Wednesday, September 12, 2007

Would you Stay or Run ?

Post 310 - - - - Wednesday, 12th September, 2007.

Hello Everyone ~~ I hope you have all had a good day, and that
the world is treating you right. I am fine and I rang John and he
is coping with work OK, still coughing, but feeling much better.

I have read many tributes for 9/11 and there has been quite a bit
on the news etc. Those of us who lived through that disastrous
day will NEVER ever forget it. I liked my brother Peter 's post
with a different angle, a more positive one.

A few more photos tonight - - -

A gift from my daughter Julie, years ago, lovely hanging bells. Lovely.

Lovely little angel bear sleeping on his fancy bed, I bought ages ago.

Another camelia bush out in flower. This has the big red flowers.

A clearer pic of my 4 eldest grand-daughters, Rebecca 27, Rachael
and Samantha both 25, and Jackie the birthday girl 30. Sam belongs
to Julie and the other three are John's daughters. They all live in Q'ld.

I have a short item tonight for you. It is called "Would you stay or run?"

Imagine this happening to you, Would you run or stay .....

One Sunday morning during service, a 2,000 member congregation
was surprised to see two men enter, both covered from head to toe in
black and carrying sub-machine guns. One of the men proclaimed,
"Anyone willing to take a bullet for Christ, remain where you are.

Immediately the choir fled, the deacons fled and most of the
congregation fled. Out of the 2,000 there only remained around 20.

The man who had spoken took off his hood, looked at the preacher
and said, "Okay Pastor, I got rid of all the hypocrites. Now you may
begin your service. Have a nice day !!" And the two men walked out.

Time for a few jokes - - - -

A large well- established Canadian lumber camp advertised that they
were looking for a good lumberjack.

The very next day, a skinny little man showed up at the camp with his
axe and knocked on the head lumberjack's door. He took one look at
the little man and told him to leave.

"Just give me a chance to show you what I can do," said the skinny man.

"Okay, see that giant redwood over there?" said the lumberjack. "Take
your axe and cut it down."

The skinny man headed for the tree, and in five minutes he was back
knocking on the lumberjack's door. "I cut the tree down," he said.

The lumberjack couldn't believe his eyes and said, "Where did you get
the skill to chop down trees like that?"

"In the Sahara Forest," replied the puny man.
"You mean the Sahara Desert," said the lumberjack.

The little man laughed and answered back, "Oh sure, that's what
they call it now !!"
I hope this one is all right, I don't mean to offend.

Bush's Tragedy.

One day President Bush visited an elementary school. All the
kids were so excited to get to meet the President. He began to
talk to them and asked them to define the word 'tragedy'.

"Well," one girl replied, If my Mummy ran over my dog, Rover,
That would be a tragedy!"
The President smiled at the little girl and said, "No, sweetie.
That would be an accident. Can anyone give it a try?"

A little boy sitting across the room raised his hand and said,
"I know! I know! If our bus driver ran off a cliff and killed
The President shook his head and said, "No, son. That would
be a great loss. Doesn't anyone know a good example of a

A small girl raised her hand and said, "Well, Mr. President, if
you and Laura were in Air Force One and it was hit by a missile
and blown to smithereens, most people would think that was
a tragedy !"

"Very good," he said, "And what was your reason for that answer?"

"Well," she said, "It would not be an accident and it sure would
not be a great loss !!"

Two Scots, Archie and Jock are sitting in the pub discussing
Jock's forthcoming wedding.

"Ach, it's all going grand," says Jock. "I've got everything
organised already, the flowers, the church, the cars, the
reception, the rings, the minister, even my stag night."

Archie nod approvingly.

"Heavens, I 've even bought a kilt to be married in, " says Jock.
"A kilt ?" exclaims Archie. That's braw, you'll look pure smart
in that. And what's the tartan?" Archie enquires.

"Och," says Jock. "I'd imagine she'll be in white !!"

Q. "Mummy, Mummy, why is Dad running in zig zags
A. "Shut up and keep shooting."

Q. Why is it dangerous to eat in the jungle?
A. 'Cause if you add four and four you get ate.

A young pretty girl worked in a local bakery shop and was
required to wear quite a short skirt as part of the uniform.
The problem was that the shop was quite small and the
bread was stacked on high shelves so a ladder had to be
used to get different products.

One of these was raisin bread.

On the days when raisin bread was on special the queues
were four deep and a noticable increase in customers,
particularly elderly gentlemen.

One day she'd been up and down the ladder constantly and by
four o'clock she was exhausted.

Turning to her next customer, a very wrinkled old man who
had been waiting in the queue for quite a while, and she
said sharply. "And I suppose yours is raisin?"

"No," he replied, " But there's a little quiver there."

An Australian journalist in Jerusalem heard about an old
Jewish man who'd been going to the Wailing Wall to pray,
twice a day, every day, for 60 years.

She thought this would make a nice feel-good story so she
went to the Wailing Wall to find the man. After a short
while he arrived. She watched him pray for about 45 minutes
and when he turned to leave, she approached him for an

"I'm Rebecca Smith from the Evening News sir. How long
have you been coming to the Wailing Wall and praying?"

"For about 60 years," he replies slowly.
"That's amazing ! What do you pray for?" she asks.

"I pray for peace between Christians, Jews and Muslims ma'am.
I pray for all the hatred to stop and I pray for all our children
to grow up in peace and friendship."

"How do you feel after doing this for 60 years?" she asks.

"Like I'm talking to a fricking brick wall !!"

Hello, and welcome to the Psychiatric Hotline.

If you are obsessive compulsive, please press 1 repeatedly.

If you are co-dependent, please ask someone to press 2.

If you have multiple personalities, please press 3, 4, 5. and 6.

If you are paranoid delusional . . . . . . .

Little boy goes to his father, "Dad, where did my intelligence
come from ?"
Father replies, " Must be from your mother. I've still got mine."

A few quotes from Sports Heroes. - - - -

People who enjoy what they are doing invariably do it well.
- - - - Joe Gibbs. N F L head coach.

The will to win is worthless if you don't get paid for it.
- - - -
Reggie Jackson. Major league outfielder.

Sweat plus sacrifice equals success, -Charles O. Finley.
- - - Owner, Oakland Athletics.

You play the way you practice. - - Pop Warner, College
football coach.

I'm like a duck : calm above water, but paddling like hell
underneath. - - - Fred Shero. NHL coach & general coach.

Sports is the toy department of human life.
- - - Howard Cosell, Sports broadcaster.

I've realized my dreams of winning a Grand Slam tournament.
If my career was over tomorrow, I got more than I deserved,
than I could ever ask for. - - - Andre Agassi.

That's it for tonight my friends. Enjoy the rest of the week.
Take care of yourselves and each other. Love and best
wishes to you all. Cheers, Merle.

Post 310 - - - - - Wednesday, 12th September, 2007.


Ava said...

So glad to hear that all is well. Yes, that was a much clearer picture of the grand daughters!

Thank you for dropping by my blog. Always appreciate it!

Have a great day!

Lady Di Tn said...

You did it again MADE ME LAUGH.
I would love to grab that bear and hug him. When we get really cute stuffed animals at the thrift shop and I hug them. The other Volunteers think it is funny. Your camelias are absolutely beautiful.
Doc Holliday doubled my meds as he wants to get the first reading of the day down. And as usual EXERCISE , DIET , EXERCISE, DIET. ETC ETC.

Sometimes Saintly Nick said...

Hmmm. Perhaps I needed to have those two dudes in black come to one of my services. I have spent many years trying to separate the lambs from the goats and they did it in a couple of minutes.

Susie said...

Hi Merle,
Wonderful picture of your granddaughters. They're all lovely:)
I laughed and laughed at the lumberjack joke!

mreddie said...

Seems that John is better, sometimes those coughs hang on for a while. Liked the bells and the camilias were beautiful. ec

Leann said...

dear Merle;
this will be short I been gone for days.Anna was sick and I needed to stay longer then I planned.
hope all is great in your part of this old world.
your granddaugthers are pretty.children are a gift from God to bless us.and grandkids are to bless us even more.
love the little sleeping bear and his bed.and those hanging bells are can always find some treasure to bless us.

Granny said...

Nice pictures of the granddaughters.

Val said...

Oh your Mummy Mummy joke brought back memories from when I was a kid in NY (there they are known as Mommy Mommy jokes):

Mommy Mommy, why can't we give Daddy a decent burial?

Shut up and flush the toilet.

Aren't we cruel?

Zanne said...

mummy mummy, can I lick the bowl?
No, use the flush like everyone else!
how do you find so many funny things to post, it's always a joy visiting you, for soul and spirit.
Bless you

audrey` said...

Hi Merle

The camelia is so lovely =)