Saturday, June 21, 2008

The History of Aprons.

Post 469 ~ ~ ~ Saturday, 21st June, 2008.

Hello Everyone -- I hope you have had a good day,
as I have. My main frustration today was trying to
thread needles to shorten two pair of slacks. I must
have wasted half an hour, using various methods,
until I used some self-threading needles. You push
the thread down into the top of the needle (when
you can see the slot to push it into.) Finally I was
glad to get them done.

We have two birthdays today, 21st June. My nephew
Marcus and U.K. Bob. I hope both have had good days.

Tonight's story was sent by my friend of long standing
Barbara. Thank you Barbara - a good one.
The History of Aprons.

I don't think our kids know what an apron is.

The principal use of Grandma's apron was to protect
the dress underneath, but along with that, it served
as a potholder for removing hot pans from the oven.

It was wonderful for drying children's tears, and on
occasion was even used for cleaning out dirty ears.

From the chicken coop, the apron was used for carrying
eggs, fussy chicks, and sometimes half-hatched eggs
to be finished in the warming oven.

When company came, those aprons were ideal hiding
places for shy kids.

And when the weather was cold, Grandma wrapped
it around her arms.

Those big old aprons wiped many a perspiring brow,
bent over the hot wood stove.

Chips and kindling wood were brought into the
kitchen in that apron.

From the garden, it carried all sorts of vegetables.
After the peas had been shelled, it carried out
the hulls.

In the fall, the apron was used to bring in apples
that had fallen from the trees.

When unexpected company drove up the road, it
was surprising how much furniture that old apron
could dust in a matter of seconds.

When dinner was ready, Grandma walked out onto
the porch, waved her apron, and the men knew it
was time to come in from the fields to dinner.

It will be a long time before someone invents some-
thing that will replace that "old time apron" that
served so many purposes.

Pass this on to those who would know (and love) the
story about Grandma's aprons.

Grandma used to set her baked apple pies on the window
sill to cool.

Her granddaughters set theirs on the window to thaw.

They would go crazy now trying to figure out how many
germs were on that apron.

I don't think I ever caught anything from an apron ---
except love.

Two jokes from my friend Sandy Thanks Sandy.

A man is dining in a fancy restaurant and there is a
gorgeous redhead sitting at a near table. He has
been checking her out since he sat down, but lacks
the nerve to talk with her.

Suddenly she sneezes, and her glass eye comes flying
out of it's socket towards the man. He reflexively
reaches out, grabs it out of the air, and hands it back.
"Oh my, I am so sorry," the woman says as she pops
it back into pace.

"Let me buy your dinner to make it up to you," she says.

They enjoy a wonderful dinner together, and afterwards
they go to the theatre followed by drinks. They talk, they
laugh, she shares her deepest dreams, and he shares his.
She listens.

After paying for everything, she asks him if he would
like to come to her place for a night cap and stay for
breakfast. They had a wonderful, wonderful time.

The next morning she cooks a gourmet meal with all
the trimmings. The guy is amazed. Everything had
been SO incredible.
"You know," he said, "you are the perfect woman. Are
you this nice to every guy you meet?"

"No," she replies...
"You just happened to catch my eye."

The vasectomy.
A Kentucky couple, both bonified rednecks had nine
They went to the doctor to see about getting the
husband 'fixed.'

The doctor gladly started thr required procedure
and asked them what finally made them make the
decision . . .why after nine children, would they
choose to do this?

The husband replied that they had read in a recent
article that one out of every ten children being born
in the United States was Mexican, and they didn't
want to take a chance of having a Mexican baby
because neither of them spoke Spanish.

Foot-baller's wife: "I hate it when my husband
calls leftovers, replays."

TV executive's wife: My husband calls them "re-runs."

Mortician's wife: Be grateful. My husband refers to
them "remains."

A gold-miner died and went to Heaven. At the gate,
St Peter asked "What have you done with your life?"
When the man gave his occupation, St Peter
explained that there was already a surplus of miners
in Heaven.

"May I stay if I get rid of the others?"the miner asked.

St Peter agreed Once in, the miner wandered around
until he saw a couple of familiar faces. He whispered
that there was a gold strike in Hell. Soon the place was
empty of miners.

But a while later, the miner asked St Peter for permission
to keave. "Even if I did start the rumour," he said,"There
just might be something to it."

A man played golf every Saturday and always
got home about 2:00 in the afternoon. One
Saturday, however he rushed in at 7:00 pm.
and blurted to his wife, "I left the course at the
normal time, but on the way home, I stopped to
change a tyre for a young woman. she offered
to buy me a drink, one thing led to another, and
we spent the afternoon in a motel. I'm so sorry,
I'll never do it again."

"Don't give me that malarkey," the angry wife
shouted. "You played 36 holes, didn't you ?"

Boss to Secretary : "Put this notice up on the clock.
I want to make sure everyone sees it.

A woman was losing at the roulette wheel. When she
was down th her last bet, she asked the fellow for a
good number

"Why don't you play your age?" he suggested.
The woman agreed, and then put on her money on the
table. The next thing the fellow with the advice knew,
the woman had fainted, and fallen to the floor.

He rushed right over, "Did she win?" he asked.
"No," replied the attendant. "She put her money on
29 and 41 came in.
Just a few quotes ~ ~ ~

Grow old along with me, the best is yet to be.
~ ~ Robert Browning.

Age doesn't always bring wisdom, Sometimes
age comes alone. ~ ~ Unknown.

The hardest years are between 10 and 70.
~ ~ ~ Helen Hayes. 74.

Time to call it a day, my friends. Stay well and
enjoy your lives. Love and Best Wishes to you all.
Cheers, Merle.

Post 469 ~ ~ Saturday, 21st June, 2008.


Old Lady Lincoln said...

Dear Merle, once again you have an assortment of some funny jokes. I also like the line in the apron post, I don't think I ever caught anything from an apron ---except love. Isn't that the truth. Sometimes when my Grandma and I were sitting outside on her swing and the air was getting chilly, she would pull me closer and flip the end of her apron around me. Have a great evening and a wonderful Sunday. Your blogging friend, Patty

Sometimes Saintly Nick said...

Merle, I am reminded that I have an apron in a drawer in my kitchen that I only wear when I grill out on my deck. It’s been a very long times since I have grilled out on my deck.

Renie Burghardt said...

Dear Merle,

Oh, my, I have trouble threading a needle as well! You think it could my eyes? LOL.

My grandma used to always wear an apron as well. Funny, but we never worried about germs in the good old days. Maybe they weren't as strong. Perhaps today's germs are super germs! And they seem to be everywhere and on everything. LOL.

The glass eye story is funny, as is the one about Mexican children.

I thoroughly enjoyed all the funnies, and the quotes are always good. And we hope that old age comes with wisdom and not alone! That's too sad to contemplate!

Well, I have to get ready for church soon. We are having beautiful weather here. I hope your weather isn't too cold. Have a wonderful week, dear friend.

Love and blessings,


Lady Di Tn said...

As I read each line, I could see Grandma Christian doing all those things. She was a rather large woman(width not height) so her aprons were huge with a pocket on either side. Thanks for taking me down memory lane. The jokes were really funny and I always enjoy the quotes. Peace my friend.

Anonymous said...

Hi Dear Merle.
Thanks so much for your comments,
great jokes as usual.
The Apron brought back many memories of Mum's cooking Sundays.
Stay well will see you soon xx
Love Gwen.

Puss-in-Boots said...

Just caught my! I like that.

I rather agree with Helen Hayes about the hardest years being between 10 and 70. I've made mine hard all by myself...aren't I clever?

Hope all is well with you and yours, Merle.


Janice said...

Hi Merle,

Sorry I haven't been around much I've been a bit buzy.

I read the apron before but loved it and didn't mind reading it again.

Caught my eye was funny.


Jeanette said...

Hi Dear Merle.
Great post, I have seen the Apron before many memories of Mum in her apron. I only use one when cooking but Pauline takes after Mum and put a clean apron on soon as she is dressed,,,Great jokes the wonen at the roulette wheel got my vote tonight... Take care dear Merle keep warm hope to see you soon...

Dave said...

Excellent post as always Merle... sure brightens my morning to come here and read your words and jokes! *S*

MarmiteToasty said...

Hi - I popped over from Saintly's blob..and oh my, what a lovely blob you have here.....

I actually have aprons lol.... and all the nippers in my care also wear them when I do baking with them....


audrey` said...

The 2 jokes from Sandy are so funny =)