Saturday, November 29, 2008

The Meaning of Life.

Post 540 ~ ~ ~ Saturday, 29th November, 2008.

Hello my Friends ~~ Expect a shorter post tonight as I am tired. All that supervising is
hard to take. My table and chairs are now assembled and sitting in the gazebo. It took
my son John a couple of hours to put them together and now I am very pleased with the results. Thank you very much John, much appreciated. Also Lorraine had a garage sale
over the road, so I went over there a couple of times. She has moved into her lovely new home, and will be sorely missed in this street.

I do hope you all survived Thanksgiving and had a wonderful day with family and friends.
And I hope you are enjoying the weekend. I certainly am, but I am tired.

The new table and chairs installed in the gazebo. The table has a glass top and the chairs
are nice and sturdy, and I can get up out of them, fairly easily.

We decided to leave the chairs in close to the table in case of a lot of rain. It is unlikely
but you never know. We have been fortunate to have had some good rain this month.

My good friend, Sherrill sent me "The Meaning of Life." I hope you enjoy it.

On the first day, God created the dog and said, "Sit all day by the door of your house and bark at anyone who comes in or walks past. For this I will give you a lifespan of 20 years.

The dog said, "That's a long time to be barking. How about only 10 years and I'll give you back the other 10. So God agreed.

On the second day, God created the monkey and said, "Entertain people, do tricks and make them laugh. For this I will give you a 20 year life-span."

The monkey said, "Monkey tricks for 20 years? That's a pretty long time to perform.
How about I give you back 10 like the dog did?
And God agreed.

On the third day, God created the cow and said, "You must go into the field with the farmer all day long and suffer under the sun, have calves and give milk to support the farmer's family. For this I will give you a life span of 60 years."

The cow said, "That's kind of a tough life you want me to live for sixty years. How about 20 and I'll give back the other 40?" And God agreed again.

On the fourth day, God created man and said, "Eat, sleep, play, marry and enjoy your life. For this I will give you 20 years.

But man said, "Only 20 years? Could you possibly give me my twenty, the forty the cow gave back, the ten the dog gave back, and ten the monkey gave back; that makes eighty, okay?"
"Okay," said God, "You asked for it."

So that is why for our first 20 years, we eat. sleep, play and enjoy ourselves. For the next 40 years, we slave in the sun to support our family. For the next 10 years we do monkey tricks to entertain the grandchildren. And for the last 10 years we sit on the front porch and bark at everyone.

Life has now been explained to you.

Some turkey riddles ~ ~ sent to me by my dear friend, Patty. Thank you Patty.

What did the mother turkey say to her disobedient children?
If your father could see you now, he'd turn over in his gravy.

What is the difference between a chicken and a turkey?
Chickens celebrate Thanksgiving.

Which side of the turkey has the most feathers?
The outside.

Why do turkeys eat so little?
Because they are always stuffed.

Why did the turkey cross the road?
It was the chicken's day off.

What key has legs and can't open doors?

How do you keep a turkey in suspense?
I'll tell you at Christmas.

Asked to write a composition entitled, "What I'm thankful for on Thanksgiving."
Little Johnny wrote, "I'm thankful that I'm not a turkey."

Good News and Bad News for a Pastor.

Good News : You baptized seven people today in the river.
Bad News : You lost two of them in the swift current.

Good News: The Women's Guild voted to send you a Get Well card.
Bad News: The vote passed 31-30.

Good News: The Elder Board accepted your job description the way you wrote it.
Bad News: They were so inspired by it, they also formed a search committee to find someone capable of filling the position.

Good News: You finally found a choir director who approaches things exactly the same as you do.
Bad News: The choir mutinied.

Good News: Mrs. Jones is wild about your sermons.
Bad News: Mrs. Jones is also wild about Ozzy Osbourne, "Desperate Housewives" and "Chainsaw Massacre."

Good News: The trustees finally voted to add more church parking.
Bad News: They are going to blacktop the front lawn of your parsonage.

Good News: Church attendance rose dramatically the last three weeks.
Bad News: You were on vacation.

Good News: Your biggest critic just left your church.
Bad News: She has been appointed the District Supervisor of your denomination's region.

Good News: The youth in your church come to your house for a surprise visit.
Bad News: It's the middle of the night and they are armed with toilet paper and shaving cream to 'decorate' your house.

Enough for this post. Have a great rest of the weekend and I will see you next in December
Take great care of yourselves and each other. My love and best wishes to you all.
Cheers, Merle.

Post 540 ~ ~ ~ Saturday, 29th November, 2008.


Sometimes Saintly Nick said...

The chairs and table look wonderful, Merle. Thanks for the funnies.

Bear Naked said...

Your table and chairs set look lovely and so comfortable.

Bear((( )))

Winifred said...

Merle that garden furniture looks wonderful. You'll have some lovely times out there this summer.

Gramma Ann said...

G'day Merle,

Your gazebo with the new furniture looks so inviting. I'm sure you have already spend some time just setting in it and relaxing. Such a lovely setting with all the flowers blooming in the background. Enjoy your summer in your gazebo.

As always you make me laugh, what can I say? Have a nice Sunday and enjoy your new furniture and gazebo.

carl h. sr. said...

Such a peaceful and tidy looking place is your backyard.
I like the tall fence that you have as well. I sure know what you mean about some chairs being easier to get out of than others!
Peace be with you,

Gledwood said...

Is your street anything like Ramsay Street..??

Rosezilla said...

Thank you for explaining life to me, lol! That was pretty good. Love your gazebo and furniture! Lovely.

Technonana said...

The Patio looks lovely!!! Soon you will have great weather to enjoy it!! We are beginning winter, but it has been unseasonable cold for us here in South Carolina,USA for the last 2weeks... no snow but cold and rainy.
I love the next to last Joke... My Son, Phillip is a Youth Minister, and he can tell you all about those visits...
He even came home one night to find that his yard had been 'forked'.. his 'kids' had taken plastic forks and stuck them in the ground all over his yard!!!
Oh the exubreance of youth!!

Mountain Mama said...

Your new gazebo and furniture are just wonderful!! And just in time for your summer too. You are going to really enjoy it.
We had a nice Thanksgiving. I am freezing leftovers today because I've had enough rich food for a while. I am putting beans to soak tonight and made a big veggie salad today so will be eating more healthy again.
Loved the jokes Merle.
I hope you are rested up and feeling like a spring chicken by now!

Rinkly Rimes said...

I can picture you enjoying that fabulous garden setting.

audrey` said...

Wow! The table and chairs are so lovely, Merle =)
It's so nice of John to help you.

Sioux said...

Hope your summer will be as beautiful as your patio!!!

Hootin' Anni said...

Hi Merle! I just reposted a photo of my bird of paradise from a couple weeks ago. All for you. LOL [It's on my Sunday blog...scroll down.]

Your furniture looks super. Very comfortable. I'd come sit with you and we could chat away the day.

Love the good news/bad news segment. But of course, as always, love your humor postings.

Lady Di Tn said...

You did a great job supervising as it looks like a perfect place to sit and have a cuppa. Stay cool or come visit as we are having our winter. Peace

NoExpertsNeeded said...

Hello from California!

I hope you don't mind me nosing around your blog. (Google Search always serves up "Meaning of Life" entries to my computer.)

It may sound strange to you now, but I would like to offer you a free gift (pdf) copy of book (see below). Please trust that there are no strings/spam attached, really! (It's simply my way of 'giving back' to life...)

The story of my Spirit-led adventure includes a chapter on my trip to Australia...I love your country and her people!

...Just consider this a sort of stocking stuffer gift from me to you (and all who read this as well.)

Get your free e-book copy at:

take care,
Louise Lewis, author
"No Experts Needed: The Meaning of Life According to YOU!

Happy Holidays!

Jim said...

Hi Merle, I had liked your gazzebo but it was sort of bare. It sure needed these nice chairs. John is nice to you.
I did get behind, please forgive me. I almost missed those nice blonde jokes from Thursday. I would hated to have missed the one who outsmarted the scientist! He really didn't know crap, but did she?
All the K Mart stores in Texas have been closed for several years. We have an old timey hardware store in Willis (our closest town) with a deli. They sell meat, potato salad, cheese, and the like. They may have Irish sausage.
They still sell nails by the pound, bolts by the inch, will cut pipe to suit, and the likes.
I should blog about it some more.

Janice said...

Hi Merle,

I like your table and chair set, and the gazibo too.

Thanks for 'publishing the meaning of life,' now I think I understand, lol.


Jeanette said...

gday dear Merle.Sorry im late had a busy couple of days.. Ive just got in from a bowls Xmas dinner and a couple of wines will post some pics soon , your gazebo looks lovely with your new setting . cant wait to have a cuppa under the gazebo in those lovely comfy looking chairs..
I take my covers in every night to keep them looking nice, My friend leaves hers out all seasons and her covers are looking really tatty due to weather and the dew at night.. its a little extra work taking them in at night but worth it to keep them nice... well my friend im of to bed playing Pennant in morning got to be at club by 8am
Great jokes .. Love Janxxxxx

Great Jokes.

Gattina said...

Your gazebo looks really very nice ! I wished I could sit there with you and have a chat ! I came back from Egypt yesterday and after 2 weeks of 30° I am now in just 4° cold and wet weather !
You lucky girl starts summer now ! I think I should move !