Tuesday, October 16, 2007

24 Beautiful Lines.

Post 340 ~ ~ ~ ~ Tuesday, 16th October, 2007.

Hi Everyone ~~ I hope you have all had a great day or are about to.
Today was my fortnightly shopping day, so all stocked up again.
I bought some Tomato plants, as well as the food. So I hope I can
get them planted tomorrow.

Couple of photos tonight from my garden.



A very pretty Pelargonium.


This is a Genista shrub - nice yellow flowers.

Recently I was awarded an Award by Raggedy for which I thank her very
much and now I have to pass it on to 5 others. As I think you are all
Fabulous, this is a difficult task - but here goes -

First on my list is Ann of Rocrebelgranny who is an inspiration
to us all the way she copes with whatever fate throws at her
and
her interesting stories about her life and family and info of all sorts.

Next is my friend Jeanette who has a great blog and a wonderful garden
and family and has had many travels to tell us about. She also shares
some jokes with us and is a very generous lady.

Then there is Lee who writes such great stories from her life and
keeps us all interested and begging for more. She also shares
recipes with us as well as her poems and paintings. All great.

Another lovely lady is Susie who writes great stories from her
life and shares photos and all sorts of things with us. A very happy
and cheerful lady with a great blog.

And last, but not least, my brother Peter who has recently had a
great holiday and shared stories and many photos from that, as
well as family pics and poetry etc etc. Beside he would be mad if
I ignored him !!!

There are so many more who deserve to have this Fabulous Award, but
there were limits. Thank you all for being my friends and for your nice
comments. Particularly about my new header pic. Thanks Peter.

Tonight's first item is called 24 Beautiful Lines for 24 Hours
of the day. I hope you enjoy them.

1. Give God what's right, not what's left.

2. Man's way leads to a hopeless end ~~ God's way leads to
an endless hope.

3. A lot of kneeling will keep you in good standing.

4. He who kneels before God can stand before anyone.

5. In the sentence of life, the devil may be a comma, but
never let hom be the period.

6. Don't put a question mark where God puts a period.

7. Are you wrinkled with burden? Come to the church for
a face-lift.

8. When praying, don't give God instructions ~~ just report
for duty.

9. Read the Bible ~~ it will scare the Hell out of you.

10. We don't change God's message ~~His message changes us.

11. The church is prayer-conditioned.

12. When God ordains, He sustains.

13. WARNING: Exposure to the Son may prevent burning.

14. Plan ahead. It wasn't raining when Noah built the ark.

15. Most people want to serve God, but only in an advisory position.

16. Suffering from truth decay? Brush up on your Bible.

17. Exercise daily ~~ walk with the LOrd.

18. Never give the devil a ride ~~ he will always want to drive.

19. Nothing else ruins the truth like stretching it.

20. Compassion is difficult to give away because it keeps
coming back.

21. Give Satan an inch and he'll be a ruler.

22. Be ye fishers of men ~~ you catch them and He'll clean them.

23. God doesn't call the qualified, He qualifies the called.

24. Don't wait for six strong men to take you to church.
<><>

Joke Time - - -

Sitting on the side of the highway waiting to catch speeding
drivers, a Police Officer sees a car puttering along at 22 KPH.
He says to himself, " This driver is just as dangerous as a
speeder!" So he turns on his lights and pulls the driver over.

Approaching the car, he notices that there are five old ladies
~ two in the front seat and three in the back ~ wide eyed and
white as ghosts. The driver, obviously confused, says to him,
"Officer, I don't understand. I was doing exactly the speed
limit ! What seems to be the problem ?"

"Ma'am," the officer replies, "you weren't speeding, but you
should know that driving slower than the speed limit can also
be a danger to other drivers."

"Slower than the speed limit? No sir, I was doing the speed limit
exactly . . .Twenty-two kilometres an hour!" the old woman says
a bit proudly. The Police officer, trying to contain a chuckle
explains to her that 22 is the highway number, not the speed limit.

A bit embarrassed, the woman grins and thanks the officer for
pointing out her error.
"But before I let you go, Ma'am, I have to ask . . Is everyone in this
car OK? These women seem awfully shaken, and they haven't
made a peep this whole time," the officer asks.

"Oh, they will be all right in a minute officer. We just got off
Highway 189."
<><>

At the wake, a woman told her priest that ever since she was
a child, she and her father had discussed life after death. They
had agreed that whoever went first would try to contact the
other. They had discussed it again only 2 weeks before his death.

He died in her home, and a few hours later, the smoke alarm in
her garage went off. She had lived there for 28 years and it had
never gone off before. She didn't know how to stop it and had to
call the security company.

The next morning, the smoke alarm went off again and the reason
finally dawned on her. She said aloud, "OK Dad, I missed the
signal yesterday, but I've got it now. Thanks for letting me know
that you are safe on the other side. Now, turn the darn thing
off so I don't have to call the security company again."
And it went off.

She immediately called her priest to relay the good news. His
response, "Dear, if every time your father sends you a message,
he sets off the smoke alarm, just where do you think he's
calling from ?"
<><>

Q. What happened to the blonde tap dancer ?
A. She fell in the sink.
<><>

Three sisters, aged 92, 94 and 96 live in a house together.
One night the 96 year old runs a bath. She puts one foot in
and pauses. She yells down the stairs, "Was I getting in or
out of the bath ?"

The 94 year
old yells back, "I don't know, but I'll come up
and see." She starts up the stairs and pauses. Then she yells,
"Was I going up the stairs or coming down ?"

The 92 year old is sitting at the kitchen table having tea,
listening to her sisters. She shakes her head and says, "I sure
hope I never get that forgetful."

She knocks on wood for good measure. She then yells, "I'll
come up and help both of you as soon as I see who's at the door."
<><>

Q. What did the blonde say when her boyfriend blew in her ear?
A. "Thanks for the refill, honey."
<><>

Why are married women heavier than single women ?
A single woman comes home and sees what's in the
fridge and goes to bed.

A married woman comes home, sees what's in bed and
goes to the fridge.
<><>


A blonde was shopping at K Mart and came across a shiny
silver thermos. She was quite fascinated by it so asked the
clerk what it was.
The clerk said, " Why, that's a thermos . . . it keeps hot things
hot and cold things cold."
"Wow," said the blonde "that's amazing," so she bought it.

She took it to work the next day and her boss, who was also
blonde, "What's that ?" "Why that's a thermos . . .it keeps hot
things hot and cold things cold. "

"Wow, that's amazing," said the boss, "What do you have in it?"

"Two ice creams and some coffee !!"
<><>

Just a few quotes - - -

Success is not the key to happiness. Happiness is the key to
success. If you love what you are doing, you will be successful.
~ ~ ~ Albert Schweitzer.

I don't know what your destiny will be, but one thing I do know :
the only ones among you who will be really happy are those who
have sought and found how to serve. ~ ~Albert Schweitzer.

I hold it true, whate'er befall;
I feel it, when I sorrow most;
'Tis better to have loved and lost
Than never to have loved at all. ~ ~ Alfred Tennyson.

The Grand essentials of happiness are : something to do,
something to love, and something to hope for.
~ ~ ~ Allan K. Chalmers.

Enough already. Have a lovely day tomorrow and enjoy
the rest of the week. Take care of yourselves and each other.
Love and best wishes to you all. Cheers, Merle.

Post 340 ~ ~ ~ ~ Tuesday, 16th October, 2007.
<><><>


23 comments:

Gledwood said...

The happiness thing: yes that is too true.
Most people seem to think happiness=achieving all you ever aspired to.
That is actually the key to grotesque boredom, even depression.
There always has to be SOMETHING on the future horizon otherwise what hope is there to life?

Do you like my selfportrait Merle?

Susie said...

Thank you dear Merle for the award and your very kind words!!
Loved your blonde joke and the 24 things verse. Wise advice..
Have a wonderful day..
Thank you again for the award!
xo

Gledwood said...

In answer to your comment I'll tell you here as well...

No I've NOT ridden freight trains actually... though I've been SO tempted to jump on! That's an American thing... over here you get in BIG BIG trouble for doing that type of thing and there's no trainjumping "hobo" subculture like there is in the states for all that...

The Bullet Train... come on you DO know what that is Merle.. it's the

Japanese super express train. Goes about 180mph/300kph...

I have a teach yourself in Japanese... I was always pretty good at the accent so skimped on the CDs but I need to get them really at some future time...

I'm doing a tiny bit a day (as of yesterday!)

Lee said...

Thank you, Merle. You are most kind in your words and generous in your actions. :)

It must be tomato time...I just transplanted a few of my tomato plants from my vegie garden into poly-stryene boxes and placed them out on my patio area. I have so many plants coming up, I didn't want to waste them. I never buy the tomato plants. I throw out any tomatoes that get too ripe and just let nature take its course. I do that with my potatoes, onions, garlic...anything that sets out a shoot or budding eye...into the ground it goes! ;)

I did buy three hanging pots last week with ivy geraniums in them...to add to my little jungle out on the patio. ;)

audrey` said...

Dearest Merle

Congratulations!
Another award.
You deserve it, my dear friend.
Take care and much love =)

Lucy Stern said...

Here's my favorite one Merle: When God ordains, He sustains.

Lady Di Tn said...

Another good one. No wonder you get so many awards. I loved the pictures.
What were the names of your tomato?
Peace be with you dear one.

Granny said...

Thank you. I'll see if I can figure out how to get it on the sidebar. I've done it before; I can do it again.

Loved the joke about the absent minded ladies.

Joy Des Jardins said...

Loved the 24 Lines....

You're getting so many awards...you won't have room on your side bar lady....

Always love pics from your garden; but when did you put that new header picture up? It's wonderful. I guess I haven't been over to visit for a few days. Love it.

Take care sweet Merle.... Much love....

Peter said...

Hi Merle, thanks for the award, there are those that say "He's mad already" so the award wasn't necessary just to stop that.

T*mmy said...

*Big Grins* as I read through your jokes this morning.
You have such a way of brightening my day!
:)

Renie Burghardt said...

Hi Merle,

Congratulations on the beautiful award! You deserve it richly.

Your flowers are lovely, and another new one for me is the Genista shrub. Love the 24 beautiful lines, and have copied them. Thank you. Inspiration, fun, and good cheer are always plentiful here. Thank you, Merle.

Warmest regards,

Renie

Jim said...

Hi Merle -- Guess I'll start checking the fridge and go to bed, even though I'm not single.

I will post a picture of that Fairy Garden picture, maybe next week.

Cheers.
..

Jeanette said...

Hi Dear Merle. Congratulations on your awards and a big Thank you for awarding me the Fabulous award..I will use very soon.. great jokes once again and my favorite quote is.
" I hold it true, whate'er befall;
I feel it, when I sorrow most;
'Tis better to have loved and lost
Than never to have loved at all." ~ ~ Alfred Tennyson.
Take care dear Merle.

LZ Blogger said...

Merle - I just loved the Albert Schweitzer quotes. In fact... you may even see them on my blog posts in the future. I really like quotes that SPEAK TO ME and both of those do. Thx! ~ jb///

The Ramblin Irishman said...

It has been a while since I have taken the time to visit your blog and I am happy to see your humour is just as good as when I left. I do wish you and Jen would ease up a bit on the Irish although I know we make for good story telling. Have a nice day.

Mary said...

Merle,

The photos are awesome. Since it is fall here and has been windy, dark and deary, the photo lifted my spirits. Thanks for sharing and got a good laugh out of the jokes.

Mary

Christina said...

I love the new banner at the top of your blog! Good post, LOL @ highway 189.

Sometimes Saintly Nick said...

Congratulations, Merle. Well deserved.

I have a 25th line to add: “Never place a period where God has placed a comma.” ~ Gracie Allen (comedian & wife of George)

Puss-in-Boots said...

Hi Merle

Well, I'm back again and I've really missed reading your jokes and little homilies. I shall have to start from the beginning and catch up.

Have a lovely day, Merle. Hugs xoxo

Michele L. Tune said...

Merle,

You've created a simply magnificent post (as always!)

I loved the photos, the 24 lines, the quotes, and the jokes were a hoot.

Thanks so much for brightening up my day. You have a special way of bringing such joy and beauty to your readers!

Smiles & Blessings,
Michele

smilnsigh said...

Such a beautiful pink flower!

Mari-Nanci

Hootin'Anni said...

Trying to catch up with all that's been happening with you Merle. I've been busy this month handing out Halloween Treats from my blog comments. Do you do Halloween In Australia? Just curious.

Anyway, hope you're doing well....you always say that, but it's good to hear that YOU ARE!! Love all the garden flowers. And Mmmmmmm, home grown tomatoes!!! They can't be beat.