Friday, October 27, 2006

Part of The Smell of Rain Post.

Part of Post 52 which did not post, so here we go again.

Hello my friends, I posted the story of The Smell of Rain.

It was sent to me in an e-mail by my dear friend Robyn

and had beautiful pictures with it. Anyway, I hope you will enjoy it. I hope you all have a wonderful weekend.


Now for some jokes, that I have already typed once before,

so please find one or two funny.!!

<><><><>

A man was boasting to his friends that he and his wife had been married for three months and she didn’t have a clue that he drank, until he came home sober one night.


<><><><>


Fred was having his friend Bob from Texas stay over in Melbourne. Fred decided to take

Bob to Luna Park.

Bob, clearly bored said, “Theme parks are bigger in Texas.”

Fred decided to take Bob to is farm. Showing Bob his cattle,

he claimed, “Tese are some of the biggest cattle around.”

Bob said, “Ther’re bigger in Texas.”

Fred knew there was only one thing to do.

He led Bob to the biggest red gum on his property and said,

“These are some of the biggest trees I’ve seen.”

Bob said, “Trees are bigger in Texas.”

They were walking back to the house, when a kangaroo jumped out of the bushes. “What was that?” asked Bob.

“Don’t you have grasshoppers in Texas?” asked Fred.


<><><><>




The Brutal Truth. A man called up a bible believing church, and the church secretary answered. the call. The man at the other end of the line said, “I’d like to speak to the head hog.”

The secretary replied, “That wasn’t a very nice thing to say about our beloved minister, Rev. Jones.”

Again the man replied, “ I’d like to speak to the head hog, because I’m going to donate $75,000 to the church.”

She replied, “Hold on a moment, I think the fat pig just walked in.”


<><><><>


It wasn’t the apple in the Garden of Eden that caused the trouble, it was the pair on the ground.


<><><><>


A school teacher injured his back and had to wear a plaster cast around the upper part of his body. It fit under his shirt and was not noticeable at all. On the first day of term, still with the cast under his shirt, he found himself assigned to the toughest students in the school.

Walking confidently into the rowdy room, he opened the window as wide as possible and then busied himself with desk work.

When he could do his work at his desk, the strong breeze from the window made his tie flap annoyingly. He kept rearranging the tie as the class raised it’s level of unruliness.

Finally, becoming disgusted with his wayward tie, he stood up

and took a big stapler from his desk and stapled the tie to his chest in several places.

Discipline was not a problem from that day forth.


<><><><><>


And just a few quotes -- That I have also typed before !!




Problems are a major part of life. Don’t whinge about why you always have problems.

Rest assured, no matter what, throughout

your life you will always have to deal with problems,

So don’t waste time. Get on with the solving. Take it from

someone who has been there ---the solving gets easier as you

go along. - - - Sara Henderson.


<><><><>


I don’t regret anything I have ever done, so long as I enjoyed doing it at the time. - - - Katharine Hepburn.

<><><><>


You can’t have rosy views about the future if your mind is full

of blues about the past. - - - Anonymous.

<><><><>


Well that is it for this week folks, Have a great weekend. Merle.

End of Post 52, Friday, 27 October 2006

<><><><>

11 comments:

Wystful1 said...

I love the quotes....they are always good to read, as a reminder of good times....good things, and special events and thoughts. They help us carry on.

Now, the jokes? Too funny. I love the one with the stapled tie. Oh I can just picture this and the students. *laughing*

Happy weekend to you to Merle.

audrey` said...

HaHaHa!

Your posts are always so uplifting.
This is the site to visit for a lot of online happiness and generous sharing.

God bless you, Merle.

Take care =)

Margaret said...

Dear Merle I did laugh at all the jokes and ejoyed the quotes, what a pain you had to type them twice, I am glad you did. Love Margaret

Jim said...

Thanks for the first part. My Dad was a premie, his twin sister died in just a short time. Dad weighed two pounds, was born at home, and stayed in a shoe box on the stove.
This January Dad will be 97. Not going very strong now at all, but he sure has had a good life.

Texas grasshoppers are unbelievable, but not as big as the grown-up kangeroos.

BTW, we are back now. Thanks for checking on Billy's writings. His Dad's roses are the greatest.
..

Sue said...

Great jokes as usual Merle! We both enjoyed the plaster cast joke!
((hugs))

LZ Blogger said...

Merle ~ We loved those "Austrailian Grasshoppers" down under. (Both the Kangaroos and the Wallabees!) ~ jb///

JunieRose2005 said...

Hi Merle,

I'm back and trying to get caught up with everyone!

:) I like that joke about the TEXAN!

Junie

PEA said...

Robyn had also sent me the Smell of Rain story and I was so very touched by it, such a beautiful story! Loved the jokes and quotes...I laughed out loud at the one about "don't you have grasshoppers in Texas"? hehe Will have to remember that one!! They are forecasting a severe snowstorm overnight here so God knows what we'll wake up to in the morning! Take care dear Merle...Hugs xox

kenju said...

I don’t regret anything I have ever done, so long as I enjoyed doing it at the time. - - - Katharine Hepburn.

That's my favorite quote, Merle!!

Jeanette said...

HI Merle
You just gave me my daily dose of laughter loved your jokes and quotes.
I have had a bad back for many years now ive learnt to live with it over the years, some days good others not so good. sorry to hear you also have a bad back get plenty rest Take care, Jan

LittleJen said...

good jokes as usual Merle,, still laughing