are You in Love ?

LOVE when your eyes meet across a crowded room,
LUST . when your tongues meet across a crowded room.
MARRIAGE . . when your belt won't fit around your waist and
you don't care.


LOVE . . . when intercourse is called making love.
LUST . . . all other times.
MARRIAGE . . . what's intercourse ?


LOVE ....... when you share everything you own.
LUST . . . . when you think twice about giving your partner
bus money.
MARRIAGE. . . .when the bank owns everything.


LOVE . . . . . . whenyou phone each other just to say Gidday.
LUST . . . . . . . . when you phone each other just to organize sex.
MARRIAGE . . . when you phone each other to find out what time
your son's game starts.


LOVE . . . . . . . when you write poems about your partner.
LUST . . . . . . when all you write is your phone number.
MARRIAGE. . . when all you write is checks.


LOVE . . . . . . . .. when nobody else matters.
LUST . . . . . . . .. . when nobody else knows.
MARRIAGE . . . when everybody else matters and you don't
care who knows.

LOVE . . . . . . . . . .when breaking up is something you try not to
think about.
LUST . . . . . . . . when staying together is something you try not
to think about.
MARRIAGE . . . when just getting through today is your only thought.

<><><>

As long as you can laugh at yourself you will never cease to be amused.

Common sense and education are highly compatible. In fact neither is
worth much without the other.

Don't be too timid and squeamish about your acrions. All life is an
experiment.

Except when larning to swim it's good to start at he bottom.

Fear not that thy life shall come to an end, but rather that it shall
ever have a beginning.

Friendship is born at the moment when one person says to
another : "What ? You too ! Thought I was the only one.

Goodnight, my friends. Love one another. heers, Merle.

Post 193 - - - - - Wednesday, 25th April, 2007.
<><><><>


9 comments:

Susie said...

I love cooking up so extra meals for nights when I'm tired or busy!
Your chicken will taste good on those nights, and I'm sure your friends will appreciate you sharing too!
I love the story about the language of love. So true, as love is always universal!
xoxo

Donnak said...

You have the best stuff in your blog Merle. I always enjoy reading what you post.

PEA said...

Hello dear Merle:-) I'm back from my trip and now playing catch up with everyone! Thank you so much for your email...I realized after I had left that I had goofed! lol I've caught up with all your posts that I had missed...I hadn't heard of Anzac Day and found it so very interesting to learn about it. This is what I love about blogging, you learn so much of what goes on in other countries:-) Loved today's post as well..."Speaks of Love" is just so darn precious!! Glad to see the Brunettes get joked about this time! LOL Much love my friend xoxo

Puss-in-Boots said...

Hi Merle

I had roast chicken the other night, with a couple of meals for the freezer and then some cold with a salad. The carcass I'm using for chicken soup.

Have a great day.

audrey` said...

Hi Merle

Yeah!
Love is our universal language =)

Take care, my friend.

Lee said...

The thought of that roast chicken and all the vegies has made me hungry, Merle!

Another fun post...thank you. :)

Val said...

Well, I've NEVER heard of brunette jokes, but they were darn funny, even though I was always happy to be a brunette.

HORIZON said...

Ah ha! We had chicken yesterday too ;) Am using the same for a soup today. Glad to read you've been busy with the garden- l hope to be this weekend. The sun is finally shining here after a whole week of heavy rain- whew!
Have spent the morning with Sam- he got at the cactus and l had to sit for half and hour with tweezers pulling the little hairs out- poor lad.
I'll have to give my sis a copy of these brunette jokes- she'll love them.
The first story was so sweet- l remember noting down some of the funny things Sam would say. Laughted out loud at the hillbillie joke ;)
hugs and take care Merle- think of you often
xx

Jeanette said...

Dear Merle. Im feeling a lot better today, Im pleased you liked my Photo's.
Nice story and good jokes once again haha the brunette ones are new to me i think the hillbilly goy my vote tonight. take care