Saturday, June 09, 2007

Keepers.

Post 224 - - - - - Saturday, 9th June, 2007.

Hello Everyone ~ I hope you are all enjoying the weekend and
that the weather is to your liking. We have had some storms
around Sydney and Newcastle that have taken some lives. I
hope they ease now, so folks can get back to their homes and
normal lives. The Emergency People are wonderful and go
out in all weathers to help people in need. Great job from the
men and women who take on this voluntary work and they
deserve the gratitude of us all, as do the Police who also have
some awful jobs that have to be done.

Thank you so much to all those who wished John a Happy
Birthday. He called in today and said he had a good day.
No wonder I feel old
, when he is 53. I am 73 and still going
strong. My footy team Carlton are heading for another
great win. At 3/4 time we are 10 goals ahead. Yippee !!

Tonight I have an article sent to me by my friend Barbara.
It is called "Keepers." Thanks Barbara.

I grew up with practical parents who had been frightened by
the Great Depression in the 1930 s. A mother, God love her,
who washed aluminium foil after she cooked in it, them she
reused it. She was the original recycle queen, before they had
a name for it.... A father who was happier getting old shoes
fixed than buying new ones.

Their marriage was good, their dreams focused. Their best
friends lived barely a wave away. I can see them now; Dad
in trousers, tee shirt and a hat and Mum in a house dress,
lawn mower in one hand and dish towel in the other. It was
the time for fixing things; a curtain rod, the kitchen radio,
screen door, the oven door, the hem of a dress.

Things we keep.

It was a way of life, and sometimes it made me crazy. All
that repairing, eating, renewing, I wanted just once to be
wasteful. Waste meant affluence. Throwing things away
meant you knew there'd always be more.

But then my father died, and on that clear fall night, in the
warmth of the hospital room, I was struck with the pain of
learning that sometimes there isn't any more.

Sometimes, what we care about most gets all used up and
goes away ....never to return. So....While we have it . . . .
it's best we love it. . . And care for it . . . .And fix it when
it's broken . . . And heal it when it's sick.

This is true . . .For marriage. . And old cars. . . And children
with bad report cards . . .And dogs and cats with bad hips . . .
And aging parents . . .And grandparents. We keep them
because they are worth it, because we are worth it. Some
things we keep. Like a best friend that moved away or a
classmate we grew up with.

There are just some things that make life important, like
people we know who are special . . . And so, we keep them
close!

Good friends are like stars , , , you don't always see them, but
you know they are always there.
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Super Granny. An elderly lady did her shopping and upon
returning to her car, found four males in the act of leaving
with her car. She dropped her shopping bags and drew her
hand gun, proceeding to scream at them at the top of her
voice, "I have a gun and I know how to use it !!"

"Get out of the car, you scumbags !!" The four men didn't
wait for a second invitation but got out and ran like mad,
where-upon the lady, somewhat shaken, proceeded to load
her shopping bags into the back of the car, and got into the
driver's seat.

She was so shaken that she could not get her key into the
ignition. She tried and tried and then it dawned on her why.
A few minutes later she found her own car parked four or
five spaces farther down. She loaded her bags into her car
and drove to the police station.

The sergeant to whom she told the story nearly tore himself
in two with laughter and pointed to the other end of the
counter, where four pale white males were reporting a car
jacking by a mad elderly woman described as white, less
than 5 feet tall, glasses, curly white hair carrying a large
handgun.

No charges were filed. True story.
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My dear friend Robyn sent me these a while ago,
Thanks Robyn.

Some answers to Children's Science exam.

Q. Name the four seasons.
A. Salt, pepper, mustard and vinegar.

Q. How is dew formed ?
A. The sun shines down on the leaves and makes them perspire.

Q. How can you delay milk turning sour ?
A. Keep it in the cow.

Q. Explain one of the processes by which water can be made
safe.
A. Flirtation makes water safe to drink because it removes
large pollutants like grit, sand, dead sheep and canoeists.

Q. What are steroids ?
A. Things for keeping carpets still on the stairs.

Q. What happens to your body as you age ?
A. When you get old, so do your bowels and you get
intercontinental.

Q. What happens to a boy when he reaches puberty ?
A. He says goodbye to his boyhood and looks forward
to his adultery.

Q. Name a disease associated with cigarettes.
A. Premature death.

Q. What is the fibula ?
A. A small lie.

Q. What does varicose mean ?
A. Nearby.

Q. What does the word "benign" mean ?
A. Benign is what you will be after you be eight.
<><><>

A drunken cowboy lay sprawled across 3 entire seats in the posh
Amarillo Theater when the usher came by and noticed this, he
whispered to the cowboy, "Sorry Sir, but you are only allowed
one seat."

The cowboy groaned but didn't budge. The usher became more
impatient : "Sir, if you don't get up from there, I'm going to have
to get the manager."

Once again, the cowboy just groaned. The usher marched briskly
back up the aisle, and in a moment he returned with the manager.
Together, the two of them tried repeatedly to move the cowboy,
but with no success.

Finally, they summoned the police. The Texas Ranger surveyed
the situation briefly then asked, "All right, Buddy, what's your
name ?

"Fred," the cowboy moaned.

"Where are you from Fred ?" asked the Ranger.

With terrible pain in his voice, and without moving a muscle,
Fred replied, ...."the balcony . . ."

Thanks Warren for that one.
<><><>

A few quotes - - - -

Experience is not what happens to a man. It is what a man
does with what happens to him. - - -Aldous Huxley.

Experience is the name everyone gives to his mistakes.
- - - - Oscar Wilde.

Be still, sad heart ! and cease repining;
Behind the clouds is the sun still shining;
Thy fate is the common fate of all'
Into each life, some rain must fall.
- - - Henry Wadsworth Longfellow.

Without winter, there can be no spring,
Without mistakes, there can be no learning,
Without doubts, there can be no faith.
Without fears,there can be no courage.
My mistakes, my fears and my doubts are my
path to wisdom, faith and courage. - - - - Anonymous.

Whatever fate befalls you, do not give way to great rejoicing,
or great lamentation
. . .
All things are full of change, and
your fortunes may turn at any moment.
- - - - Arthur Schopenhauer,

Bye for now folks, Carlton did win !! Take great care of your
loved ones and yourselves. Love and best wishes, Merle.

Post 224 - - - - - Saturday, 9th June, 2007.
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10 comments:

Leann said...

LOL...
love the lady with the gun..
{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{HUGS}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}
God bless have a great day....

Christina said...

LOL @ the granny with the gun!

Steve G said...

The lady with the gun and the cowboy from the balcony were great. Thanks, Merle, I needed a laugh.

Sometimes Saintly Nick said...

I’m sorry to hear about the death-dealing storms. Sometimes I forget how destructive Mother Nature can be.

Mountain Mama said...

My goodness, I am so sorry about the awful storms. I pray it stops and no further lives are endangered.

The Kids science exam had me snorting!
I love the one about aging bodies bowels becoming interconinental. LOL
And the 'fibula' definition is too funny. I just love kids ideas of things!
Hope all is well in your neck of the woods Merle. Stay safe and warm
Blessings

JunieRose2005 said...

Merle,

Those jokes were great. I liked the cowboy from the balcony best! :)

Take care, Merle.

June

"Early Bird" said...

You are so very right about Emergency workers...they don't get near enough praise for all they do!
Glad you are safe!
:)

Jim said...

Hi Merle -- Each one of those is good for a laugh.
BTW, you didn't say 73 was old, did you?
..

Jeanette said...

Dear merle,I agree with you about the emergency workers,
You gave me a good laugh at tonights jokes specially the granny and her gun and the cowboy..
take care stay warm going to a very cold day Monday forecast 13cBBrrrrrrr..

smilnsigh said...

Merle, I just read of the terrible storm damage in your country. I'm so sorry to hear of the death and destruction. My heart goes out to all who were caught in this natural disaster.

Hugs,
Mari-Nanci