Tuesday, September 05, 2006

The Nice Guy.

Hello People ~~ It looks like I am back on the air.
Thanks to the efforts of my brother Peter at
http://www.holtieshouse.blogspot.com/
If we lose this one, we had better give up I think.
He has contacted some of you, and I have contacted
others with the new url It is called Third Try and
is as follows - - -
http://merle3rdtimelucky.blogspot.com/ for obvious
reasons. Thank you for your comments and support.
Now I might try to post something.

It is called “The Nice Guy”

He wasn’t much to look at
And he hadn’t much to say.
To all who wished to pass him,
He gave the right of way.
To all who asked assistance
He would give a helping hand.
And every sort of trouble
He appeared to understand.

He didn’t get his wisdom
From deep books on the shelf,
He’d learned the ache of sorrow
For he’d suffered it himself.
He knew the disappointment
Of a fond hope that’s denied,
And he knew a friend is heartened
When someone’s at his side.

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A couple of jokes now ---

A young monk arrives at the monastery and is assigned
to helping the other monks in copying the old texts and
laws of the church by hand.
He notices that all the monks are copying from copies,
not from the original manuscript.
So the new monk goes to the abbot to point out that if
someone made even a small error, in the first copy, it
would never be corrected. The error would be continued
in all later copies.
“We’ve been copying from the copies for centuries, but you
make a good point, my son.,” says the head monk.

He goes down into the dark caves underneath the monastery
where the original manuscripts were kept in a locked vault,
which hadn’t been opened for hundreds of years.
Hours went by and nobody sees the old abbot.

The young monk gets worried and goes down to look for him.
He finds him banging his head against the wall and wailing;
We missed the “R” !! We missed the “R” !!
His forehead is all bloody and bruised and he is crying
uncontrollably.
“What’s wrong, father?” asks the young monk.

With a choking voice, the old abbot replies: “The word was
celebrate.”

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They Ask Why I Like Retirement !

Question: How many days in a week?
Answer: 6 Saturdays, 1 Sunday


Question: When is a retiree's bedtime?
Answer: Three hours after he falls asleep on the couch.


Question: How many retirees to change a light bulb?
Answer: Only one, but it might take all day.


Question: What's the biggest gripe of retirees?
Answer: There is not enough time to get everything done.


Question: Why don't retirees mind being called Seniors?
Answer: The term comes with a 10% percent discount.


Question: Among retirees what is considered formal attire?
Answer: Tied shoes.


Question: Why do retirees count pennies?
Answer: They are the only ones who have the time.


Question: What is the common term for someone who enjoys
work and refuses to retire?
Answer: NUTS!


Question: Why are retirees so slow to clean out the
basement, attic or garage?
Answer: They know that as soon as they do, one of their
adult kids will want to store stuff there.


Question: What do retirees call a long lunch?
Answer: Normal.


Question: What is the best way to describe retirement?
Answer: The never ending Coffee Break.


Question: What's the biggest advantage of going back to
school as a retiree?
Answer: If you cut classes, no one calls your parents.


Question: Why does a retiree often say he doesn't miss
work, but misses the people he used to work with?
Answer: He is too polite to tell the whole truth.


My favorite one:

QUESTION: What do you do all week?
Answer: Mon to Fri. Nothing, Sat & Sun I rest!

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And a few quotes ---

If you don’t stand for something, you will fall for
anything. – Anonymous.
<><>

This above all --- to thine own self be true,
And it must follow, as night follows day,
Thou canst not then be false to any man.
--- William Shakespeare.
<><>

May your joys be as deep as the ocean, your
sorrows as light as it’s foam. – Anon.
<><>

No act of kindness, no matter how small is ever
wasted. ---Aesop.
<><>

Kindness is a language which the blind can see and
the deaf can hear. –Anon.
<><>

I expect to pass through life but once. If, therefore,
there be any kindness I can show, or any good thing
I can do to any fellow being, let me do it now, for I
shall not pass this way again. – William Penn.

<><><><><>

Bye for now, Take care of each other, Merle.

<><><><><><><>

23 comments:

Michelle said...

Merle thankgoodness you stopped by! I had a seazrch party out looking for you. Everytime i clicked on the old url it came up blog error :(

So glad you're back :o)

Karen said...

I am so glad that you're back! I'm sorry your other blog went belly-up! If it happens again, don't give up blogging but give up on Blogger!

Is it too early for me to retire? LOL

Have a great day! *HUGS*

jel said...

glad I found you, thought something had happen , I'm glad you are ok! :) I went to granny's blog , and found you!

hope this one is a good one for you !

take care
huggs!

Gwen said...

Hi merle
Welcome back nice jokes.

mar said...

Saw your comment at Connie's and wanted to see a new "beta" blog!!! so sorry they lost your blog, I guess they are not that ready for the challenge... Loved your jokes!

JunieRose2005 said...

Merle,

At last I am able to comment to you!!
Did you lose everything from your first blog???

That's bad!! :(

Anyway , enjoyed your post here- especially about retirees!

Have a good day.

June

Kathy said...

Merle missed you mate! Tried for a few days to find you and came across your new blog due to your brothers post. Just was'nt the same without you love! Missed all those jokes and lovely quips.
What happened.. Was hopin' to make the potato cakes this weekend but notice everything has disappeared.

Sorry about Carlton Merle . Guess you will have to barrack for your son's team in the finals.

GO EAGLES!!!!!

bec said...

hello grandma, fingers crossed this blog doesnt vanish into thin air too.
hope you are well
cheers Bec

Abandoned in Pasadena said...

The nice guy...I really liked that one...And also the monk joke about the missing R, that was cute.

I'm so glad that you are back and I'll give your new URL to Somershade because I know she loves you.

Sandy :)
See me smiling?

Ms. Vickie said...

Nice to see you back up and in operation, Thanks for the smiles today.

Sue said...

Great to see you back!
We loved the monk joke and the retirees.
((hugs))

HORIZON said...

Dearest Merle. So glad to find you 'three times lucky' ~ tried the other day to find your blog and couldn't!
I am away in a minute to phone my mum and tell her the monk joke- how funny.
I have missed your pick-me-ups in the mornings- time this end has flown by- so busy.
Hopefully l will now be able to check up a bit more often- so glad to have found you again my friend.
BESTS,
ps- thanks to Peter for getting you back online xx

Ava said...

Good to hear from you Merle! Glad to have you back.

Love ya!

kenju said...

I guess by your definition, I'm just "nuts"!!

Janice said...

Hi Merle,

I have been looking for your blog and wondered what had happened. You've had a real hard time of it haven't you?

I got your comment and found your blog the other day, but was unable to leave a comment. Ann hooked me up with a link to try, so I've found you again and this is MY third try leaving a comment, and I hope this gets easier as things go along.

Good luck with your new blog.

Janice~

Granny said...

Mr. Eddie is still having trouble leaving a comment here. I'll leave the link in his comment box. Don't have his email address.

Hugs from your social secretary in the USA.

Ann

Crazedmomof4 said...

Sorry to hear your blog is acting crazy. I hope this one works. They say the third time is a charm. :)

Have a good day!

Margaret said...

Dear Merle very funny jokes, especially the missed "R". Love Margaret

Jim said...

Hi Merle -- I mostly lurk around your blog but will stop in to say 'welcome back.'
Celebrate is a good word, celebate is a bad word. Maybe Beta.Blogger is celebrating when he should be celebate?
..

Jim said...

You know we are misspelling celibate?
Check this blog:
http://celibateinthecity.blogspot.com/
I'm not sure it is one I want to read.
..

Hale McKay said...

"We forgot the "R" ---that was great!

I really like the retirement quips.

Glad to see that your site is up and running.

Michelle said...

Merle it stinks you may have lost all your posts....i hope you find them all :o)

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