Sunday, November 04, 2012

Got It Too Easy.

Post   807  ~ ~ ~ Sunday,  4th  November,  2012.

Hello My Friends ~ ~  It is good to "see" you again and I trust all is well with you all and life is good for you and your loved ones. I am fine, just still sleeping a lot in the daytime, but I go to bed late.  There is no pain when I sleep, so it goes.  I get the usual things done, cooking, washing and dishes etc, just nothing extra.  I am going to get more help, so that is great. Now get 1.5 hours a week instead of fortnightly.  Plus the shopping for 2 hours as usual and one hour the next week which will be good for anything I forgot, or run out of.
Last week I had my hair cut and it looks much better and my carer helped me up the steps and inside, then got me some stamps and magazines which she read while I got trimmed.

Also a ramp outside has finally been granted and I hope will be done soon. That is going to be wonderful and should relieve quite a bit of pain that I have on the steep ramp I have.  I cannot believe the wonderful help that Veteran's Affairs have been to me -paying all
hospital accounts and operations etc etc and now the ramp. I am very grateful.

Well I had better get started on this post, which I hope you will enjoy. First item tonight
is the Title of the post -- "Got it too Easy."

Got It Too Easy! ================ When I was a kid adults used to bore me to tears with their tedious diatribes about how hard things were when they were growing up. What with walking twenty-five miles to school every morning uphill both ways through year 'round blizzards carrying their younger siblings on their backs to their one-room schoolhouse where they maintained a straight-A average despite their full- time after-school job at the local textile mill where they worked for 35 cents an hour just to help keep their family from starving to death!

 And I remember promising myself that when I grew up there was no way I was going to lay that on kids about how hard I had it and how easy they've got it! But.... Now that I've reached the ripe old age of thirty, I can't help but look around and notice the youth of today. You've got it so easy! I mean, compared to my childhood, you live in a Utopia! And I hate to say it but you kids today don't know how good you've got it!

 I mean, when I was a kid we didn't have the Internet. If we wanted to know something, we had to go to the library and look it up ourselves! And there was no email or texting! We had to actually write somebody a letter, with a pen! And then you had to walk all the way across the street and put it in the mailbox and it would take like a week to get there! And there were no MP3s! If you wanted to steal music, you had to go to the record store and shoplift it yourself! Or, we had to wait around all day to tape it off the radio and the DJ would usually talk over the beginning and mess it all up!

 You want to hear about hardship? We didn't have fancy stuff like Call Waiting! If you were on the phone and somebody else called, they got a busy signal! And we didn't have fancy Caller ID Boxes either! When the phone rang, you had no idea who it was, it could be your boss, your Mom, a collections agent, you didn't know!!! You just had to pick it up and take your chances, mister! And we didn't have any fancy Sony Playstation videogames with high-resolution 3-D graphics! We had the Atari 2600! With games like "Space Invaders" and "Asteroids"!

 Your guy was a little square! You had to use your imagination! And there were no multiple levels or screens, it was just one screen forever! And you could never win, the game just kept getting harder and faster until you died! Just like LIFE! When you went to the movie theater, there was no such thing as stadium seating! All the seats were the same height! If a tall guy sat in front of you, you watched his hairstyle!

And sure, we had cable television, but back then that was only like 20 channels and there was no onscreen menu! You had to use a little book called a TV Guide to find out what was on! And there was no Cartoon Network! You could only get cartoons on Saturday morning... D'ya hear what I'm saying!?! We had to wait ALL WEEK! That's exactly what I'm talking about! You kids today have got it too easy. You're spoiled! You guys wouldn't last five minutes back in 1984!     ~30ish Author Unknown~

Another from Mountain Wings.

Clark Gable

Clark Gable, the heartthrob of yesteryear gave some very solid 
advice for women.

He was the most dashing and sought after man of his time,
yet he gave a simple secret that gives any woman the power to 
make her man feel like a movie star.

Clark Gable said,

"The most important thing a man can know is that,
as he approaches his own door, someone on the other side
is listening for the sound of his footsteps."

Of course this sagely advice is void after midnight,
especially if he doesn't work the 3 to 11 shift.
My friend Warren sent me the "Rambling Rose." Thanks Mate.
A man takes a lady out to dinner for the first time. Later they go on to a show.
The evening is a huge success and as he drops her at her door he says 'I have had a lovely time.
You looked so beautiful, you remind me of a beautiful climbing rose. May I call on you tomorrow?'

She agrees and a date is made.
The next night he knocks on her door and when she opens it she slaps him hard across the face.
He is stunned. 'What was that for?' he asked.
She said 'I looked up beautiful climbing rose in the encyclopaedia last night and it said
"Best suited for rooting against a brick wall or fence, no good in an open bed"

My friend Lee sent the next one called "True"  Thank you Lee,
Subject: TRUE

When the shearing sheds are silent and the stock camps fallen quiet

When the gidgee coals no longer glow across the outback night

And the bush is forced to hang a sign, 'gone broke and won't be back'

And spirits fear to find a way beyond the beaten track

When harvesters stand derelict upon the wind swept plains

And brave hearts pin their hopes no more on chance of loving rains

When a hundred outback settlements are ghost towns overnight

When we've lost the drive and heart we had to once more see us right

When 'Pioneer' means a stereo and 'Digger' some backhoe

And the 'Outback' is behind the house, there's nowhere else to go

And 'Anzac' is a biscuit brand and probably foreign owned

And education really means brainwashed and neatly cloned

When you have to bake a loaf of bread to make a decent crust

And our heritage once enshrined in gold is crumbling to dust

And old folk pay their camping fees on land for which they fought

And fishing is a great escape; this is until you're caught

When you see our kids with scuffy caps and resentment in their eyes

And the soaring crime and hopeless hearts is no longer a surprise

When the name of RM Williams is a yuppie clothing brand

Not a product of our heritage that grew off the land

When offering a hand makes people think you'll amputate

And two dogs meeting in the street is what you call a 'Mate'

When 'Political Correctness' has replaced all common sense

When you're forced to see it their way, there's no sitting on the fence

Yes one day you might find yourself an outcast in this land

Perhaps your heart will tell you then, '. I should have made a stand'

Just go and ask the farmers that should remove all doubt

Then join the swelling ranks who say, 'don't sell Australia out'

Author unknown.

My cousin Karyn from New Zealand sent me one about drafting guys over 60.
Thanks Karyn.
 I am over 60 and the Armed Forces thinks I'm too old to 
track down terrorists. You can't be older than 42 to
join the military.
They've got the whole thing ass-backwards.
Instead of sending 18-year olds off to fight, they ought to take us old guys. You shouldn't be able to join a military unit until you're at least 35.
For starters, researchers say 18-year-olds think about
sex every 10 seconds. Old guys only think about
sex a couple of times a day, leaving us more than 28,000
additional seconds per day to concentrate on the enemy..
Young guys haven't lived long enough to be cranky, and a
cranky soldier is a dangerous soldier.
'My back hurts! I can't
sleep, I'm tired and hungry.' We are impatient and maybe
letting us kill some asshole that desperately deserves it
will make us feel better and shut us up for awhile..
An 18-year-old doesn't even like to get up before 10am . Old guys always get up early to pee, so what the hell. Besides, like I said, I'm tired and can't sleep and since I'm already up, I may as well be up killing some fanatical son-of-a-bitch. If captured we couldn't spill the beans because we'd forget where we put them. In fact, name, rank, and serial number would be a real brainteaser. Boot camp would be easier for old guys.. We're used to getting screamed and yelled at and we're used to soft food. We've also developed an appreciation for guns. We've been using them for years as an excuse to get out of the house, away from the screaming and yelling. They could lighten up on the obstacle course however... I've been in combat and never saw a single 20-foot wall with rope hanging over the side, nor did I ever do any push ups after completing basic training. Actually, the running part is kind of a waste of energy, too... I've never seen anyone outrun a bullet. An 18-year-old has the whole world ahead of him. He's still
learning to shave, to start a conversation with a pretty girl.
He still hasn't figured out that a baseball cap has a brim to
shade his eyes, not the back of his head. These are all great reasons to keep
our kids at home to learn a little more about life before sending them off into harm's way. Let us old guys track down those dirty rotten coward terrorists. The last thing an enemy would want to see is a couple million pissed off old farts with attitudes and automatic weapons, who know that their best years are already behind them. HEY!! How about recruiting Women over 50... in menopause!!!
You think MEN have attitudes??
Ohhhhhhhhhhhh my God!!! If nothing else, put them on
border patrol. They'll have it secured the first night! If you send this to your senior's in big type so they can read.
One from my good friend Jan called "Don't dial 90# for anyone." Thank you Jan.

Subject: Do not dial 90 hash for anyone
Please read below and pass on to your family & friends.
Got a call last night from an individual identifying himself as an Telstra Service technician who was conducting a test on our Telephone lines.
He stated that to complete the test I should touch nine(9),zero ( 0), hash (#) and then hang up.  Luckily, I was suspicious and refused.
Upon contacting the telephone company, I was informed that by pushing 90#, you give the requesting individual full access to your telephone line, which allows them to place long distance telephone calls billed to your home phone number.
I was further informed that this scam has been originating from many of the local Jails/prisons.

DO NOT press 90# for ANYONE. PLEASE pass this on to your friends.
If you have mailing lists and/or newsletters from organizations you are connected with, I encourage you to pass this on.

Stephen Cooper
Detective Senior Constable 29748
Victoria Police State Crime Squads
Level 12, 412 St. Kilda Road , Melbourne 
(03) 9865 2663 or 0414644499
Another from Jan. Thank you my friend.


The missus bought a Paperback
down Mumbles Saturday,
I had a look into her bag;
T’was “Fifty Shades of Grey”.

Well I just left her to it,
At ten I went to bed.
An one hour later she appeared;
The sight filled me with dread…..

In her left hand, she held a rope;
And in her right a whip!
She threw them down upon the floor,
And then began to strip.

Well fifty years or so ago;
I might have had a peek;
But Doris hasn’t weathered well;
She’s eighty four next week.

Watching Doris bump and grind;
Could not have been much grimmer.
Things they went from bad to worse;
She toppled off her Zimmer!

She struggled back upon her feet;
A couple minutes later;
She put her teeth back in and…
Said…..That I must dominate her!!

Now if you knew our Doris ,
You’d see just why I spluttered,
I’d spent two months in traction
From our last mad sex, I  muttered.

She stood there nude, all naked like;
Bent forward just a bit ….
So I thought what the hell,
Stepped forward, but  stood on her left tit!

Doris screamed, her teeth shot out;
My god what had I done!?
She moaned and groaned then shouted out:
“Step on the other one”!!

Well readers, I can’t tell no more;
About what occurred  that day.
Suffice to say, my jet black hair,….
Turned “fifty shades of Grey”

Just a repeat of the Evian water and H/P Printer Advt
because I like it and some of you may have missed it. 

Subject: Uplifting and joyful! Now THIS is great use of computer technology - just wonderful!

Actually this is an HP Printer & Evian Water commercial. But, there are only a few seconds which actually bring attention to the HP printer & Evian water. The bulk of the commercial is purely entertainment. And, IT IS AMAZING! I don't know how they do this kind of stuff, but it is flawless. It is so perfectly done that I could not find one thing that would make you think it wasn't real if you didn't know any better.

Great Commercial.

Well it is time to say Bye for now my friends.  Do look after yourselves and each other
Try to find something of joy each day.  My love and best wishes to you all. Cheers, Merle.

Post  807  ~ ~ ~ Sunday  4th  November,  2012.


audrey` said...

Veteran's Affairs is a great blessing from our Lord! Praise Him!

It's very good to know that you're doing very well, my dear friend. Please take very good care of yourself. Love and (((HUGS)))

Lee said...

Hahahahaha! I love the "Fifty Shades" joke, Merle! :)

I love Maukie, cute is he! He reminds me of Remy, my male cat...except Remy has a white nose, chin and chest. That's a really lovely! It brings a smile to my there can't be much wrong with that!

Glad to hear you're doing fine. Grab yourself the "Fifty Shades" trilogy and they'll keep you awake! ;)

Take good care, Merle...hugs. :)

Lady Di Tn said...

Glad to hear you are better and if sleep helps the pain, well become the sleeping beauty. The older folks armed forces is a good one. LOL Also, nice to hear that VA is so good to you. Wishing you enough. Peace and Love

Dave said...

The commercial is about a year old here and I laugh each time I see it... it's SO good! *S*

Glad you're doing well Merle..

Jim said...

Hi Merle ~~ It is really nice that you have the Veteran's Affairs to help your medicals. I am not familiar with Australia and their version of Medicare. Obviously it isn't like Canada or the U.K. isles or Ireland. Ireland anything over 65 (I think, it happened to me at over 70) is free.

Also I did not know of your Veteran's status. It is either being a vet's widow or you were in the service. I am a veteran (five years Army) but since I was not injured in service or war I have NO priority and would be sleeping on the streets with the hundreds of thousands here without my work retirement insurance and Medicare.

Your jokes were good. Didn't you think, "where am I?" when you were doing the 30's parent 'poor me' letter. We, or at least me, were like the parent in that situation. We had school on blizzard days. My dad hitched up the horses to our little utility trailer modified in the winter with the horse hitch, put us under a tarp in the trailer, and drove us the mile plus (up hills and down hills) through the blowing snow to school.

We never had TV while I was at home, let alone an Atari 2600. Do you tell your olden day tales? I tell the one about me riding my horse to high school for the first two years that I went to a two room country school three miles away for high school.

My Army days weren't like the troops had it today either.

I loved your Fifty Shades of Greay story. Perhaps this is why Mrs. Jim doesn't want me to read it.

Cheers (we are home from our three week stay in London with our 30-plus-year-old Yuppie worker and her family (Hub, Billy, and daughters KP and BP).