Wednesday, July 23, 2008

Help Yourself to Happiness.

Post 485 ~ ~ ~ Wednesday, 23rd July, 2008.

Hello again Everyone ~~ I hope all is well with
you and life is treating you well. I can't complain
although it has been very cold at night- Minus 1 C
which is very low 30s F. After a Frost, we get a nice
day, so guess that works OK.

I have been cooking today, a lovely chicken in the
microwave and heaps of vegetables, so can have a
break for a while now. When I buy a microwave
chicken, I usually cook it the same day and do the
veggies the next day.

Today is the birthday of Kali from Tasmania. I hope
you have had a lovely day today.
http://vintagehouseholdtas.blogspot.com/
It is also Lucy Stern and her husband's 35th
wedding anniversary. Congrats to you both. Hope
it is a great day for you both.

Finally the correct address for Olive is as follows -
http://www.allaboutolive.com.au/
Sorry I had it wrong, and it is worth looking at.

Another Poem from Helen Steiner Rice, called
Help Yourself to Happiness.

Everybody, everywhere seeks happiness it's true,
But finding it and keeping it seems difficult to do,
Difficult because we think happiness is found
Only in the places where wealth and fame abound - -

And so we go on searching in "palaces of pleasure"
Seeking recognition and monetary treasure.
Unaware that happiness is "just a state of mind"
Within the reach of everyone who takes time to
be kind- - -

For in making others happy we will be happy too,
For the happiness you give away returns to "shine
on you."
<><>

What do you call a woman who knows where her
husband is every night? A widow.

A woman's husband has been slipping in and out
of a coma for several months, yet she stayed by
his bedside every single day. One day, when he
regains consciousness, he motions for her to move
nearer.

As she sits by him, he whispers, eyes full of tears,
"You have been with me through all the bad times.
When I was fired, you stood by me.When my
business failed, you were there. When I got shot,
you were by my side.

When we lost the house, you stayed right there.
When my heart started failing, you were still
by my side. . . . .You know what ?"

"What dear," she gently asks, smiling as her
heart begins to fill with warmth.

He looks deeply into her eyes and says, "I;m
beginning to think you are bad luck."
<><>

Then there's the story of the pilot who, walking
through the cabin during a flight from Karachi
to Paris, noticed a blind passenger with his guide-
dog. Being an animal lover, he asked the man if
he would like him to take the dog for a little walk
along the runway when they landed in Athens.
The offer was gladly accepted.

It was a very hot day, with not a cloud in the sky.
The pilot found the glare too much so he put on
his dark glasses and walked a few hundred yards
and then back to the plane with the dog on a lead.

A new batch of passengers was about to board
the aircraft. Seeing the pilot with the guide-dog,
they stopped dead in their tracks, dismay on their
faces. Then they turned and went back to the
terminal building to ask if they could change their
tickets for another airline.
<><>
A woman visited the bank to close her account
because she was convinced the institute was
going under.

Asked by a startled bank manager why she
thought so, she produced one of her cheques,
endorsed by the bank, "Insufficient Funds."
<><>

"I went to a book shop today," says comic
Brian Kiley, and I asked the manager where
the self help books were.

She said, " If I told you, that would defeat the
whole purpose."
<><>

A man called his doctor for an appointment.
"I'm sorry," said the receptionist, we can't fit
you in for at least two weeks."
"But I could be dead by then."

"No problem. If your wife lets us know, we'll
cancel the appointment."
<><>

George Burns punctuated this story with the flick
of hiss cigar. A woman said to me, "is it true
that you still go out with young girls?"

I said, "Yes, It's true."
She said, "Is it true that you still smoke 15 to 20
cigars a day??" .
I said yes, it's true.
She said, "Is it true that you still take a few drinks
every day?" I said, Yes, it's true."

She said, "What does your doctor say?"
I said, "He's dead."
<><>

The drunk was trying to fit his door key into
a street lamp as the policeman approached.

"I don't think there is anybody at home, sir,"
remarked the policeman.

"Must be officer," slurred the drunk, "The
light's on upstairs."

"What's the matter with you Lad?"
"Typhoid fever, Sergeant."
"That illness either kills you or leaves you
an idiot. I know, because I've had it."
<><>

Time to call it a night and go get some sleep,
Look after each other and yourselves.
Love and best wishes, my friends
Cheers, Merle.

Post 485 ~ ~ Wednesday, 23rd July, 2008.
<><><>





15 comments:

Rosezilla said...

These are great, Merle! The one about the airline pilot walking the dog reminds me of one I heard - "Why don't blind people sky dive? It scares the dog!"

Jeanette said...

Hi Dear Merle, Another Lovely poem.
Great jokes. Great minds think alike. ive posted a simlar one yesterday about the blind pilot.
Hope you had your electic blanket on last night BRRR -2c but a beautiful sunny day today.
keep warm Merle Love Janxxx

Gramma Ann said...

Oh! you must be having winter, while we are having summer. It was a beautiful day here in Iowa, USA. The temperature was around 80 degrees F.

Enjoyed your jokes, and always enjoyed George Burns. He was a funny guy.

Have a great tonight or tomorrow, which ever it is there;))

Nancy said...

We hit 102 here on Monday! It's been a hot summer in the South! Looking forward to Fall already! Won't be long!

Helen Steiner Rice is hard to beat, isn't she? Beautiful!

(((((( HUGS ))))))

mreddie said...

We could use a little of that coolness around here, it was 100F yesterday and in the 90s today. The cooking sounds good, I do like my veggies. We had a rotisserie chicken and some veggies for late lunch today - was yummy! ec

Lady Di Tn said...

Merle
The poem and jokes were good ones. I usually save your post to read last as it makes me smile and prepares me for the day. Thank you. Peace

Old Lady Lincoln said...

Good morning Merle,
Have a question, what is a microwave chicken? Is it partly cooked? I know somethings that are fixed in the microwave don't turn out to well. The one I have now is mostly for warming items, or cooking frozen veggies.

Liked the George Burns story. Have a great evening.
Love,
Patty

CIELO said...

Good morning, Merle.... I'm mentioning you on my post, today... Thank you again for letting me using your amazing "praying" photograph....

Hugs

Cielo

CIELO said...

Hi again, sweet Merle! Came back to let you know that I've decided to post that picture tomorrow, rather than today.... but it'll be there with your link... :)

Hugs

cielo

Steven said...

here's what's so nice lady said di tn "The poem and jokes were good ones," I want to say - and I greeting for you

Jim said...

Hi Merle, you might like some of our hot weather again. Just not what is going on in the Texas Valley though. We had light rain for a day out of it, the sun is out this afternoon.

I don't know how to cook chicken in the microwave, for the longest time I wouldn't cook hot dogs in there either. I always boiled them.

George Burns was alright, I hardly ever missed his radio show. I liked the TV one also, with "say the magic word" and the duck or chicken popping out on a stick.
Cheers,
..

LZ Blogger said...

Merle ~ 30ยบ F... now that's pretty COOL! (pun intended!) ~ jb///

Puss-in-Boots said...

I laughed out loud at the joke about insufficient funds...the bank going bust...lol!

You're at that yummy cooking again...I know, I can smell it from here!

Have a lovely weekend, Merle, and keep your tootsies warm at night.

Hugs.

Dave said...

As always Merle, your post brought a smile to my day!!! *S*

audrey` said...

I love the title "Help Yourself To Happiness".
It sums it all so well and accurately =)