Tuesday, January 23, 2007

Death Explained.

Post 121 - - - - - - Tuesday, 23 rd January, 2007.


Hi Everybody ~~ I hope all is well with you and life is being kind. I am fine and had a good shopping day and didn't forget a thing !! Also I felt pleased to know that the profit from all sales today from Woolworth Supermarkets all over the country were to go to the farmers in need, from drought and fires. In Victoria, we call them Safeway super-markets, but they are all Woolworths, The Fresh Food People. ( Safeway, The Fresh Food People.) I nearly always shop there.

We also have large department stores called Big W. Do you have them overseas?
There were two small stalls also supporting the Charity day. One was selling
Ice Cones and the other The Country Women' Association. I dodged the first, but
bought some cook books from the CWA ladies, who were most grateful for the help
given to them today. There are some good bits and pieces among the recipes, which
I will include later on.

First an item called "Death ~~ What a wonderful to explain it !!! Thanks Linda.

A sick man turned to his doctor, as he was preparing to leave the examination room
and said, "Doctor, I am afraid to die. Tell me what lies on the other side?"

Very quietly, the doctor said, "I don't know."
"You don't know? You a Christian man, do not know what's on the other side?"

The doctor was holding the handle of the door; on the other side came a sound of scratching and whining, and as he opened the door, a dog sprang into the room and
leaped on him with an eager show of gladness.

Turning to the patient, the doctor said, "Did you notice my dog? He's never been in this room before. He didn't know what was inside.
He knew nothing except that his master was here, and when the door opened, he
sprang in without fear.

I know little of what is on the other side of death, but I do know one thing . . .
I know my Master is there and that is enough."

<><><>
May today there be peace within you.
May you trust God that you are exactly where you are meant to be.
I believe that friends are quiet angels who lift us to our feet
when our wings have trouble remembering how to fly.

<><><> Now some jokes from the new Cookbook.

Ever heard of the TATE family? I was introduced to them recently.

There's the head of the family, DIC TATE, who wants to run everything.

Uncle RO TATE, tries to change everything, and his sister AGI TATE, who likes
stirring things up whenever she can.

Nephew IRRI TATE always rubs people the wrong way., and nieces HESI TATE,
and VEGI TATE. pour cold water on every proposal.

Then there's Aunt IMI TATE, who's all for trying something new just because
someone else is doing it.

And of course, cousin DEVAS TATE will always throw a spanner into the works.

You're sure to know the TATES, for they sit on every committee, live in every street,
join every club, travel on every bus, work in every factory, shop or office -- watch
out you don't become one of them.
<><><>

It was on the back of a bookmark from Hong Kong. " If there is sufficient muck
thrown around, some of it sticks. If there is sufficient sunshine flashed around
some of it penetrates." Think about it.

A friendly neighbour rang his mate down the road. "Your cat, Ginger Mick," isn't
he a big ginger tom with white markings?" "Yeah, that's Ginger Mick," said his mate.

" Well," the neighbour went on, "for the last two hours I've been watching him run up and down every street at speeds of up to 60 kmh."
"That's Ginger Mick," answered the mate.
"I've never seen anything like it in my life . . . .what's wrong with him?"
"There's nothing wrong with him. It's just that I've had him fixed."

"So why is he charging around the neighbourhood, if you've had him fixed?"
"Quite simple," said his friend. "He's running around cancelling all his appointments"
<><><>

Keep it Simple.

Three sons left home, went out on their own and prospered in different areas of the
motor industry. Getting back together they discussed the gifts they were able to
give their mother.
The first, from the manufacturing side of the industry said, " I built a big house for
our mother.
The second from the sales side said, " I sent her a Mercedes Benz with a driver."

The third from the repair sector smiled and said, "I've got you both beat. You
remember how Mum enjoyed reading the Bible? And you know she can't see very well. So I sent her a remarkable parrot that recites the entire Bible. It took the
Elders in the church 12 years to teach him. He's one of a kind. Mum just has to name the Chapter and verse and the parrot recites it."

So thereafter, Mum sent her letters of thanks.
"Milton," she wrote one son. "The house is so huge I live in only one room, but I have to clean the whole house."

"Gerald," she wrote another. "I am too old to travel. I stay at home mostly, so I rarely use the Mercedes. And the driver is so rude."

"Dearest Donald," she writes to her third son. "You have the good sense to know what your mother likes. The chicken was delicious !!!"
<><><>

The doctor
tells the patient he has very bad flu. The patient says he wants second opinion. The doctor says, "OK, you're ugly too."

The art of medicene consists in amusing the patient while Nature affects a cure.
- - - - Voltaire.

If a doctor treats your cold, it will go away in 14 days. If you leave it alone, it will go
away in two weeks. - - - Gloria Silverstein.


A man walks into the pharmacy and asks the pharmacist, "Do you have any
acetylsalicylic acid?"
"Do you mean aspirin?" asks the pharmacist.
"That's it. I can never remember that word."
<><><>

Little Johnny rushes home after school. He invades the fridge and is scooping out
some cherry vanilla icecream when his mother enters the kitchen. She says, " Put that away little Johnny. You can't have icecream now. It is too close to supper time.
Go outside and play."
Little Johnny whimpers, " There's no one to play with."
Trying to placate him, she says, "OK I'll play with you. What do you want to play?"

"I wanna play Mommie and Daddy," little Johnny whines in reply.
Trying not to register surprise, and to further appease him, she says "Fine. I'll
play. What do I do?"
Little Johnny says, "You go up to the bedroom and lie down as if you're taking a nap."
Figuring that she can easily control the situation, Mom goes upstairs.

Little Johnny, acting a bit cocky, swaggers down the hall and opens the utility closet.
He puts on his father's old fishing hat. As he starts up the stairs, he notices a cigarette
in the ash tray. He picks it up and slips it in the corner of his mouth. At the top of the stairs he moves to the bedroom doorway.

His mother raises her head and asks, "What do I do now?"
In a gruff manner, Little Johnny says, " Get downstairs and get that kid some
ice cream !!"
<><><>

Just a few quotes - - - -

What counts is not necessarily the size of the dog in the fight --- it's the size of the
fight in the dog. - - - Dwight D Eisenhower.

You will do foolish things, but do them with enthusiasm. - - - Colette.

Some people get lost in thought because it is such unfamiliar terrority. - -G. Behn.

Grow angry slowly. There is plenty of time. - - - Ralph Waldo Emerson.

Bye for now, my friends. Take care and be happy. Cheers, Merle.

Post 121 - - - - - - -
Tuesday, 23rd January, 2007.
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14 comments:

Raggedy said...

You had two new post since my last visit so I got a two fer 120 and 121.
Great posts! I loved them both!
Thank you!
A visit here just makes my day!
Have a wonderful day!
*^_^
(=':'=) hugs
(")_ (")Š from
the Cool Raggedy one

Joy Des Jardins said...

What a wonderful gesture...to give the farmers the profits. This must be a very difficult time for all of them.

I've never heard of Big W department stores over here Merle. Years ago...we use to have Woolworth's...which I loved. They have long been gone.

Hope you're staying cool sweetie...

Hootin Anni said...

Hi Merle.
Ya, in the States we do have a Safeway chain grocery store.

And the charity is fabulous. I've not been here to read your blog for a few days, so I must catch up on the farmer's situation! How sad, huh?

Talk atcha later...I wanna go read what I've missed out on here of late.

Have a G'day.
*singing a song now..."G'day, G'day, how ya going..."

Lee Ann aka Dixie said...

Hey Merle,

You had asked me if we had Woolworth's Supermarkets... No, we use to have Woolworth's which was what we called a Dime Store or Variety Store with a counter restaurant in it.

Love the jokes... especially Little Johnny.... who can't love Little Johnny

LZ Blogger said...

Merle ~ DEATH and the Master... I like that one! ~ jb///

Gattina said...

That's a good thing to give this to the poor people who were damaged by the bushfires ! I only know Safeway, it exists in the UK and I always did my shopping there when I stayed with my son in London.

JunieRose2005 said...

Merle,

Enjoyed the post- all the jokes-and I liked that about death too> Makes sense!



Junie

Lee said...

It's very muggy up this way today, Merle. I've just washed my floors and I'm dripping wet! Wetter than my floors! Hopefully, it's heralding better things to come, like rain! We had a big downfall yesterday that lasted an hour or so. We're okay up here on the mountain for water but the rest of south-east Queensland is still in dire straits. Let's hope the rain that's inundated the western interiors moves closer to the catchment areas.

Carole Burant said...

Hello dear Merle...gosh, that's awful how many hectares have burned since the fires began. I hate to think of all the animals that might have died in them:-( We don't have the Woolworth Supermarkets or Safeway stores here in the Northern part of Ontario...not sure if they have them in the southern part or other provinces.Loved all the jokes...Little Johhny sure can get in a lot of trouble can't he! lol Take care dear Merle! Hugs xoxo

Susie said...

Hi Merle,
The death explanation was very good. I find it timely..
We have Safeway here and used to have Woolworth's. I haven't seen them in many years..
hugs!

Pamela said...

Merle, I gasped when I read "the chicken was delicious", can you imagine...lol Love the one about the Tate Family, so cute!

I am so curious about the Woolworth Supermarkets. My hubby was a General Manager of Woolworth's for 15 years. Then they went belly up. They never sold grocery's, but were always a discount retail store. The only thing left of the company here is the Foot Locker Shoe Store Division. Just interesting isn't it.

Unknown said...

Merle, that’s a lovely and theologically valid explanation of death. Thank you.

Puss-in-Boots said...

I like the Colette quote by doing foolish things with enthusiasm...that's me!

But-I liked the explanation of death-eminently sensible!

Have a good week. BTW, it's raining, has been for about an hour or so and going onto the BOM website, there's a little more still to come. Yessss!

Jeanette said...

Dear Merle
Loved your post Death explained.thats a good cook book hahaha. and poor little johnny always up to something lol. take care Merle.love Janxxx