Live and Love.

Hi everyone ~~ Another day gone where all the days go. I hope that you are having a good week with all going well for you and your families. I have been busy wrapping some presents, and have a lot more to do. At least I have them sorted out and this year I bought nice bags to put them in.

I am sorry some of you are having trouble posting comments. I have found this tonight as well. So if I don’t get round to you, please know that I am grateful for your kind words and I am glad that you enjoy the jokes, and I prefer to think you smile, rather than just read with no reaction. I am glad some of you liked the little Angel Worry Box story. Thank you.

Tonight I have some nice words that I do not remember where I read this or if someone sent it, but it is quite nice and I am calling it “Live and Love.”

As we grow up, we learn that even the one person that wasn't supposed to never let you down probably will.

You will have your heart broken probably more than once and it's harder every time.

You'll break hearts too, so remember how it felt when yours was broken.

You'll fight with your best friend.

You'll blame a new love for things an old one did.

You'll cry because time is passing too fast, and you'll eventually lose someone you love.

So take too many pictures, laugh too much, and love like you've never been

hurt because every sixty seconds you spend upset is a minute of happiness

you'll never get back.

Don't be afraid that your life will end, be afraid that it will never begin.

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Sorry about the small print, but I do not know how to increase the size, without typing it all. Now to find some jokes - - -

A ventiloquist is sitting on stage at a commedy club. He and his dummy are telling some crude blonde jokes, when a blonde lady sitting in the audience stands up.

“I’m so sick of you people who think that blondes are stupid,” she said. “It’s because of you that I have to work harder to prove myself at my job, and in the community.

“There are just as many dumb people with red or brown hair.

“There are just as many smart people with blonde hair.”

The ventriloquist looks at her and says : “Gosh, miss, I’m terribly sorrry. I was just telling jokes. I didn’t mean to hurt your feelings.”

The blonde replied : “Shut up !! I’m not talking to you. I’m talking to that little guy on your lap.”

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They keep telling us to get in touch with our bodies. Mine isn’t all that communicative but I heard from it the other day after I said, “Body, how’d you like to go to the 6 o’clock class in vigorous toning ?”

Clear as a bell my body said, “Listen fatty . . . do it and die.”

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My mind not only wanders, it sometimes leaves completely.

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The nice thing about living in a small town is when you don’t know what you’re doing, someone else always does.

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The best way to forget all your troubles is to wear tight shoes.

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Amazing !! You hang something in your closet for a while and it shrinks two sizes.

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Sometimes I think I understand - - then I regain consciousness

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Just when I was getting used to yesterday, along comes today.

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A circus trainer runs an ad for a lion tamer and 2 people turn up. One is a good-looking older man in his mid-sixties and the other a drop dead gorgeous blonde in her mid 20s.

The circus owner tells them, “I’m not going to sugar coat it. This is one ferocious lion. He ate my last tamer so you guys better be good or you’re history. Here’s your equipment - - - chair, whip and a gun. Who wants to try out first ?”

The blonde says, “I’ll go first.” She walks past the chair, the whip and the gun and steps right into the lion’s cage. The lion starts to snarl and pant and begins to charge her. About halfway there, she throws open her coat revealing her beautiful naked body. The lion stops dead in his tracks, sheepishly crawls up to her and starts licking her feet and ankles. He continues to lick and kiss her entire body for several minutes and then rests his head at her feet.

The circus owner’s mouth is on the floor. He says, “I’ve never seen a display like that in my life.” He then turns to the older man and asks, “Can you top that ?”

The older man replies, “No problem, just get that lion out of the way.”

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Two old ladies are outside their nursing home, having a drink and a smoke, when it starts to rain. One old lady pulls out a condom, cuts off the end, put it over her cigarette, and coontinues smoking.

Maude : What in the hell is that ?

Mabel : A condom. This way my cigarette doesn’t get wet.

Maude : Where did you get it ?

Mabel : You can get them at any drugstore.

The next day, Maude hobbles herself into the local drugstore and announces to the pharmacist that she wants a box of condoms.

The pharmacist, obviosly embarrassed, looks at her kind os strangely (she is after all, over 80 years of age), but very delicately asks what brand of condom she prefers.

“Doesn’t matter Sonny, as long as it fits on a camel.”

The pharmacist fainted.

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Now for a few quotes - - -

May your pockets be heavy and your heart be light,

May good luck pursue you each morning and night.

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Three may keep a secret, if two of them are dead.

- - - Benjamin Franklin.

No one gossips about other people’s secret virtues.

- - - Bertrand Russell.

God made Truth with many doors to welcome every believer who knocks on them. - - - Kahlil Gibran.

Charm is a way of getting the answer yes without asking a clear question. - - - Albert Camus.

We may have all come on different ships, but we’re all in the same boat now. - - - Martin Luther King Jr.

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Goodbye now folks, Take care ad be happy. Cheers, Merle.

Post 91 - - - - - Wednesday, 13 December 2006.