Thursday, August 07, 2008

The Brick.

Post 492 ~ ~ ~ Thursday, 7th August 2008.

Hi Everyone ~~ I haven't been able to open my blog
today and this just opened, so I hope it does what it
is supposed to. I have done some cooking today, a
very nice stew in the crockpot. And then the usual
pea and ham soup. So that's a start, more to do over
the weekend.

I hope all is well with you all as we near another
weekend. Twice this month I have typed July,
before correcting it. Guess I am trying to slow down
time, or to skip August! Somehow, I don't think I
will win that one.

I have a nice story that my friend Lorraine sent me.
I think I have posted it before, a long time ago.
It is called "The Brick."

A young and successful executive was traveling
down a neighborhood street. going a bit too fast
in his new Jaguar. He was watching for kids
darting out from between parked cars and slowed
down when he thought he saw something. As his
car passed, no children appeared; instead a brick
smashed into the Jag's side door. He slammed on
the brakes and backed the Jag back to the spot
where the brick had been thrown.

The angry driver then jumped out of the car, and
grabbed the nearest kid and pushed him up against
a parked car, shouting, "What was that all about
and who are you? That's a new car and that brick
you threw is going to cost a lot of money. Why did
you do it?"

The young boy was apologetic, "Please mister. .please
I'm sorry but I didn't know what else to do. " He
pleaded, " I threw the brick because no one would
stop." With tears dripping down his face and off his
chin, the youth pointed to a spot just around a parked
car. "It's my brother," he said, "He rolled off the curb
and fell out of his wheel-chair and I can't lift him up."

Now sobbing, the boy asked the stunned executive,
"Would you please help me get him back into his
wheel-chair? He's hurt and he's too heavy for me."

Moved beyond words, the driver tried to swallow the
rapidly swelling lump in his throat. He hurriedly lifted
the handicapped boy back into the wheel-chair, then
took a linen handkerchief and dabbed at the fresh cuts
and scrapes. A quick look told him everything was
going to be okay. "Thank you and may God bless you,"
the grateful child told the stranger.

Too shook up for words, the man simply watched the
boy push his wheel-chair bound brother down the side-
walk towards their home.

It was a long slow walk to the Jaguar. The damage was
very noticeable, but the driver never bothered to repair
the dented side door. He kept the dent there to remind
him of this message, "Don't go through life so fast that
someone has to throw a brick at you to get your attention."

God whispers in our souls and speaks to our hearts.
Sometimes when we don't have time to listen, He has
to throw a brick at us. It's our choice to listen or not..

Thought for the day :
If God had a refrigerator, your picture would be on it.

If He had a wallet, your photo would be in it.

He sends you flowers every spring.

He sends you a sunrise every morning.

Face it, Friends, He is crazy about you.

God didn't promise days without pain, or
laughter without sorrow, sun without rain,
But He did promise strength for the day, comfort
for the tears, and light for the way.

If God brings you to it, He will bring you through it.
<><>

Joke time ~ ~ First one from Lady Di. Thank you.
United States Map.
A father wanted to read a magazine but was being
bothered by his little girl, Shelby. She wanted to
know what the United States looked like.

Finally he tore a sheet out of his new magazine on
which was printed the map of the country. Tearing
it into small pieces, he gave it to Shelby and said,
"Go into the other room and see if you can put this
together. This will show you our whole country today."

After a few minutes, Shelby returned and handed
him the map, correctly fitted and taped together.
The father was surprised and asked how she had
finished it so quickly.

"Oh," she said, "on the other side of the paper is a
picture of Jesus. When I got all of Jesus back where
He belonged, then our country just came together.
<><>
Thank you Patty for this next one.

The Sheriff in a small town walks out in the street
and sees a blonde cowboy coming down the walk
with nothing on but his cowboy hat, gun and boots,
so he arrests him for Indecent Exposure.

As he is locking him up, he asks, "Why in the world
are you dressed like this?"

The cowboy says, "Well it's like this Sheriff. I was in
the bar down the road, and this pretty little red-head
asks me to go to her motor home with her. So I Did..

We go inside and she pulls off her top and asks me to
pull off my shirt. So I did.

So then she pulls off her skirt and asks me to pull off
my pants. So I did.

Then she pulls off her panties and asks me to pull off
my shorts. So I did.

Then she gets on the bed and looks at me kind of sexy
and says, "Now go to town, cowboy . . . "

And here I am."

Son of a Gun, Blonde Men do exist.!!!
<><>

Another from Lady Di, Thank you.

Marriage changes passion.
Suddenly you're in bed with a relative.

I saw a woman wearing a sweat shirt with "Guess"
on it. So I said, "Implants?" She hit me.

How come we choose from just two people to
run for President and over fifty for Miss America?

Now that food has replaced sex in my life, I can't
even get into my own pants.

I signed up for an exercise class and was told to
wear loose fitting clothing. If I HAD any loose
fitting clothing, I wouldn't have xigned up in the
first place.

When I was young we used to go "skinny dippy"
now I just "chunky dunk."

Never argue with an idiot; people watching may
not be able to tell the difference.

Wouldn't it be nice..if when we messed up our life
we could just press "Ctrl Alt Delete" and start over?

Why is it that our children can't read a Bible in
school but they can in prison?

Wouldn't you know it . ..Brain cells come and brain
cells go, but FAT cells live forever.

Why do I have to swear on the Bible in court when
the Ten Commandments cannot be displayed outside?

Bumper sticker of the year :

"If you can read this, thank a teacher - and since it's
in English, thank a soldier."
<><>
My friend, Sandy sent me jokes too, so I will post two.
Thank you Sandy.

The 1st Affair.
A married man was having an affair with his
secretary. One day they went to her place and made
love all afternoon. Exhausted, they fell asleep and
woke at 8 PM.

The man hurriedly dressed and told his lover to take
his shoes outside and rub them in the grass and dirt.
He put on his shoes and drove home.

"Where have you been?" his wife demanded.
"I can't lie to you. I'm having an affair with my
secretary. We had sex all afternoon."

She looked down at his shoes and said:
"You lying B*****d. You've been playing golf."
<><>
The 2nd Affair.

A middle aged couple had two beautiful
daughters but always talked about having a son.

They decided to try one last time for the son they
always wanted. The wife got pregnant and
delivered a healthy baby boy.

The joyful father rushed to the nursery to see his
new son. He was horrified at the ugliest child he
had ever seen.

He told his wife: "There's no way I can be the father
of this baby. Look at the two beautiful daughters
I fathered.
Have you been fooling around behind my back?"

The wife smiled sweetly and replied,
"No, not this time!!"
<><>
I will post the others next time.

Well it is time now to try and publish this.
I hope you are enjoying your lives and being kind
to each other. Love and best wishes to you all.
Cheers, Merle.

Post 492 ~ ~ ~Thursday, 7th August, 2008.
<><><>









3 comments:

Anonymous said...

Dear Merle,Gwen and Myself cant get into your blog we have tryed many times, im doing this from Paulines computer. I managed to get your blog up by going through Peters side bar and clicking on your actual post. nice story and great jokes..
hope blogger sorts out this problem ,,, Love Janxxxxxxx

Gramma Ann said...

Hi Merle,

So glad you are back on the air. I got my chuckles for the day again..

Have a nice week-end..And also was glad to hear that your tests turned out fine.

Ann

audrey` said...

The First Affair and The Second Affair are so funny =D
Thank you for the laughter =)