Wednesday, February 13, 2008

Happy Birthday Nick.

A Happy Valentine's Day to you all.

Post 409 ~ ~ ~ Wednesday, 13th February, 2008.

Hello Everyone ~~ Hope you are all doing well and I
hope that you all have a very Happy St. Valentine's Day tomorrow.
I was first married on that day in 1953 ~~ 55 years ago.

We have another birthday in the blogosphere tomorrow. The
lucky person is Sometimes Saintly Nick. I hope you have a great
day Nick, with many happy returns of the day. Please pop over to
help Nick celebrate.

Now to explain last night's joke, which means it was not very funny.

It was about a radio station having a spelling contest. The question
being ~~What did old Macdonald have?

The American said a ranch ~spelt RANCH (farm)

The Aussie said a station ~ spelt STATION. (farm)

The Irishman knew that Old Macdonald had a farm but instead of
spelling it ~FARM he spelt it like the song does.

Old Macdonald had a farm, ee eye ee eye oh. Hence E I E I O.

If that doesn't sort it out, just forget it.
<><>

Since I am here, a couple of jokes for you.

The only seat available on the train was directly adjacent to a
well dressed middle-aged French woman and the seat was being
used by her dog.

The weary traveller asked, "Ma'am, could you please move
your dog as I need that seat ?"

The French woman looked down her nose at the American and
said, "You Americans. You are such a rude class of people. Can't
you see my little Fifi needs that seat."

The American walked away, determined to find a place to rest, but
after another trip down to the end of the train, found himself again
facing the woman with the dog.

Again he asked, "Please lady. May I sit there? I'm very tired."
The French woman wrinkled her nose and snorted, "You Americans!
Not only are you rude, you are also arrogant. Imagine ."

The American didn't say anything else. He leaned over and picked
up the dog, tossed it out the window of the train and sat down in the
empty seat.

The woman shrieked and railed, and demanded that someone defend
her honour and chastise the American.

An Englishman sitting across the aisle spoke up indignantly, "You
know sir, you Americans do seem to have a penchant for doing the
wrong thing. You eat holding your fork in the wrong hand. You drive
on the wrong side of the road. And now, sir, you've thrown the
wrong bitch out the window."
<><><>

An Irishman, a Mexican and a blond guy were doing construction
work on scaffolding on the 20th floor of a building.


They were eating lunch and the Irishman says, "Corned beef and
cabbage. If I get corned beef and cabbage one more time for lunch
I'm going to jump off this
building."

The Mexican guy opened up his lunch box and exclaimed, "Burritos
again. If I get burritos one more time I'm going to jump off, too.

The blond guy open his lunch and said, "Salami, again. If I get
a salami sandwich one more time, I'm jumping too."

The next day the Irishman opened his lunch box, saw corned beef
and cabbage and jumped to his death.

The Mexican guy opened his lunch, saw a burrito and jumped too.

The blond guy opened his lunch, saw the salami sandwich and
jumped to his death as well.

At the funeral, the Irishman's wife was weeping. She said, If I'd
have known how really tired he was of corned beef and cabbage
I never would have given it to him again.

The Mexican's wife also wept and said, "I could have given him
tacos or enchilades. I didn't realise he hated burritos so much.

Everyone turned and stared at the blond's wife. "Hey, don't
look at me," she said. "He makes his own lunch."
<><><>

The father of five children had won a toy in a raffle. He called
his kids together to ask which one should have the present.

"Who is the most obedient? he asked. "Who never talks back
to the mother? Who does everything she says ?"

Five small voices in unison answered. "OK, Dad, you
get the toy."
<><>


A policeman pulls over a driver who has a VB label stuck to his
forehead. The policeman asks. "Have you been drinking ?"

The driver replies, "No, I've given up. I'm on the patches now."
<><>

That is it for tonight folks as it is midnight and I have had a busy
day. I cooked lots of meals, Corned beef and heaps of vegetables.
Look after yourselves and each other. Have a Happy Day for
Valentine's Day tomorrow. I hope you all get some flowers and
or chocolates. Most of all be Happy. It feels good.
Love and best wishes to you all. Cheers, Merle.

Post 409 ~ ~ ~ Wednesday, 13th February, 2008.

<><><>





Happy Valentines Day

11 comments:

Patty said...

Hope you had a good nights rest. Sounds like you were busy up till bedtime. I liked the three construction workers. But I also like the other jokes, I always enjoy them. More later.

Lady Di Tn said...

Merle
The flowers from your friend are lovely. John is a very helpful young man.
How very romantic to have been married on Valentine day.
Thanks for making me laugh. Have a wonderful evening and Happy Valentines to you.
Peace

Mountain Mama said...

Happy Valentines day to you too dear Merle. I love your jokes. It seems Corned Beef is getting a running start for St. Patrick's day. Sounds good too. I love mine with horseradish. Mmmmmm.

audrey` said...

(((HUGS)))

Happy Valentine's Day, Merle =)

Deborah Wilson said...

Merle,

That is so romantic, to be married on Valentine's Day..:)

And here's to both, a beloved anniversary and a Happy Valentine's Day.

Unknown said...

Thank you, Merle. And a happy and blessed St. Val’s Day to you!

Dave said...

Happy Valentines Day Merle!!!!

ancient one said...

Happy Valentines Day!! Loved the jokes!!

Carole Burant said...

Happy Valentine's Day to you too, dear Merle:-) It's getting late and I'm practically falling asleep in my computer chair but I was determined to visit all my friends to wish them a Happy Valentine's Day! Your jokes always make me smile...I'll probably be laughing in my sleep now! lol Take care my friend and know that I'm thinking of you! xox

Michele said...

Aaaawww, Happy Anniversary and Happy Valentine's Day, Merle!

Smiles,
Michele

Renie Burghardt said...

Hope your Valentine's Day was wonderful, dear Merle!

Love and Hugs,

Renie