Saturday, July 19, 2008

Benny : The Man on the Bus.

Post 483 ~~~ Saturday, 19th July, 2008.

Hello my friends ~~ I hope you are all doing
well and enjoying your lives. Have a great
weekend. It is Saturday night here, so mine
is half over, and so far it has been great.

Update on Olive's Blob. I have corrected
the address for Olive, as was pointed out by
my friend Nancy. Thank you so much Nancy.
I had been leaving off the au/ at the end.

Geoff and Jo arrived last evening with the
load of wood they had bought for their wood
heater, and after backing it into my driveway
we had our steak dinners which we all enjoyed
after some hot soup.

This morning, Geoff looked for jobs and got
stuck into them. In fact it wasn't easy getting
him to come inside for our dinner. We had
yummy pea and ham soup, again and this
time a nice roast chicken meal etc.

They left about 2 .30 and my idea was to watch
a couple of football matches ~ But, I went to
sleep didn't I? This supervising is hard work !!

My team play tomorrow, so I am glad I didn't
miss that match. Glad your team won, Jan. and
they are well up on the ladder, all of a sudden.

I do not know why some of you people cannot
open Olive's blog, as I can any time. I showed
it to Geoff and Jo today. The day or so after she
died on the 12th July, I got the notice that it had
been removed but happily it is there again.
I think Mike has more of Olive's story to tell, so
I hope you can see it, if you are interested.

The story that amazed me the most was when
she was 30 ~ (78 years ago) she had a toothache
and went to the dentist and said, "I can't keep
coming back for each tooth, take them all out."
This was before there were anesthetics, and Olive
said she fainted twice during the ordeal. Foolishly
Mike asked, "Did it hurt much, Ollie?" That lady
snapped back, "I told you I fainted twice, didn't I?"

And amazingly, another dentist heard her story and
made her a free set of teeth, which would you believe
lasted her all her life. They don't make them as well
nowadays. http://allaboutolive.blogspot.com.au/ or
maybe you could try from my Aussie blogroll list.

Tonight I have a nice story which is called - -
Benny: The Man on the Bus.

This is a parable about leadership.

A teacher assigned her 12th graders an essay about
a leader they admired. Most kids wrote about
famous people, but one student turned in this one.

Benny: The Man on the Bus.

I've been taking a public bus to school for years.
Most passengers go to work and never talk to
anyone else.

About a year ago, an elderly man got on the bus
and said loudly to the driver, "Good morning."
Most people looked up annoyed, and the bus
driver just grunted.

The next day, the man got on at the same stop
and said loudly, "Good morning." to the driver.

On the fifth day, the driver greeted the man first
with a cheerful "Good morning." and Benny
replied loudly, "My name is Benny, What's yours?"
The driver said his name was Ralph.

That was the first time any of us had heard the
driver's name. Soon all the passengers began
talking to each other and saying hello to Ralph
and Benny.

After a month, Benny extended his cheerful
greeting to the whole bus. Within a few days, his
"Good morning" was returned by a whole bunch of
"Good mornings." The entire bus seemed
friendlier.

If a leader is someone who makes some-
thing happen, Benny was our leader in friendliness.

A month ago, Benny didn't get on the bus. Some
of us thought he had died. No one knew what to do.
The bus got quiet again.

So I started to act like Benny, by saying "Good
morning" to everyone, and they cheered up again.
I guess I'm now the leader.
<><>

Time for some jokes ~~

Final words.
The talk show host said, "OK, all the men who
are heads of their households, stand on one side
and all the men whose wives are head of the
households stand on the other side."

The line where women were the heads stretched
out for miles, but there was only one man standing
in the line where men were the heads. The talk
show host talked about how proud he was of this
man and asked him what his secret was


The man replied, "I don't know, my wife
told me to stand in this line.
<><>
One from my friend Lady Di Thank you.

A woman was sitting at a bar enjoying an after
work cocktail with her girlfriends when an
exceptionally tall, handsome, extremely sexy,
middle-aged man ebtered. He was so striking
that the woman couldn't take her eyes off him.

The young -at- heart man noticed her overly
attentive stare and walked towards her. (As all
men will.) Before she could offer her apologies
for staring so rudely, he leaned over and
whispered to her, "I'll do anything, absolutely
anything that you want me to do, no matter
how kinky, for $20.00 on one condition."

Flabbergasted, the woman asked what the
condition was. The man replied, "You have to
tell me what you want in just three words."

The woman considered his proposition for a
moment, and then slowly removed a $20 bill
from her purse, which she gave to him along
with her address.

She looked deeply into his eyes, and slowly
and meaningful said . . ."Clean my House."
<><>

Another from Lady Di. Thank you Dianne.

A Wise Little Feller in West Texas.
Barack Obama, the Presidential Democratic
Party candidate, is for banning all guns in
America. He is considered just a little self-
righteous.

At a recent rural elementary school assembly
in West Texas, he asked the audience for
total qiet. Then in the silence, he started to
slowly clap his hands once every few seconds,
holding the audience in total sience.

Then he said into the microphone, "Children,
every time I clap my hands together, a child
dies in America from gun violence.

Then little Bobby Earl, with a proud Texas drawl,
pierced the quiet and said, "Well, dumb-ass,
stop clapping.
<><>

A few Classified Ads, sent by my friend Jim.
Thank you Jim.

Free Yorkshire Terrier -- 8 years old.
Hateful little bastard. Bites.

Free Puppies.
Half cocker spaniel, Half neighbor's sneaky dog.

Free Puppies -- Mother, AKC German Shepherd
Father, Super Dog . . able to jump tall fences in
a single bound.

Georgia Peaches ~ California grown 89 cents lb.

Joining Nudist Colony -
Must sell washer and dryer $300.

Wedding Dress for Sale - Worn once by mistake.
Call Stephanie.

And the best one: For sale by owner.

Complete set of Encyclopedia Britannica,
45 Volumes. Excelent condition. $1,000 or
best offer. No longer needed, Got married
last month. Wife knows everything.
<><>

A policeman is walking down the street when
he sees a man with a brick tied to a dog leash.
He decides to go and humor him. He walks up
to the man and says, "Hello sir, I like your dog."

The man looks at the brick, then the policeman
and says, "It's not a dog, it's a brick."
The policeman replies, "Oh, sorry, I thought you
were a bit mad," and walks off a little puzzled.

Once the policeman is out of sight, the man turns
to the brick and says, "That fooled him, didn't it
Rover?"
<><>

One rainy afternoon, a kindergarten teacher saw
that one of the children was having a lot of trouble
putting his gumboots on, and was going to be late
for his bus, so she went to help him.

But even with her pushing the gumboots and he
pushing his feet, those gumboots didn't want to go on.

When the second gumboot was finally on,
the teacher had worked up a sweat and amost swore
when the litte boy said, "Teacher, these are on the
wrong feet." She looked down and sure enough
they were, It wasn't any easier pulling the boots off
than it was putting them on, but the teacher managed
to keep her cool as, together, they worked to get the
gumboots back on --this time on the right feet.

Then the boy announced, "Anyway, these aren't my
gumboots." The teacher bit her tongue and held
back the desire to scream, "Why didn't you say so?"
right in his face. Once again, she struggled to help
him pull the ill-fitting gumboots off.

"So, whose boots are they?" she asked once they had
succeeded in removing the gumboots.
"They're my brothers," the boy said, but Mummy
makes me wear them."

Not knowing whether she should laugh or cry, the
teacher mustered up the grace to wresle the boots
on his feet again.

"Now," she said, Where are your mittens?"
The boy thought for a bit and then said, "After I
took them off this morning, I stuffed them in
my gumboots."
<> btw gumboots are waterproof boots like
Wellingtons.
<><>

On the eve of a long overseas business trip, a man
leaves his cat with his brother. Two days before
he's to return home, he phones his brother from
overseas. "So, how's my cat doing?" he asks his
brother?"

His brother says, "It's dead."
"My cat's dead?" the man says. "What do you
mean, It's dead? I loved that cat. Couldn't you
think of a nicer way to tell me? You could have
let me down a little easier-- broke it to me by
degrees. You could have told
me that she got
out of the house yesterday. Then when I call
before I leave for the airport, you could tell me
you found her, but she's up on the roof and
you're having trouble getting her down.

Then you could tell me before I get on the plane,
that the fire department scared her and she fell
off the roof and died when she hit the ground.

"I'm sorry," the brother said, You're right, it was
insensitive of me. I won't let it happen again."

"All right," the man says, "Forget about it.
Anyway, how is Mum?"

"Well," said the brother, " she's up on the roof
and we are having trouble getting her down.
<><>

That is enough for tonight, my friends. I hope
you enjoyed some of this post. Take care and
be happy. Share some smiles around.
Love and Best Wishes to you all. Cheers, Merle.

Post 483 ~ ~ ~ Saturday, 19th July, 2008.
<><><>


<><>

19 comments:

Gledwood said...

Hi Merle
I was going to ask you whether you knew about Olive passing on... but thought you probably would already, as I see...
I only heard from BBC Radio 4 of all places ~ ie major national radio news show ~ ... it's a bit odd to hear of the death of an acquaintance that way...
... hope all's OK with you otherwise Merle, take care
XX

Lady Di Tn said...

Merle
Thanks for sharing the jokes I sent. I loved the story about Benny on the Bus. Mimi is better and even insisted on doing her one load of laundry all by herself. Her determination sees her through. Glad you had a good visit. Peace

Patty said...

Glad you had a nice visit with your family. Sounds like you had some good meals.

Liked the one about the man's cat dying and how he thought he should have been told, then when asked about their Mother the brother said she's up on the roof and we can't get her down.

Sleep well my friend.

Deborah Wilson said...

Yorkshire Terrier:
sounds like my late uncle Roy's dog!

lol

Nancy said...

Hi Merle,

I finally figured out why some of us couldn't open Olive's blog. The web address you posted on your post was lacking the .au/ after the word com at the end. This is the wrong one: http://allaboutolive.blogspot.com/

No problem once I accessed it through your Aussie blogroll, and below is the web address that popped up.
The one I am using to access her blog now is:
http://www.allaboutolive.com.au/

Just thought this may help others access her blog.

(((((( HUGS ))))))

Puss-in-Boots said...

Hi Merle. That was a nice one about Benny. Reminds me when I used to catch the bus to work. As it was a very small local route, we all knew each other and every morning, especially, was spent chatting away about what we were doing, going to do, etc. It was a rather pleasant way to start the day.

BTW...I'm coming for dinner at your place one day, all those lovely meals you cook make my mouth water...lol!

Hugs.

linda may said...

G'Day Merle,
You sound like you are likeme and love feeding everyone when they come for a visit.
Thank you for your comments.
There should be more Bennies in the world.
I liked the adverts.

Renie Burghardt said...

Dear Merle,

I am glad you had a good visit with Geoff and Jo and , you certainly prepared some delicious sounding food. I know all about supervising, dear Merle, and you are right, it is hard work. LOL. Speaking of sons, my older son and granddaughter arrive today, and younger son Greg is already here, so it will be nice to have both of them here together for a few days.

Benny: The Man on the Bus was a good story. Cheerful people can make such a difference.

Funny story about the head of household guy. And funnier still about the woman and the handsome guy. She made a good bargain for 20 dollars. Hahaha. And I enjoyed the ads, especially the Encyclopedia Britannica one. And the gumboots story was so funny, too. They were all funny as usual.

So, I start my Sunday in a cheerful mood, dear Merle, after my visit with you. Sorry I am a little late, but I made it. Have a wonderful week.

Love and blessings,

Renie

By the way, Connie's gifts were so lovely, especially the orchid.

Jeanette said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Jeanette said...

Jeanette said...
Hi Dear Merle,that was me above... Lovely of Geoff to find a few jobs that needed doing but I must say supervising is a very tiring job. and the meals you served sound so yummy..Great Jokes.. and love Bennies story Pity there werent more people in the world like him..I can also get into Olive's blog.

SSHHHH Its Gwens birthday im just about to post about it...

Bear Naked said...

The story of the gumboots was so cute.
Poor teacher.

Bear((( )))

Mountain Mama said...

Hi Merle. How nice that y0ou have had company to cook for. It sounds like you all had a wonderful feast.

Love the jokes, especially the Obama one. Hee-hee-hee!
I sent it to some family & friends.

I suppose you are beginning a new week since it is my Sunday Morning. My-my-my, just think, you are on the other side of the world and still you can get this message so quickly!!! Who would have ever thought!
God bless you and yours,
Love, Hugs & prayers.

Rosezilla (Tracie Walker) said...

Thanks Merle - loved the one about the Bus guy. Kids so often learn from simpler examples than we realize. I also liked the one with the teacher and the little boy with the boots. Kids also try our patience unmercifully sometimes!

Gigi Ann said...

Hello Merle,

I enjoyed your jokes, they made me chuckle.

Have a nice week;)

Nancy said...

Hi Merle,

It's me.....AGAIN! LOL

I just wanted to let you know that I have started reading Olive's "blob" (bless her soul) and am loving every minute of it! I am going to try and read a couple of her posts every night. I have read the first 6 posts so far. I started at the very beginning. Thanks for pointing me to her blog! She was a delightful and charming lady!!!

(((((( HUGS ))))))
Nancy

Jim said...

Hi Merle, I'm glad you liked John's jokes. He is my old car (Ford) friend.

How is Mum getting off the roof? This was all bad news wasn't it!

It is nice that you are having a nice weekend with son and DIL. We has a Saturday afternoon and evening with our Daughter, Karen. It was her birthday.
All her brothers and sister (4) and their spouses or friend were there also. And her brother-in-law and his wife and two children also attended, along with our friend, Sue, from Idaho.
..

Dave said...

Good post as always Merle!

I found the same thing about Olive's blog.. there's no "blogspot" in it.

Have a wonderful day!

Hootin Anni said...

Dave, Jeff, and Sandy....what a hoot! I laughed so hard.

I hope you're enjoying your day Merle!!

audrey` said...

Ouch!!!
Olive took out all her teeth...
It's very painful.
She had a very fruitful life.