Sunday, July 01, 2012

How to Stay Young.

Post   789  ~ ~ ~ Sunday  1st  July,  2012.

Hello my friends ~~ It is nice to be with you all again, but it is a very dreary day here with rain every now and then,  A bit different to those of you in the Northern Henisphere, where
I hear there are high temperatures.  I really feel for all those affected by the horrible fires in Colorado.  So many homes and fears of further loss of life and so many fire-fighters trying
so hard to contain them.  My prayers for everyone who live in the area and the brave men doing the best they can as well as risking their own lives. Fires really terrify me, as I am sure that I am not the only one .

Well I hope all is well with all my blogging friends and that life is good for you. I am still doing well and had a check-up at the doctor the other day.  He was happy I had gained some weight - about 3 kg which made me 54 kilos - fully dressed with lots of clothes on.
My blood pressure was a bit too low, and my heart rate was a bit slow. However, while I feel well and comfortable I just keep on keeping on, as I can't do anything about those things.
It doesn't help to worry, so I refuse to.

The first item was sent to me by my lovely special friend Ann, so Thank you so much.

HOW TO STAY YOUNG


1.  Try everything twice.
On one woman's tombstone she said she wanted this epitaph:
"Tried everything twice.. Loved it both times!"
 

2.  Keep only cheerful friends.
The grouches pull you down.

(Keep this in mind if you are one of those grouches!)

 3. Keep learning: 
Learn more about the computer, crafts, gardening, whatever...
 
Never let the brain get idle.
  'An idle mind is the devil's workshop.'
And the devil's name is Alzheimer's!
 

4. Enjoy the simple things.

 5. Laugh often, long and loud.
Laugh until you gasp for breath.
 
And if you have a friend who makes you laugh,
 
spend lots and lots of time with HIM/HER.

 
6.. The tears happen:
Endure, grieve, and move on.
The only person who is with us our entire life, is ourselves.
LIVE while you are alive.

7. Surround yourself with what you love:
Whether it's family, pets, keepsakes, music, plants, hobbies, whatever..
 
Your home is your refuge.
 

8. Cherish your health:
If it is good, preserve it.
 
If it is unstable, improve it.
 
If it is beyond what you can improve, get help.
 
9. Don't take guilt trips..
Take a trip to the mall, even to the next county, 
to a foreign country, but NOT to where the guilt is.
10. Tell the people  that they are special to you, at every opportunity.
 You are my special friend

11. Forgive now those who made you cry. You might not get a second chance..

 Do share this with someone.
Remember! Lost time can never be found.

Be kinder than necessary, for everyone you meet is fighting some kind of battle. 
<><><>
MONDAY
The mother of a 17-year-old girl was concerned that her daughter was having sex...
Worried the girl might become pregnant and adversely impact the family's status, she consulted the family doctor.
The doctor told her that teenagers today were very willful and any attempt to stop the girl would probably result in rebellion. He then told her to arrange for her daughter to be put on birth control and until then, talk to her and give her a box of condoms.
Later that evening, as her daughter was preparing for a date, the mother told her about the situation and handed her a box of condoms.
The girl burst out laughing and reached over to hug her mother, saying,
'Oh Mom! You don't have to worry about that! I'm dating Susan!'
TUESDAY
A man went to church one day and afterward he stopped to shake the preacher's hand. He said, 'Preacher, I'll tell you, that was a damned fine sermon. Damned good!'
The preacher said, 'Thank you sir, but I'd rather you didn't use profanity.'
The man said, 'I was so damned impressed with that sermon I put five thousand dollars in the offering plate!'
The preacher said, 'No shit?'
WEDNESDAY
Brenda and Steve took their six-year-old son to the doctor.
With some hesitation, they explained that although their little angel appeared to be in good health, they were concerned about his rather small penis.
After examining the child, the doctor confidently declared, 'Just feed him pancakes. That should solve the problem.'
The next morning when the boy arrived at breakfast, there was a large stack of warm pancakes in the middle of the table.
'Gee, Mom,' he exclaimed. 'For me?'

'Just take two,' Brenda replied. 'The rest are for your father.'
THURSDAY
One night, an 87-year-old woman came home from Bingo to find her 92-year-old husband in bed with another woman. She became violent and ended up pushing him off the balcony of their 20th floor apartment, killing him instantly. Brought before the court, on the charge of murder, she was asked if she had anything to say in her own defense.
'Your Honor,' she began coolly, 'I figured that at 92, if he could screw, he could fly.'
FRIDAY
A Doctor was addressing a large audience in Tampa . 'The material we put into our stomachs is enough to have killed most of us sitting here, years ago. Red meat is awful. Soft drinks corrode your stomach lining. Chinese food is loaded with MSG. High fat diets can be disastrous, and none of us realizes the long-term harm caused by the germs in our drinking water. However, there is one thing that is the most dangerous of all and we all have eaten, or will eat it. Can anyone here tell me what food it is that causes the most grief and suffering for years after eating it?'
After several seconds of quiet, a 75-year-old man in the front row raised his hand, and softly said, 'Wedding Cake.'
SATURDAY
Bob, a 70-year-old, extremely wealthy widower, shows up at the Country Club with a breathtakingly beautiful and very sexy 25-year-old blonde-haired woman who knocks everyone's socks off with her youthful sex appeal and charm and who hangs over Bob's arm and listens intently to his every word. His buddies at the club are all aghast. At the very first chance, they corner him and ask, 'Bob, how'd you get the trophy girlfriend?' Bob replies, 'Girlfriend? She's my wife!' They are knocked over, but continue to ask. 'So, how'd you persuade her to marry you?' 'I lied about my age', Bob replies. 'What, did you tell her you were only 50?'
Bob smiles and says, 'No, I told her I was 90.'
SUNDAY
Groups of Americans were traveling by tour bus through Holland .. As they stopped at a cheese farm, a young guide led them through the process of cheese making, explaining that goat's milk was used. She showed the group a lovely hillside where many goats were grazing. 'These' she explained, 'Are the older goats put out to pasture when they no longer produce.' She then asked, 'What do you do in America with your old goats?'
A spry old gentleman answered, 'They send us on bus tours!








Well it would be nice to get rid of these spaces - I am so sorry. When it says delete I am 
http://www2l.incredimail.com/gcontent/stamps/new2011/pixel.gif?upn=603699400591488035

scared to click on it as it tends to delete the whole item.


My Queensland friend Lee sent me the next one.  Thank you Lee.
PREGNANT AT 61
A woman went to the doctor's office where she was seen by one of the younger doctors. After about four minutes in the examination room, she burst out screaming as she ran down the hall. An older doctor stopped her and asked what the problem was, and she told him her story. After listening, he had her sit down and relax in another room. The older doctor marched down  the hallway back to where the young doctor was writing on his clipboard. "What's the matter with you?" the older doctor demanded. "Mrs. Terry is 61 years old, has four grown children and seven grandchildren, and you told her she was pregnant?"
The younger doctor continued writing and without looking up said, "Does she still have the hiccups?"
<><><>

Another from Linda.  Good one Linda. Thank you.
TRY IT !  New technology is so amazing !


I thought that Google Earth was good, but this is even more precise. Check this out, pretty scary to know they can find you anywhere. I'm not surprised to learn that such technology exists. It uses your IP address and finds the exact location of any Internet user in seconds. It uses a sophisticated time based algorithm to do so.

Try it and find your PRECISE location on the earth, then watch your screen as the system briefly analyzes your data...then displays your PRECISE location. Your location will pop up in a new window in about 10 seconds or so.

Click on the link below......

http://www.darnay.com/iec/features/locator/index.html
<><>

I will finish this post with the most dangerous recipe.
 5 Minute Chocolate Mug Cake.

1 EXTRA large coffee mug. 
4 tablespoons flour
4 tablespoons sugar
2 tablespoons cocoa
1 egg
3 tablespoons milk
3 tablespoons oil
3 tablespoons chocolate chips (optional)
a small splash of vanilla.

Add dry ingredients to mug, and mix well.
Add the egg and mix thoroughly
Pour in the milk and oil and mix well.
Add the chocolate chips (if using) and vanilla
and mix again.

Put your mug in the microwave and cook for 3 minutes 
at 1000 watts high.
The cake will rise above the mug, but don't be alarmed.
Allow to cool a little and tip onto a plate if desired. EAT.
(This can serve 2 if you want to feel slightly more virtuous).
And why is this the most dangerous cake recipe??
Because now we are all only 5 minutes away from
chocolate cake at any time of the day and night!!!
<><><>

Well time to say Bye for now dear friends, and I hope to
be with you again next Sunday.  Can you believe we are into the second half of the year already?  
Take good care of yourselves and each other.
My love and best wishes to you all. Cheers, Merle.

Post  789  ~ ~ ~  Sunday,  1st  July, 2012.
<><><>
 

7 comments:

Granny Annie said...

As you first commenter let me tell you that you left out 2 Tbs of cocoa in your chocolate cake recipe. I make this all the time and it is delicious. While the choc chips are optional the cocoa is mandatory:)

Every little bit of this post was great and I so look forward to your Sunday smiles:)

jel said...

them were some good ones

glad ya are doing good!


it is very HOT here!

ya take care
huggs

Lady Di Tn said...

Have you made the cake yet? The jokes were so funny and really started my Monday off great. Thanks for sharing the laughter. Glad to hear you are doing well and your attitude about worrying is Priceless. We are to have another 3 digit day today and the last 4 we have broken 140 year records. Whew it is HOT outside. The newspaper announced this morning in the headlines that we were in a Drought. All you have to do is look at the brown grass and fields to know this without having to read the headlines. Peace

Gina E. said...

Guess who is getting pancakes for breakfast for a week? LOL LOL!

Peter said...

Hi Merle, if you are having trouble with a blog post............
COPY it to a word document, FIX it there, DELETE your original post then PASTE your ammended copy to your blog

Bethany said...

great to see you are still blogging.a lot of my contacts have dropped off. I did too for quite a while

audrey` said...

"How To Stay Young?" is very informative. Thank you so much for sharing it with us, Merle :)