Thursday, February 05, 2009

It Shows in Your Face.

Post 569 ~ ~ ~ Thursday, 5th February, 2009.

Hello Everyone ~ ~ I hope all is well with you, as it is with me, pretty darned hot. It is 9.30 pm and still 30 C about 86 F. I guess that is better than the 41C we had earlier --105.8 F.
I am a day late with this post as I had some visitors last night. My son John and a friend called in and put together another pedestal fan I had bought on Tuesday.

I have a lovely poem for you tonight that was sent to me by a new friend Laura.
It is called "It Shows in Your Face," and was written by Lottie Pratt Brown.

You don't have to tell how you live each day;
You don't have to say if you work or you play;
A tried, true barometer serves in the place --
However you live, it will show in your face.

The false, the deceit that you bear in your heart,
Will not stay inside where it first got a start;
For sinew and blood are a thin veil of lace --
What you wear in your heart, you wear in your face.

If you've gambled and won in the great game of life,
If you feel you have conquered the sorrow and strife;
If you've played the game fair and you stand on first base --
You don't have to say so; it shows in your face.

If you dispute nights till the day is nigh,
There's surely one tattler and one who won't lie;
Since your facial barometer is right in it's place,
You don't have to tell folks, it shows in your face.
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My friends from England sent me the next item and photos. Thank you Sue and Bob.

This is Australia . . . . . . .!!! Victoria has just suffered a record heat wave and . . . . . A friend of a friend sent it to them.

A little koala which just walked into the back porch fooking for a bit of heat relief. She filled up a large dish with water and this happened.


First a drink.


Then test the water


Then hop right in and have a cooling bath. He sure seems at home.
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Another from Sue and Bob, Thank you. What do Retired People do all Day?

Working people frequently ask retired people what they do to make their days interesting.
Well for example, the other day my wife and I went into toen and went into a shop.
We were only in there for about 5 minutes. When we came out, there was a cop writing out a parking ticket.
We went up to him and said, "Come on man, how about giving a senior citizen a break?"

He ignored us, and continued writing the ticket.
I called him a Nazi turd. He glared at me and started writing another ticket for having worn tyres. So my wife called him a s**t-head.

He finished writing the second ticket and put it on the wind-shield with the first.
Then he started writing a third ticket. This went on for about 20 minutes.

The more we abused him, the more tickets he wrote.
Personally, we didn't care. We came to town by bus.

We try to have a little fun each day now we are retired. It's important at our age.

My cousin Bill sent me the next two. Thanks a lot Bill, nice to hear from you.

Why Parents Drink.

The boss wondered why one of his most valued employees was absent but had not phoned in sick one day. Needing to have an urgent problem with one of the main computers resolved, he dialed the employee's home phone number and was greeted with a child's whisper , "Hello?"

"Is your daddy home?" he asked. "Yes" whispered the small voice.
"Can I talk to him ?" The child whispered, "No."

Surprised and wanting to talk to an adult, the boss asked, "Is your Mummy there?" Yes."
"May I talk with her?" Again the small voice whispered, "No."

Hoping there was somebody with whom he could leave a message, the boss asked, "Is
anyone else there?" "Yes", whispered the child, "A policeman . . ."

Wondering what a cop would be doing at his employee's home, the boss asked, "May I
speak to the policeman?" "No, he's busy," whispered the child.
"Busy doing what?"

"Talking to Mummy and Daddy and the fireman," came the whispereed answer.

Growing more worried as he heard a loud noise in the background through the ear-piece
of the phone, the boss asked, "What is that noise?"

"A helicopter . . ." answered the whispering voice.
"What is going on there?" demanded the boss, now truly apprehensive. Again whispering,
the child answered, "The search team just landed a helicopter."

Alarmed, concerned and a little frustrayed the boss asked, "What are they searching for?"

Still whispering, the young voice replied with muffled giggle, " ME.."
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Quickie in the Bushes . . . .

There are two statues in a park; one a nude man and a nude woman. They had been facing each other across a pathway for a hundred years, when one day an angel comes down from the sky and, with a single gesture, brings the two to life.

The angel tells them, "As a reward for being so patient through a hundred blazing summers and dismal winters, you have been given life for thirty minutes to do what you've wished to do the most."

He looks at her, she looks at him, and they go running behind the shrubbery. The angel
waits patiently as the bushes rustle and giggling ensues. After fifteen minutes, the two return, out of breath and laughing.

The angel tells them, "Um, you have fifteen minutes left, would you care to do it again?"
He asks her, "Shall we?"
She eagerly replies, "Oh, yes, let's. But let's change positions.
This time, I'll hold the pigeon down and you s**t on its head."

,,,,,,,,....... AND WHAT WERE YOU THINKING ?????
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One from my dear friend Patty .. Thank you for this one, my friend.

A 6 year old and a 4 year old are upstairs in their bedroom. "You know what?" says the 6 year old, "I think it's about time we started cussing." The 4 year old nods his head in agreement
The 6 year old continue, "When we go downstairs for breakfast, I'm gonna say "Hell"
and you say something with "ass" in it."

When the mother walks into the kitchen and asks the 6 year old what he wants for his breakfast, he replies, " Aw hell, Mom, I guess I'll have some Cheerios." WHACK. He flies
out of his chair, tumbles across the kitchen floor, gets up. and runs upstairs crying his eyes out, with his mother in hot pursuit, slapping his rear with every step. His mom locks him in his room and shouts, "You can stay there until I let you out."

She then comes back downstairs, looks at the 4 year old and asks in a stern voice, "And
what do YOU want for breakfast, young man?"

"I don't know," he blubbers, "But you can bet your fat ass, it won't be Cheerios."
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From the paper - - - Proof that men have better friends.

Friendship among Women.
A woman didn't come home one night. The next morning she told her husband that she had slept over at a friend's house.
The man called his wife's 10 best friends.
None of them knew anything about it.


Friendship Among Men.
A man didn't come home one night. The next morning he told his wife he had slept over at a friend's house. The woman called her husband's 10 best friends.
Eight confirmed that he had slept over, and two said he was still there.
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Time to say Goodnight my friends. I hope you are having a good week and not too much snow or rain or the heat. Take good care of each other as we head to another weekend.
My love and best wishes to you all. Cheers, Merle.

Post 569 ~ ~ ~ Thursday, 5th February, 2009.
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13 comments:

Gledwood said...

I'm glad the weather's getting more and more clement...

I remember one day when I went to India ~ this was December which is as midwinter as it gets in Madras/Chennai... but one day it must have hit 40 degrees in fact I tried to look up the exact temp on that date (which surely ought to be somewhere online..??) but couldn't find it

I know it was hot because the ordinary max winter temp in goa is around 30C but this was in another league

you could barely see for the shimmering coming off the ground and when the breeze blew and I pinwheeled my arms no matter how vigorously the air still felt HOT ~ the only time I've ever felt such an extreme was walking into teh cactus house in Kew Gardens which as you might know is one of the biggest botannical gardens in the world... of course at Kew you've come from normal British (probably drizzling cold) to some fair desert heat ~ in India this was how we felt when acclimatized for 3 weeks honestly it's the only time I feared I might truly melt!

Anyway just thought I'd share that meandering with you, take care Merle

XXOO

Margaret Cloud said...

I am glad you have another fan to keep cool, I like to have a fan on me in the hot weather. That koala is so cute. Do you have a lot of these come into your yard? I can't pick a favorite one today, they are all good, but the statue one, I was thinking naughty thoughts, take care.

Rinkly Rimes said...

I think that koala photo is absolutely GORGEOUS! Can I 'poem' it?

Patty said...

The koala is darling. But can't they sometimes get a little mean, I understand they have pretty good size claws.

I read the joke, When is it time to start cussing to my Mother the other night. She was chuckling at different spots as I would end a sentence, but when I gave her the punch line about the 4 year old, all at once I heard nothing, and then finally she caught her breath and was really chuckling. That made me feel good to think she had a good laugh for the day.

I keep telling her she needs to sell out and move down here, that way I could see her, and either take supper to her every evening, or run and pick her up and bring her here to eat with the family. I know she would want her own place.

That would mean my two brothers would have to travel further to see her, but the youngest one only goes to see her when he needs or wants something and the older of the two tries to stop in once a week. She says, well if I knew how long I might live, I keep telling her Mom, spend your money (not that she has that much) because when a family member dies, it sure brings out the greed in everyone. And she's made me her executor of her estate. Which means I would have to change the locks on her house right away to keep the younger brother out because he thinks everything in there belongs to him now. They already sold him another house they had just for a few dollars. Mom and Dad when he was alive, had to pay the taxes, insurance and etc, and my brother and his wife lived there free. I said Mom, you guys need to sell it to him or give it to him and then it's his worry about the insurance, taxes and etc. So they did.

I keep hoping she'll sell the house, a big story and a half, older home, and all the furnishing except some pieces she wants for sentimental reasons, and buy herself some new things and enjoy herself. I don't want to see her go into a nursing home, she's still in fairly good health. But we do have a great nursing/senior citizen home here in our town. And my niece works there, she's an RN. When Mom was recuperating from her knee surgery, I would run over several times aday. Some days I ate supper with her. She said she really enjoyed it, but she still liked her own place the best. Like they say, be it ever so humble here's no place like home.

Well I have certainly rambled on, sorry about that. It's almost time to call my Mom. I call her at least once in the evening, sometimes once or twice during the day.

You take care, keep cool. I wish I could bottle some of this cold frigid air we have and send it to you. Sleep well.

Puss-in-Boots said...

Hi Merle, that heatwave is shocking, isn't it and it's going on for so long. For once Qld is relatively mild. In fact the weather has been lovely in our neck of the woods (we won't talk about the soggy Far North), although pretty humid.

Hope it all settles down soon and no scumbags light any more fires.

Hugs.

Beth E. said...

What a lovely poem! I enjoyed reading it. As usual, your jokes crack me up! LOL

Thanks for bringing a little laughter to your buddies in blog land!

Sure hope things cool down there. The temperature here dropped to 12 degrees F last night. We've had a little snow, but mostly just cold temperatures!

Blessings...

Dave said...

Great post Merle... loved the koala pictures, and the retired joke a LOT!

Jeanette said...

Gday Dear Merle,Im a little slow this week.had a few early nights was feeling rather tired with the heat and couple of early starts.Pennants early rise was due to early start time had to be on the bus 7.30am for Tungamah ready to start roll up 8.40am. but the heat beat us again...Thursday was 5 am rise to be at Wang hospital 7.30am for Gwen to have Colonoscopy. her results were good.

Love the little Koala Pics Ive actually posted one from our local paper.great jokes love Why parents drink..

Take care Merle Tomorrows going to a hot one 44c forecast here Phewwwww.. im of to bed can hardly keep my eyes open Janxxxxxxxx

linda may said...

This summer has been a shocker hasn't it. Expecting 40 here today, yesterday it got to 39 and I worked in it, it was not pleasant. Today I stay inside shut out the heat and try to stay cool.
I loved that "shows in your face poem". I agree, I can read most people by looking at their faces, particularly their eyes.
Funny that Koala drinking they don't often do that , it must have been stressed.

Unknown said...

Blessings, Merle.

May Aussies have coolness where is it hot; dryness where it is wet; and wetness where it is dry.

Jim said...

Hi Merle, those were all very good. Now why do we call being bad good?
I loved the one with the little kids learning when to cuss and when not to.
Cheers,
..

audrey` said...

"It Shows In Your Face" reveals all our secrets. It's scary. HaHa!

Deborah Wilson said...

The koala bear is a cutie! Do they always love to take baths??

Great jokes - but "Why Parents Drink" is the best - if that were my kid, I'd drink too. lol