Wednesday, March 07, 2007


Post 159 - - - - - Wednesday, 7 th March, 2007.

Howdy Folks ~~ I hope you are all doing well and enjoying your lives. I am fine and
glad to be home blogging again. And it is nice to read about what you have been up to. Because I couldn't go shopping on Tuesday, I am to go tomorrow instead, so will have to work out my shopping list later on. My sons have been good ringing to check on me. I must ring the girls tomorrow, they knew it was coming, but not that it has come and gone. I do wish that they lived closer.

Tonight I have a story called "Sisters"
that my friend Linda sent a while ago.

A young wife sat on a sofa on a hot humid day, drinking iced tea with her Mother.
As they talked about life, about marriage, about the responsibilities of life and the
obligations of adulthood, the mother clinked the ice cubes in her glass thoughtfully and turned a clear sober glance upon her daughter.

"Don't forget Sisters," she advised, swirling the tea leaves to the bottom of her glass.
"They'll be more important as you get older, No matter how much you love your
husband, no matter how much you love the children you may have, you are still going to need sisters. Remember to go places with them now and again, and do things with them."

Remember that 'sisters' means ALL women - - - your girlfriends, your daughters, and all other women relatives. You'll need other women. Women always do."

'What a funny piece of advice !' the young woman thought. "Haven't I just got married? Haven't I just joined the couple world? I'm now a married woman, for goodness sake ! A grown-up ! Surely my husband and the family we may start will be all I need to make my life worthwhile !"

But she listened to her Mother. She kept contact with her sisters and made more women friends each year. As the years tumbled by one after another, she gradually
came to understand that her Mom really knew what she was talking about. As time
and nature work their mysteries upon a woman. Sisters are the mainstay of her life.

After nearly 50 years of living in this world, here is what I learned: Time passes.
Life happens. Distance separates. Children grow up. Jobs come and go.
Love waxes and wanes. Men don't do what sisters do. Hearts break. Parents die.
Careers end.

But - - - SISTERS are there , no matter how much time and how many miles are between you. A girlfriend is never farther away, than needing her, can reach.

When you have to walk that lonesome valley, and you have to walk it by yourself, the
women in your life will be on the valley's rim, cheering you on, praying for you, pulling for you, intervening on your behalf, and waiting with open arms at the valley's end ! Sometimes, they will even break the rules and walk beside you or come in and carry you out.

Girlfriends, daughters, granddaughters, daughters-in-law, sisters and sisters-in-law
Mothers, Grandmothers, aunts, nieces, cousins and extended family all bless our lives.

The world wouldn't be the same without these women, and neither would I.
When we began this adventure called womanhood, we had no idea of the incredible
joys or sorrows that lay ahead. Nor did we know how much we would need each other. Every day, we need each other still.

Divorce Joke.
A judge was interviewing a woman regarding her pending divorce, and asked, "What
grounds do you have for your divorce?"

She replied, "About four acres and a nice little home in the middle of the property
with a stream running by."

"No," he said, "I mean what is the foundation of this case?"
"It is made of concrete, brick and mortar," she responded.

"I mean what are your relations like?"
"I have an aunt and uncle living here in town, and so do my husband's parents."

He said, Do you have a real grudge?"
"No," she replied. We have a two car carport and have never really needed one."

"Please," he tried again, "is there any infidelity in your marraige?"
"Yes, both my son and daughter have stereo sets. We don't necessarily like the music, but the answer to your question is yes."

"Ma'am, does your husband ever beat you up?"
"Yes, " she responded, "about twice a week he gets up earlier than me."

Finally, in frustration, the judge asked, "Lady, why do you want a divorce?"

"Oh, I don't want a divorce," she replied, "I've never wanted a divorce. My husband
does. He said he can't communicate with me !!"

Rules That Guys Wish Girls Knew !!
1. If you think you are fat, you probably are. Don't ask us.
2. Learn to work the toilet seat : if it's up, put it down.
3. Don't cut your hair. Ever.
4. Birthdays, Valentines, Anniversaries are not quests to see if he can find the
perfect present . . . . again.
5. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, expect an answer you don't
want to hear.
6. Sometimes, he's not thinking about you. Live with it.
7. Don't ask him what he's thinking about unless you are prepared to discuss such
topics as navel lint, the shotgun formation, and monster trucks.
8. Get rid of your cat, And no, it's not different . . .it's just like every other cat.
9. Dogs are better than ANY cats. Period.
10. Sunday = Sports. It's like the full moon or the changing of the tides. just let it be.
11. Shopping is not a sport.
12. Anything you wear is fine. Really.
13. You have enough clothes.
14. You have too many shoes.
15. Crying is like blackmail. Use it if you must, don't expect us to like it.
16. Your brother is an idiot, your ex boyfriend is an idiot, and your Dad probably is.
17. Ask for what you want. Subtle hints don't work.
18. No, he doesn't know what day it is. He never will. Mark anniversaries on the

19. Yes, pissing standing up is more difficult than peeing from point blank range.
We are bound to miss sometimes.
20. Most guys own 2 or 3 pairs of shoes. What makes you think we'd be any good at
choosing which pair out of thirty goes with your dress?
21. Yes
and No are perfectly acceptable answers.
22. A headache that lasts for 17 months is a problem. See a doctor.
23. Your Mom doesn't have to be our best friend.
24. Foreign films are best left to foriegners.
25. Check your oil.
26. Don't give us 50 rules when 25 will do.
27. Don't fake it. We'd rather be ineffective than deceived.
28. It is neither in your best interest nor ours to take the quiz together.
29. Anything we said 5 or 8 month ago is inadmissible in an argument. All
comments become null and void after seven days.
30. If you don't dress like the Victoria's Secret girls, don' expect us to act like soap
opera guys.
31. If something we said can be interpreted 2 ways, and one of the way makes
you sad or angry, we meant the other one.
32. Let us ogle. If we don't look at other women, how can we know how pretty you
33. Don't rub the lamp if you don't want the genie to come out.
34. You can either ask us to do something, OR you tell us how you want it done.
Not both.
35. Whenever possible, please say whatever you have to say during commercials.
36. Christopher Columbus didn't need directions, and neither do we.
37. Women wearing Wonderbras and low-cut blouses lose their right to complain
about having their boobs stared at.
38. Consider golf a mini-vacation from you. We need it just like you do.
39. Telling us that models in men's magazines are airbrushed makes you look
jealous and petty and it's certainly not going to deter us from reading
the magazines.
40. The relationship is never going to be like it was during the first two months we
were going out.

An Irishman named Pat orders a large pizza. When it is cooked, the pizza man asks,
"Do you want it cut into six or eight pieces, Pat?"

Pat replies, "You better cut it intp six pieces. I could not eat eight".

That's it for tonight, my friends. Take care, and be kind to one another. Merle.

Post 159 - - - - - Wednesday, 7 th March, 2007.


Tammy said...

I just love the bit about "Sisters"!!
I want to tell you, you are one of my blogging sisters and I love YOU!!!

Tracie said...

Hi Merle
Just stopping by to say hello - good to read your jokes - glad your home - take care from tracie

PEA said...

Dearest glad to see that you're home and blogging again! I didn't have a chance to visit anyone yesterday so I'm catching up today. I'm sure you're relieved to have that done and over with:-) Your daughters will certainly be surprised to learn it's all done already! lol Loved the Sisters story...I always wanted a sister but instead I've been very lucky to get all of you dear blogging friends in my life!! xoxo

JunieRose2005 said...

Loved the Irish joke!! ;) Junie

Christina said...

I enjoyed the sisters story - how true it is.

good jokes, esp. the "guys rules"

zhasha said...

thanks for sharing sister!

take care and be well always..

Raggedy said...

G'day Merle,
Enjoy your shopping trip. I wish my family lived closer as well.
Great post!
Take care,
Hugs and Love,

Jeanette said...

Dear Merle.Great post as usual, loved the "sisters" and had a chuckle at the jokes.Take care dont tire yourself out while shopping, Love Jan

Jim said...

Enjoy your shopping outing.
Women ought to be required to know those men pleasing items by heart before they marry.
It would solve a lot of marriage problems. Mrs. Jim would score high here.
P.S. It's about time for Mrs. Jim's annual evaluation. These rules might be good ones for me to score her by this year.

Puss-in-Boots said...

Hi Merle,

It's good to see you're feeling up to going shopping! Always good therapy, that.

Yes, I read the men pleasing requirements before but didn't take them seriously...they're not, are they?

As for the Sisters story, I have no sisters (4 brothers). Anyway, I had to tell you that I've "nicked" that to send on to women friends of mine. Hope you don't mind.

Enjoy yourself tomorrow, Merle, but be sure to pace yourself, too. It would spoil it for you if you got tired before you'd finished shopping (by the way...are you going to Bunnings?...grin).

Lee said...

Hello, Merle...sorry I've not been in for a couple of days. I've been missing in action this week...been very busy.

I'm so glad all is well with you. Take good care of yourself and don't go over-doing things. :)