Wednesday, May 12, 2010

Woman and a Fork.

Post 681 ~ ~ ~ Wednesday, 12th May, 2010.

Hello Again My Friends ~ ~ I don't know where the days get to!! I do really ~ I
get to bed too late and then get up too late. My son John told me today it is a
week since I posted, and to try putting shorter posts on, instead of my long ones.

Well I got the letter today from the Vascular Specialist, so the waiting is over,
and the news is good. They have a cut-off length of 6 centimetres before they
repair these aneurysms and mine is 5 cm. So that is good and there were no
bad signs around it and the result is~~We leave it for 6 months and have another
CT scan to see if there is any change - so I am relieved to have a reprieve.

I hope all is going well in your lives, my friends and you are well and happy.

First joke tonight was sent by my dear friend Sherrill and also my son John.
Thank you both.

Inner Peace.

If you can start the day without caffeine,

If you can always be cheerful, ignoring aches and pains,

If you can resist complaining and boring people with your troubles,

If you can eat the same food every day and be grateful for it,

If you can understand when your loved ones are too busy to give you any time,

If you can take criticism and blame without resentment,

If you can conquer tension without medical help,

If you can relax without liquor,

If you can sleep without the aid of drugs,


--- Then You Are Probably The Family Dog!!!

And you thought I was going to get all spiritual!


<><><>

The nice story tonight was sent to me by two of my good friends, Patty and Lady Di.
Thank you both for " Woman and a Fork."

There was a young woman who had been diagnosed with a terminal illness and
had been given three months to live. So as she was getting her things " in order"
She contacted her Pastor and had him come to her house to discuss certain
aspects of her final wishes.

She told him which songs she wanted sung at the service, what scriptures she
would like read, and what outfit she wanted to be buried in.

Everything was in order and the Pastor was preparing to leave when the young
woman suddenly remembered something very important to her . . .

"There's one more thing," she said excitedly.

"What's that?" came the Pastor's reply.

"This is very important," the young woman continued . . "I want to be buried
with a fork in my right hand."

The Pastor stood looking at the young woman, not knowing what to say.

"That surprises you, doesn't it?" the young woman asked.

"Well, to be honest, I'm puzzled by the request," the Pastor replied.

The young woman explained . . . "My grandmother once told me this story, and
from that time on I have always tried to pass along its message to those I love
and those who are in need of encouragement. In all my years of attending
socials and dinners, I always remember that when the dishes of the main course
were being cleared, someone would inevitably lean over and say, "Keep your
fork." It was my favorite part because I knew something better was coming . . .
like velvety chocolate cake or deep dish apple pie. Something wonderful, with
substance!"

So, I just want people to see me there in that casket with a fork in my hand
and I want them to wonder "What's with the fork?" Then I want you to tell them:
"Keep your fork . . . the best is yet to come.

The Pastor's eyes welled up with tears of joy as he hugged the young woman
good-bye. He knew this would be one of the last times he would see her
before her death . . .but he also knew that this young woman had a better grasp
of heaven than he did. She had a better grasp of what heaven would be like
than many people twice her age, with twice as much experience and knowledge.
She KNEW that something better was coming.

At the funeral people were walking by the young woman's casket and they saw
the cloak she was wearing and the fork placed in her right hand . . Over and
over, the Pastor heard the question, "What's with the fork?" And over and over
he smiled.

During his message, the Pastor told the people of the conversation he had with
the young woman shortly before she died. He also told them about the fork and
what it symbolized to her. He told the people how he could not stop thinking
about the fork and told them that they probably would not be able to stop
thinking about it either.

He was right.So the next time you reach down for your fork let it remind you,
ever so gently, that the best is yet to come.

Friends are a very rare jewel . . Indeed they make you smile and encourage
you to succeed. Cherish the time you have, and the memories you share.

Being friends with someone is not an opportunity but a sweet responsibility.

And remember to keep your fork.
<><>

Next two items are from my dear friend Barbara. Thank you.

These are for you.
Life is too short to wake up with regrets.
Love the people who treat you right.
Forget about the ones who don't.

Believe everything happens for a reason.
If you get a second chance, grab it with both hands.
If it changes your life, let it.
Nobody said life would be easy.
They just promised it would be worth it.

Friends are like balloons.
Once you let them go, you can't get them back.
So I'm gonna tie you to my heart so I never lose you.
<><>

HOW MOSES GOT THE 10 COMMANDMENTS.

God went to the Arabs and said, I have Commandments for you that will
make your lives better."
The Arabs asked, "What are Commandments?
And the Lord said, "They are rules for living."

"Can you give us an example?"

"Thou shall not kill."

"Not kill? We're not interested."

So He went to the Blacks and said "I have Commandments."

The Blacks wanted an example. and the Lord said,"Honour your Father and
Mother."

"Father? We don't know who our fathers are. We're not interested."

Then He went to the Mexicans and said, " I have Commandments."

The Mexicans also wanted an example, and the Lord said,"Thou shall not steal."

"Not steal? We're not interested."

Then He went to the French and said, "I have Commandments."

The French wanted an example, and the Lord said "Thou shall not commit adultery."

"Not commit adultery? We're not interested."

Finally, He went to the Jews and said, :I have Commandments."

"Commandments?" They said, "How much are they?"

"They're free."

"We'll take 10."
<><>

One I borrowed from my good friend, Jeanette. Thanks Jan.

A woman was flying from Melbourne to Brisbane. Unexpectedly the plane
was diverted to Sydney along the way. The Flight Attendant explained that
there would be a delay, and if the passengers wanted to get off the aircraft,
the plane would re-board in 50 minutes.

Everybody got off the plane except one lady who was blind. A man had noticed
her as he walked by and could tell the lady was blind because her Guide-Dog lay
quietly underneath the seats in front of her throughout the entire flight.

He could also tell she had flown this very flight before, because as the pilot
approached her, calling her by name,said "Kathy, we are in Sydney for almost
an hour would you like to get off and stretch your legs?"

The blind lady replied, "No thanks, but maybe Buddy would like to stretch
his legs."
PICTURE THIS:

All the people in the gate area came to a complete standstill, when they looked
up and saw the pilot walk off the plane with a Guide dog.

The pilot was even wearing sunglasses.

They not only tried to change planes, but they were trying to change airlines!

True story . . . Have a great day and remember . . .

. . . .THINGS AREN'T ALWAYS AS THEY APPEAR.
<><>

Enough for this post folks. I hope you found something of interest and the
odd chuckle. Take care of yourselves and each other. Love and Best Wishes
to you all. Cheers, Merle.

Post 681 ~ ~ ~ Wednesday, 12th May, 2010.
<><><>





12 comments:

Jack K. said...

Huzzah!! Good news from your doctor. I knew you could do it. Stay healthy, that is.

I'd read the one about keeping your fork. What great advice.

Love and best wishes right back to you.

Ann said...

Hi Merle,

I'm glad to hear you are still doing OK. As OK goes. It seems as we age something is always breaking, aching, leaking, leaving out air, or ballooning. I hope your aneurysm doesn't change.

I got a chuckle out of the blind lady and the airline pilot. That would be a bit of a shock to see, I'm sure.

Yesterday I e-mailed my granddaughter the Killer Kitty story, we both got a big belly laugh out of it. I will be e-mailing her the Airline story today. Thanks for sharing it.

Have a great day and rest of the week.

Dave said...

Great story about the fork, and hilarious joke about the Commandments Merle!!

Glad that the scan came out well too!

Patty said...

So happy you don't have to have it taken care of right at the moment. Sounds like the doctors are keeping on top of things. Good luck. But still take it easy and don't over do things.

Patty said...

P.S. Still sitting here chuckling about the commandments. Great story. Like your son said, if you make your post shorter, you could save some for the next day, or do like I do, I try to post a few days ahead, but someone today slipped past me, but I found a blond joke and posted it. I'm trying to post blond jokes on Wed. LOL

Gledwood said...

Hi Merle
I'm glad the doctors seem to be on the right track...
... I've often wondered how animals seem to be so happy and the obvious answer is they probably don't think about yesterday or tomorrow
... An on the subject of peaceful sleep and all, I remember reading an article in the press about 15 years ago that said a new sleeping pill was being researched based on the sleep hormone from CATS
... Somehow the final product seems to have failed to appear on the open market... perhaps volunteers spat furballs... Or took to gazing out of windows for hours at birds... Or were caugt trying to mate at 3am on the garage roof... I dunno!

Margaret Cloud said...

That is real good news, I am happy for you. That inner peace is a good one, love the dog. That fork story was so touching. I can just imagine the people and how frighten they must of been scared seeing the sunglasses and dog, there must a been a stampede to the ticket teller. Good post, I enjoyed all the jokes.

Lady Di Tn said...

Merle
Thanks for sharing the Woman and a Fork story. It was sent to me by a dear old friend at a low point which lifted me up. Now the 10 commandments one is a hoot. I might have been one of those people lined up to switch air lines if I saw the pilot with a guide dog. I was playing catch up and read the killer kitty joke and was glad I did not have to relieve myself or else I would have wet my pants with laughter. Peace and I am so glad you got good news. Love and Prayers

bec said...

thats great news grandma!!!
hope its not getting to cold for you, its a bit chilly here, but i was always a bit of a sook about the cold haha
cheers Bec

Jim said...

That is good news abour your reprieve! You son is right, your posts don't have to be real long.
Blogging takes a lot of time!

My favorite today is the "Inner Peace" piece. Dogs pretty well have it made.
..

Jeanette said...

Gday Dear Merle . So pleased to hear about your letter and 6 months reprieve.. But that doesn't mean getting out in the garden. the women and the fork.. Merle you can Borrow as many jokes as you like . I still grin about the blind pilot when i read it and looks like all your viewers enjoyed it to..
Gees i had to get up 6.30this morning , as I listened to the news Yarrawonga was only 3c BRRRRRr
I was called in to play pennant in Wodonga.had to be at Club 7.45 for the bus,.. Well im having a very early night. been a long day.. Take care stay warm love Janxxxxxxx

Big Dave T said...

That is good news from the doctor. I always figure the longer I can put off medical procedures, the more likely they are to come up with a pill to fix it without surgery.

I'm so glad that inner peace had to do with dogs, because it sure didn't sound like me. I need my cafeine and alcohol.

I'll remember to keep my fork. But there are a lot of flesh-eating zombie movies here in the states and I know some people will get the wrong idea if they see me with a fork in my casket.