Thursday, January 20, 2011

Don't Quit.

Post 721 ~ ~ ~ Thursday, 20th January, 2011.

Hello again Everyone ~ ~ Thank you all for your concern and prayers for
Australia during the recent floods. They are still on-going in many places
although the worst seems to be over. There are still towns flooded in and
roads cut and people still being evacuated in Victoria. I am safe here I
think. I hope that your lives are good and life is a joy.

I am tired as I have been out 3 days this week, Doctor on Monday and most
of my tests were really good, one not so good. Shopping Tuesday and that
knocks me around -- by the time I out away a fortnight's shopping, I am
ready to sleep the rest of the day. Then yesterday I had to have a CT scan
as the Dr. thinks I may have kidney stones again. So today, here I am and
not stepping outside the gate.

The first item today is called "Don't Quit" by Edgar A Guest.

When things go wrong, as they sometimes will,
When the road you're trudging seems all uphill,

When the funds are low and the debts are high,
And you want to smile, but you have to sigh,

When care is pressing you down a bit,
Rest, if you must, but do not quit.

Life is queer with it's twists and turns,
As e
very one of us sometimes learns,

And many a failure turns about,
When he might have won had he stuck it out;

Don't give up though the pace seems slow--
You may succeed with another blow.

Often the goal is nearer than,
It seems to a faint and faltering man.

Often the struggler has given up,
When he might have captured the victor's cup,

And he learned too late when the night slipped down,
How close he was to the golden crown.

Success is failure turned inside out --
The silver tint of clouds of doubt,

And you can never tell how close you are,
It may be near when it seems so far.

So stick to the fight when you're hardest hit --
It's when things seem worst that you must not quit.
<><>

This could apply to so many flood victims mostly in
Queensland who have lost everything - their homes and
livelihood, farms and stock and all they own. And in some
cases loved ones. I felt so sorry for the mother and 2 boys
sitting on top of a car, and the younger boy was saved, but
the mother and elder son were washed away and drowned.
Now a lot of them find their Insurance companies will not
pay up -- apparently a flood isn't a flood in many cases.
<><>

First 2 jokes were sent by my friend Warren in Q'ld (and safe)
A self explanatory cartoon. Thanks Warren.




Second one from Warren is called "An Old Nun,"

An old nun who was living in a convent next to a construction
site noticed the coarse language of the workers and decided
to spend some time with them to correct their ways.

She decided she would take her lunch, sit with the workers and
talk to them. She put her sandwich in a brown bag and walked
over to the spot where the men were eating.

She walked up to the group and with a big smile said, "and do
you men know Jesus Christ?" They shook their heads and
looked at each other very confused. One of the workers looked
up into the steelworks and yelled out, "Anybody up there
know Jesus Christ?" One of the steelworkers yelled, "Why?"

The worker yelled back, "Cos his wife is here with his lunch."
<><>

My Canberra friend sent a new 2011 prayer. Thank you.

Dear God, All I ask is a big fat bank account and a slim body
please and don't mix them up like you did last year. Amen.
<><>

One from my friend Gina, "Thank heaven for little girls."

A little girl comes from play for her Tea one evening and
says to her mummy, "Mummy Carl and Jimmy keep trying
to get me to do somersaults and handstands."

"Oh my, " Mummy says, "They are just trying to see your
knickers." "That's all right then," says the little girl,
"Cus I put them in my pocket."
<><>

A few that were sent from my cousin Bill, Thank you Bill.
Nudity.
I was driving with my three young children one warm
summer evening when a woman in the convertible ahead of
us stood up and waved. She was stark naked. As I was reeling
from the shock, I heard my 5 year old shout from the back
seat, "Mom, that lady isn't wearing a seat belt."


Opinions.
On the first day of school, a first-grader handed his teacher
a note from his mother, It read, "The opinions expressed
by this child are not necessarily those of his parents."

Ketchup.
A woman was trying hard to get the ketchup out of the jar.
During her struggle the phone rang so she asked the 4 year
old daughter to answer the phone. "Mommy can't come to
the phone to talk to you right now. She's hitting the bottle."

More Nudity.
A little boy got lost at the YMCA and found himself in the
women's locker room. When he was spotted, the room burst
into shrieks, with ladies grabbing towels and running for
cover. The little boy
watched in amazement and then asked,
"What's the matter, haven't you ever seen a little boy before?"

Police.
While taking a routine vandalism report at an elementary school,
I was interrupted by a little girl about 6 years old, looking up
and down my uniform. She asked, :Are you a cop?" "Yes," I
answered and continued writing the report.
"My mother said if I ever needed help, I should ask the police.
Is that right?" "Yes, that's right," I told her.
"Well then,," she said, as she extended her foot toward me,
"Would you please tie my shoe?"

Police.
It was the end of the day when I parked my police van in
front of the station. As I gathered my equipment, my K-9
partner, Jake was barking and I saw a little boy staring at
me. "Is that a dog you got back there?" "It sure is." I
replied. Puzzled the boy looked at me and then towards
the back of the van. Finally, he said, "What'd he do?"
<><>

Well, it is time for me to close this post. Stay well, my
friends and enjoy your lives. Share a smile where there
aren't any. Love and best wishes to you all. Cheers, Merle.

Post 721 ~ ~ ~ Thursday, 20th January, 2011.
<><><>

20 comments:

Peter said...

"See" you later hopefully through two eyes.

Art by JFM said...

Merle you are a lovely person to share your life and to share jokes to help brighten our days and put a smile on our faces...thank you.

By the way I share your jokes with my 88 year young aunt who loves to give hugs and laugh.

Granny Annie said...

I am not hearing that the USA is sending aid and I am appalled. I hope we are assisting your flood victims in some way.

Where you find all this extremely funny stuff is beyond me. It looks like you would run out of material but you just keep it coming. Thanks always for the cheer.

Theanne... said...

Regret so much the devastating loss many have suffered...happy you and your family OK...hope you can get the kidney stones taken care of soon...as always thanks for the cheer and the laughs!

Mountain Mama said...

Merle I hope your tests are ok and you do not have kidney stones again. OUCH!!!
I have heard on the news about the flooding there and pray you will not be affected.
Love your jokes as always.
Thanks for sharing with us.

Dave said...

Here's hoping all your future tests come back exactly to your liking!

Great jokes too, as always Merle!

Winifred said...

Glad to hear you are safe Merle.

Hope your kidney stones are sorted soon.

Rob said...

Hi Merle, I'm pleased to hear that the flooding is easing a little although I know it will be a long time before things get back to normal for those who got flooded out of their homes as we had a flood in these parts a few years ago and it took over a year for some people to get back in to their homes. At least your home is okay and you're safe and have a place to rest after doing that shopping.

Jim said...

You saved the best for last, Merle! :)
I do hope you don't have those kidney stones again or that they can be taken care of without hurting you.
You have nice friends who send you the funny stuff. It is all good. The cavemen/cavelady cartoon link I e-mailed to a couple of friends. That was an irreversible mistake those guys made! :)
Cheers,
..

Big Dave T said...

Funny stuff, Merle. I liked all your jokes though I'm not sure what knickers are. Somtimes the nuances in language stump me. I wasn't sure what wellies were either.

Glad the floodwaters are receding and that most of your tests were just fine. That was something seeing those floods on TV. And it sure looked like a flood to me, regardless of what the insurance folk there say.

Puss-in-Boots said...

Hello Merle, thank you for your birthday wishes. I had a lovely day.

I do hope you don't have kidney stones. Ouch...painful!

Love the jokes, especially the last lot from your cousin.

I hope the CT is negative for kidney stones and that you are keeping well. Peter says he's had his cataracts remnoved. Isn't that great...now he'll be able to read our blogs...lol!

Janice said...

Merle,

My prayers and thoughts go out to the flood victims. I hope they can rebuild their homes and recover from this disaster.

Janice~

jel said...

hope all is well !

huggs

Gina E. said...

Hi Merle, I am so pleased for you that you are safe from the floods up in your part of Victoria.
Not good about the kidney stones; I've never suffered with those but from what I've been told they can be extremely painful.
Putting all your shopping away in one go is very tiring - even for me, and I'm xxxx years younger than you ;- )
I put all the cold stuff in the fridge first, and leave the rest for later in the day.

Gledwood said...

Hi Merle I hope all is proper at yours. I know a lot of the rest of Australia isn't OK any more (to put it mildly).

Isn't it typical that going to a dr should be knackering. Have you ever felt too ill to go? That's crazy, I remember once telling myself I was "too ill too see the dr" (can't even remember why) don't think that one got past my inner school-teacher who bosses me around

that's why people are occasionally bemused when I say I'm "not allowed" to do such an such... it's because I won't allow myself! I do have some self control y'know. Well you probably would know, they wouldn't. They're sitting on the opposite side of a fence from you. Theirs is strewn with rubbish and messed up lives. Yours has a freshly mown lawn, purring cat, nice shrubbery clean clothes.

I hope all's well re your health situation. It is a real pain sorting stuff like that. Especially when appointments seem 365 million years apart. Unless you're literally dying, in which case the timing wouldn't be convenient (never is) you have to wait wait wait wait wait.

I'm not complaining. Rather be waiting than dying, know what I mean!

I'm OK I got a little bit hyped up over the past few days. Everyone thinks I'm hilariously funny, when I'm in a good mood. Probably because I cannot stop cracking jokes. I'm not sleeping well. Took a sleeping pill around half ten, in bed just before midnight, up by half one, surfing in bed (my secret way of falling back to sleep without trying and it worked... but not for long enough! It's now practically 7am so I'm up up UP! No time to waste. Today is Cleaning My House day. My family suggested I used some of my energy to clear up before but my concentration got so bad... if you look back at some of the fractured up posts I wrote, those are how I'd have written in my own diary (quickly, not edited) to show myself how I was, so they're me. I know they look weird but I realized at the time that to edit the "worst" out would be lying to myself. Now at least I have a record of who I've been which can only be good, surely..?

Sorry to go on, Merle. Keep Well

and Viva Australia!

Gledwood said...

ps I'm doing NA. 5 meetings a week. I get evenings off.

And I'm not doing 3 meetings a day as someone kindly and wellmeaningly suggested. I do have other things to do. 3 meetings a day. That's how to go truly cuckoo!!

They do help though. It's not the craving or anything else. They seem far more obsessive over drugs than me. Why on earth would I want to take drugs now when I'm having my own private free every single day rave party? I come for the Serenity. That's my reason.

God grant me the serenity
to accept the things I cannot change
the courage to change the things I can
and the wisdom
to know the difference.

That's what we pray.

LZ Blogger said...

Merle ~ Glad to hear all is well! I bet the guys liked the cartoon more than the ladies did? ~ j///b

Gledwood said...

Hi Merle

Thanks for your message at mine.

I don't want to go on and on too much (I know I do).

I just hope everything goes back to normal for people in devastation.

I'm glad you're OK.

Please take care of yourself.

I said more at mine but it's a bit babblesome so I'll leave it there!

;-)

xx

Joy Des Jardins said...

Appointments tire me out too Merle. I hope your CAT Scan goes well...and I hope you haven't been too uncomfortable. Good Luck sweet friend.

Good news that the worst of the flooding is over...even though I know it will be some time before there's any normalcy there. Take care Merle... Love, Joy

Margaret Cloud said...

Glad to hear you are still safe from the floods, still praying for those in harms way. Don't it just knock you out when you have to go out and about, me too. Really like the "Don't Quit"." That cartoon is really funny, and boy are they right. I really enjoyed all the stories and jokes. I always feel better after coming here. Have a nice weekend.