The Poor People.

Post 421 ~ ~ ~ Tuesday, 11th March, 2008.

Hello Everyone ~~ How is the world treating you? I hear some
of you lost an hour. We are going to gain an hour in about 3 weeks.
I hope the weather has improved in the Northern Hemisphere, and
the snow is melting and roads are safer. It is still too warm here for
me ~ 35, 36 37 C. All around 100F. In Adelaide, they have had
days of 40C which is 104F. Bring on Autumn. (Fall)

My Home Care lady came this morning, so the house is cleaner and
the washed sheets are on the line. They dry very quickly these days.
Everyone I speak to is feeling tired, and we are blaming the heat.

Now to stop complaining and get on with the post. My son, John
sent me this story which I thought was a good one. Thanks John.

One day, the father of a very wealthy family took his son to the
country with the express purpose of showing him how the poor
people live.

They spent a couple of days and nights on the farm of what would
be considered a very poor family.
On return from their trip, the father asked his son, "How was the trip?"
"It was great, Dad."

"Did you see how poor people live?" the father asked.
"Oh, yeah," said the son.
"So, tell me, what did you learn from the trip ?"

The son answered : . . . .
"I saw that we have one dog and they had four.
We have a pool that reaches to the middle of our garden and they
have a creek that has no end.
We have imported lanterns in our garden and they have the stars
at night.
Our patio reaches to the front yard and they have the whole
horizon.
We have a small piece of land to live on and they have fields that
go beyond our sight.
We have servants who serve us, but they serve others.
We buy our food, but they grow theirs.
We have walls around our property to protect us, they have
friends to protect them."

The father was speechless.
Then his son added, "Thanks Dad for showing me how poor we are."

Isn't perspective a wonderful thing? Makes you wonder what
would happen if we all gave thanks for everything we have, instead
of worrying about what we don't have.

Appreciate every single thing you have, especially your friends.
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My friend Gina sent me this one. Good for a re-run, Thanks Gina.

A Woman's Poem.

He didn't like the casserole.
And he didn't like my cake.
He said my biscuits were too hard . . .
Not like his mother used to make.

I didn't perk the coffee right
He didn't like the stew,
I didn't mend his socks
The way his mother used to do.

I pondered for an answer,
I was looking for a clue.
Then I turned around and smacked the s**t out of him . . .
Like his mother used to do.
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Some High School Test Answers ~ ~ The following questions
were actually collected from tests given in 2000 to 16 year
old student. Don't laugh too hard, one of these kids could be
Prime Minister one day.

Q. Name the four seasons.
A. Salt, pepper, mustard and vinegar.

Q. Explain one of the processes by which water an be made safe
to drink.
A. Flirtation makes water safe to drink, because it removes
large pollutants like grit, sand, dead sheep and canoeists.

Q. How is dew formed ?
A. The sun shines down on the leaves and makes them perspire.

Q. What is a planet ?
A. A body of earth surrounded by sky.

Q. In a democratic society, how important are elections?
A. Very important. Sex can only happen when a male gets
an election.

Q. What are steroids ?
A. Things for keeping carpets on the stairs.

Q. What happens when your body as you age ?
A. When you get old, so do your bowels and you get
intercontinental.

Q. Name a major disease associated with cigarettes ?
A. Premature death.

Q. How can you delay milk turning sour ?
A. Keep it in the cow.

Q. How are the main parts of the body categorized ?
(Eg., abdomen.)
A. The body is consisted into three parts . . . . the
brainium, the borax, and the abdominal cavity.
The brainium contains the brain, the borax contains
the heart and lungs, and the abdominal cavity contains
the five vowels, A, E, I, O, and U.

Q. What is a fibula ?
A. A small lie.

Q. What does " varicose" mean ?
A. Nearby.

Q. What is the most common form of birth control ?
A. Most people prevent contraception by wearing a
condominium.

Q. Give the meaning of the term "Caesarian section."
A. The caesarian section is a district in Rome.

Q. What is a seizure ?
A. A Roman emperor.

Q. What is a terminal illness ?
A. When you are sick at the airport.

Q. What does benign mean ?
A. Benign is what you will be after you be eight.

Q. What is a turbine ?
A. Something an Arab wears on his head.

Q. What is a Hindu ?
A. It lays eggs.
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The Laws of Work. ~ ~ ~

If you can't get your work done in the first 24 hours,
work nights.

If it weren't for the last minute, nothing would get done.

No matter how much you do, you never do enough.

A pat on the back is only a few inches from a kick in the butt.

Don't be irreplaceable, if you can't be replaced, you can't be
promoted.

If at first you don't succeed, try again. Then quit. No use
being a fool about it.

The last person that quit or was fired will be held responsible
for everything that goes wrong.
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A blonde was speeding in an 80km zone when a local police
cruiser pulled her over and walked up to the car. The police
officer also happened to be a blonde and she asked for the
blonde's licence.

The driver searched frantically in her purse for a while and
finally said to the blonde police woman, "What does a driver's
licence look like ?"

Irritated, the blonde cop said, :You dummy, it's got your
picture on it."

The blonde frantically searched her purse again and found a
small rectangular mirror down at the bottom. She held it up
to her face and said, "Aha, Tis must be my driver's licence,"
and handed it to the blonde police-woman.

The blonde cop looked in the mirror, handed it back to the
driver and said, " You're free to go. And if I had known you
were a police officer too, we could have avoided all this hassle."
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An atheist was taking a walk through the woods. "What majestic
trees ! What beautiful animals !" he said to himself.

As he was walking along-side the river he heard a rustling in
the bushes behind him. He turned to look, A seven foot
grizzly was charging towards him. He ran as fast as he could up
the path. He looked over his shoulder and saw the bear was
closing in on him. His heart was pumping frantically and he
tried to run faster.

He tripped and fell to the ground. He rolled over to pick himself
up, but saw the bear was on top of him. At that instant, the atheist
cried out, "Oh, my God."

Time stopped. The bear froze. The forest was silent as a bright
light shone upon him and a voice came out of the sky, "You deny
my existence for all these years, teach others I don't exist, and
even credit creation to a cosmic accident. Do you expect me to
help you out of this predicament ?"

The atheist looked directly into the light. "It would be hypocritical
of me to suddenly ask you to treat me as a Christian now, but
perhaps you could make the BEAR a Christian.

There was a pause and then the voice said, "Very well."
The light went out. And the sounds of the forest resumed.
And then the bear dropped his right paw, brought both paws
together, bowed his head and spoke, "Lord, Bless this food I am
about to receive and for which I am truly thankful."
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My neighbor found out her dog could hardly hear so she took
it to the veterinarian.
He found the problem was hair in it's ears, so he cleaned both
ears and the dog could hear fine, The vet then proceeded to
tell the lady that if she wanted to keep this from happening
again, she should go to the store and get some "Nair" hair
remover cream and rub it in the ears once a month.

The lady goes to the drug store and gets some "Nair"hair
remover. At the register the druggist tells her, "If you're going
to use this under your arms, don't use deodorant for a few
days."
"I'm not going to use it under my arms.."
"If you're using it on your legs, don't shave for a couple of days."

The lady says, "I'm not using it on my legs either. If you must
know, I'm using it on my schnauzer."
The druggist said, "Stay off your bicycle for a week."
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Now for a few quotes ~ ~ ~

'Tis better to have loved and lost, than never to have loved
at all. ~ ~ ~ Alfred Lord Tennyson.

Come not, when I am dead, To drop your foolish tears upon
my grave. ~ ~ ~ Alfred Lord Tennyson.

For of all words of tongue or pen. T he saddest are these,
"It might have been." ~ ~ John Greenleaf Whittier.

I wandered lonely as a cloud that floats on high o'er vales and
hills, When all at once I saw a crowd.
A host of golden daffodils; beside the lake, beneath the trees
Fluttering and dancing in the breeze.
~ ~ ~ William Wordsworth.
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That's it for this post folks. I hope you found something of
interest Or something to make you chuckle... Take care
of each other and yourselves. Do something nice for a
person who looks miserable, even just a smile and A "hi."
Love and best wishes to you all. Cheers, Merle.

Post 421 ~ ~ ~ Tuesday, 11th March, 2008.
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